It was the only school shooting that made the world smile. McKinley High. All of the students…were dead. Apparently some Kings of Leon fans got together with die-hard Paul McCartney lovers who also happened to have a deep respect for The Killers, and all hell broke loose. It started with Alexander Rhodes—leader of the musical revolution—the rebel with a cause worth fighting for.
It began on a Tuesday. Melinda Rhodes, age ten, was watching Glee in the family's living room. Her older brother, seventeen-year-old Alexander, arrived home.
"What are you watching?" he asked, grimacing in distaste at the sight of two middle-aged people making out. "And why are these people dressed like cheerleaders?"
"It's Glee," she replied. "They are cheerleaders." Shocked and horrified, Alexander sat down to see what the fuck was going on.
After sitting through three episodes, he saw the Killers song performed.
"Oh, hell no," he growled, heading to the nearest computer to research this travesty. He learned of the fact that the Glee people were putting pressure on Kings of Leon to let them use one of their songs. The Kings, awesome dudes that they are, were refusing. Proud but downtrodden, Alexander wondered what he could do to keep this thing from happening—classic songs were being taken out of context and used to tell stories about whiny, bratty teenagers with totally unrealistic plot lines and dialogue. He knew what he had to do—start a Facebook group.
…
Alexander organized the attack. The set of Glee was bombed, and oddly garbed freedom fighters ran rampant through the backlots, setting fire to any documents that allowed Glee to use songs by anyone with actual talent and great hair. Needless to say, Glee can keep using Justin Bieber if it ever gets back on its feet—but no more Killers. No more classics. Never again. Oh, and they'll need a whole new cast, because everyone except the Very Potter Musical guy and the gay kid got murdalized.
The End.