Recently thought back to one of the episodes of The Powerpuff Girls I recall watching at least once on TV, and that's when I figured why not make a little parody fic, WarioWare-style?
DISCLAIMER: WarioWare Inc. and Kid Icarus belong to Nintendo; Bomberman is a property of Hudson Soft despite Konami's permanent takeover as of March 2012; Contra is owned by Konami; Disney owns Wreck-It Ralph (and Sugar Rush); and Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi belongs to Renegade Animation. All other video games and TV shows mentioned in this short fic are properties of their respective owners. The only characters I own here are as follows: Phoebe (9-Volt's best friend, formerly from Video Game Dream before she came to live next door to him in Diamond City), Arctic Bomber, Blaze Bomber, and Wario's two fraternity brothers, Billy and Sid (albeit mentioned briefly).
-Lying around the house-
Diamond City, a peaceful place amongst other cities in the United States, let alone California, has always been protected from all kinds of alien invasions and whatnot, thanks to the heroic Contras (Aaron, Ami, Bill Rizer, Lance Bean, Blaze Bomber and Arctic Bomber). One day, four of our young friends have gathered up at WarioWare Inc. after a big day in school: 9-Volt, Phoebe, Kat and Ana, to hang out while 9-Volt's mom was at work. They hoped the other members of WarioWare Inc. would show up, especially Mona, but apparently most of them were busy with their everyday routines. Wario, on the other hand...well, let's just say somebody's gotta protect his own business interests.
"So yer folks are busy, eh? Well, whaddya want anyways? I got some important business to take care of." Just then, a little white creature appeared out of nowhere.)
"Some pancakes would be nice," requested 9-Volt.
"Ehh, whatever tickles yer fancy, but you owe me 'cause I worked my butt off cooking them at the stove for an early supper, 20 coins each. Now if you'll excuse me, I have like 10 billion tons of work to do, so do whatever or skedaddle!" The creature became just a wee bit bigger as Wario left to...well, do stuff.
"Since when did he start charging us for eating whatever he bought for himself?" asked Ana.
Kat scoffed. "He loves money, what did you expect?"
Phoebe noticed something was amiss. "Hey...is that a TV dinner box with some lasagna he's got?"
"I guess so," said 9-Volt, "but my mom's cooking is way better any day."
"So's my king dad's. Anyhoo, might as well make ourselves at home since there aren't any new microgame demands."
A few minutes later, the four kids did something to pass the time as they didn't bring their 3DS's nor any of their games. First, Ana got out some crayons and paper from her backpack and drew a big, swirly red line across the papers until some of the crayon's wax ended up on the wall. Giggling excitedly, she continued her drawing activity until she noticed too late the mess she just made.
"Eep! Mr. Wario's not gonna like this...unless..." Ana pushed a big flowered pot to cover the spot, while hiding her crayons as best as she could. "Whew! Man, it's like rolling a cannonball around...Uh-oh, here he comes!"
"Almost forgot my Chuckola Cola," Wario said to himself, "'cause like Waluigi and my two fraternity brothers always said: never enter an online session without something really good to-HUH?! What's with all the crayons and stuff?!"
"Um...it's a hibiscus plant?"
"No no no, not that, little girl! The wall!" He moved the plant aside, exposing Ana's swirly line. "You know dang well my living room cost me a fortune after our first WarioWare game's success! Are you responsible for this mess?"
Ana gulped, and had to come up with an excuse, all the while unaware of the White Lie creature's presence in the house. "Um, well, I'm sure to the untrained eye, this drawing may seem like one of mine. But if you look closer, you'll see it's an obvious attempt at, erm, pseudo-impressionism, while I deal strictly in...lessee, what was that word...oh yes! Realism! Yeah, that's right!" She giggled sheepishly. "Bye!"
Just as the younger ninja twin ran off, the White Lie creature grew a little bigger again, snickering to himself quietly. Elsewhere in the house, Kat was playing catch alone by throwing a dodgeball to herself, pretending to be against herself as if to practice her agility. She continued throwing it back and forth to herself until she missed the ball and it crashed into a gold trophy nearby.
"Ugh!" whined Wario. "What is all the ruckus here?! Can't you see I'm-MY HALO MASTER OF 200X AWARD! Have you any blasted idea how extremely hard it was to win that trophy?!"
"I-It wasn't me," lied Kat. "That big red ball grew wings and flew outta my hands by itself, and I was trying to stop it! Bad dodgeball! BAD!"
The older ninja twin picked up her ball and ran away, leading the White Lie creature to grow bigger again, this time sporting a rather stocky appearance, his voice getting deeper. Wario, on the other hand, could only sit down and cry at his trophy. "Oh, my sweet little Halo Master of 200X award...I'm gonna find out whoever really did this to you, and they will PAY! I bet it's that conceited Jerk-O-Tron who kept sniping me with my pants down every chance he got!"
Later on, Phoebe was pretending to conduct a science experiment concerning the law of gravity. In an attempt to recreate Galileo's Leaning Tower of Pisa experiment, at least what Penny Crygor called it when she and 9-Volt asked her out of curiosity one time, the auburn girl borrowed two balls of different masses to drop from upstairs through an open window in a guest room: Kat and Ana's light blue bouncy ball, and Wario's 16-pound black bowling ball (obviously old and tattered as he hadn't been taking good care of it for a long time). She had to put on a pair of gloves due to the heavy weight on one of the balls, just so she wouldn't accidentally drop it on herself. Lining up carefully, she rolled both balls out the window simultaneously, not realizing the dropping point was directly above a bed of flowers.
"D'oh! I think the bowling ball smashed Wario's favorite bed petunias...I mean, I didn't do it!" She grinned sheepishly and backed away, while the White Lie creature grew again. "Guess I don't know my own strength sometimes..."
Not even 9-Volt, the usually honest one for a little boy at the tender age of 9, was exempt from telling a white lie. He was in the living room, but he was supposed to be doing his math homework for tomorrow. Instead, he put his stuff on a coffee table and turned on the TV to watch an episode of Sofia the First. Though it was typically meant for younger children, let alone girls, he was curious enough to see for himself why Ana liked to watch the CGI cartoon show, aside from certain other kid-friendly ones like Doc McStuffins or My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. But try as he might to focus on his homework, he was unable to turn his attention away from the cartoon, his imagination slowly but surely kicking in as he began to imagine the titular character tapping at the TV screen as if to talk to him.
"Excuse me, 9-Volt, but aren't you supposed to finish your homework?"
9-Volt gasped in amazement at the fact that he was indeed being spoken to, and by Princess Sofia of all people on TV. "Huh? Wh-what's going on? Oh, you mean my math homework? I, uh...I already finished it...right? Hee hee hee..."
"Are you sure you're telling the truth? Because it doesn't look like you're doing it right."
"But I am, see?" The boy turned his attention away to gather his thoughts. "Whoa, was I really talking to a cartoon character on TV, who just so happens to know my name? I gotta learn not to let my imagination run wild."
The White Lie creature, watching from a distance, grew even bigger as he chuckled to himself, waiting for the right moment to strike at the four kids as they continued lying around the house, ranging from eating someone else's chocolate bar, to gulping down almost an entire carton of strawberry milk, and to playing frisbee with Wario's "prized" copies of Call of Duty: Ghosts, Battlefield 4 and Madden NFL 15 for his X-Box One, all whilst lying about what they did. Finally, the White Lie creature, now an incredibly large monster about twice as large as themselves, revealed himself right before their very eyes!
"BLEEEEUUUUGH!"
9-Volt, Phoebe, Kat and Ana screamed in fright at the monster's surprise appearance as he swiped Ana's crayons to draw a big rainbow of swirly lines on the wall, merely representing what she did earlier.
"YEEEEEK!" shrieked Ana. "What are you doing?"
"Huh? I didn't do it. Bleh heh heh heh heh heh!"
The fat creature threw away the crayons and ran off to another room to throw a snow globe on the floor, breaking it instantly. He pointed and laughed crazily at the damage he just caused, right before the kids caught up to him.
"Hey!" accused Kat.
"Wasn't me."
The monster laughed again and ran all the way outside to the backyard, stomping on Wario's flower garden along with his prized bed petunias as the kids chased after him again.
"Stop that!" shouted Phoebe.
"Huh? Wasn't me."
Back inside Wario's house, the White Lie monster continued smashing things and denying everything he did, regardless of whether the kids were next to him or not. "Not me!" And he broke something else. "I didn't do it!" And again. "I dunno." And again. "They did it!" And again, much to the kids' panic at this point. "Wasn't me!"
The all-too-crazy chase ended right back where it started: the guest room with 9-Volt, Phoebe, Kat and Ana's school supplies inside; the White Lie monster had no intention of stopping there as he resumed running around on his smash-and-crash spree, still denying everything he does.
"Not me! Bleh heh heh heh heh heh! I didn't do it!"
Kat threw her hands up in the air childishly. "Ugh, this guy's crazy!"
Ana agreed, "I know, right?!"
"Homework sucks!" blurted the White Lie monster.
"We've gotta stop him!" stated Phoebe.
The White Lie monster lied again as he smashed yet another object in the room, "Not I!"
"But how?" added 9-Volt, tilting his head to the right in confusion momentarily. "Oh, I feel bad about lying to...you-know-who."
Ana wondered, "Who?"
Kat sighed. "It doesn't matter now, but to tell you the truth, I don't know how we can stop all this."
Phoebe gulped. "Besides, if my king dad were here and he found out..."
9-Volt joined in, "And my mom, too, if she were here...we'd be grounded for a month of no Nintendo, no Sugar Rush..."
The White Lie monster could be heard gloating again, "Phooey on homework! Bleh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh!"
"...No bowling, and especially no Bomberman," continued Phoebe. "I just know we'll be busted for sure! But...I also discovered the pattern to what that guy was doing..."
"And that is?" As Kat asked that question, the White Lie monster did a hip-drop on the bed.
"I dunno!"
But Phoebe ran up to the fat creature. "Hold it right there, mister! Your little game is over."
"Bleugh?!"
"I ate 9-Volt's Kit Kat bar!" To her and everybody else's surprise, the monster shrunk down a little. "Alright! It worked!"
9-Volt gasped. "So it was you, wasn't it?"
"Yes, 9-Volt, and I'm really sorry. I'll buy you another one, but more importantly, I've figured out that the monster is merely a manifestation of all our lies."
"You mean we gotta confess them all in order for him to go away? And do we also have to tell Pit and Phosphora what we learned today afterwards?"
The auburn girl nodded. "If they do show up later on and wonder what's going on, then yes. Just follow my lead, fellas!"
However, the boy suddenly thought of a different plan. "Wait! There's something I gotta do first before we confess to Mr. Wario! I hope that show's still on..."
And so, the kids grabbed the monster together and took him back to the living room whilst 9-Volt turned on the TV. Luckily, Sofia the First was still on and 9-Volt expressed his apology for goofing off when he was supposed to finish his math homework. Then he turned off the TV and went with his friends to the door leading to Wario's bedroom.
"Okay, was it really necessary to turn on that cartoon show?" questioned Kat.
"Hey, at least I like its concept!" argued Ana.
9-Volt, on the other hand, admitted his guilt. "I wanted to see why Ana likes Sofia the First, but then all of a sudden I imagined her talking to me and...and I felt awful bad about lying to her, so that's why it was necessary. Weird, huh?"
Kat gave her friend a stern look. "You lied to a cartoon character, much less a princess who's like two years younger than you?"
"Kat, Ana, calm down!" called Phoebe. "We all have weird imaginations sometimes, but that's because we're still kids. Now let's get on with our real task at hand."
9-Volt nodded. "Right! Hey, uh, Mr. Wario? Sorry to bother you, but we have something really important to tell you."
Wario's voice could be heard from the other side of the door. "Yeah!"
"I'll go first. I wanted to confess that it was me who drank out of the strawberry milk carton. Do you forgive me?"
"Yeah! Way to go, dudes!"
Phoebe stepped in to confess her lies next. "And I smashed your favorite bed petunias in your backyard by dropping your old bowling ball on it as part of a pretend experiment."
"Aw yeah! Killing spree!"
It was Ana's turn now. "I was the one who drew on the walls, and later slid down the stairway railing."
The White Lie monster shrunk down some more as Phoebe spoke again, this time to Kat and Ana, "And...well, I sorta took your big bouncy ball without permission to do that ball-dropping experiment."
Kat glared briefly. "I was wondering where it went!"
"I know, I know, and I'm sorry, too."
Wario called out again, "Wah, ha ha ha! Unstoppable!"
Then Ana continued to apologize. "I also snuck in and picked out your copies of Call of Duty: Ghosts, Battlefield 4 and Madden NFL 15 on X-Box One while you weren't looking..."
Finally, 9-Volt and Phoebe finished up in unison, "And we both took them outside and tossed them to each other like frisbees in a game of catch!"
The White Lie monster shrunk all the way back to his little self, and Ana said, "Guess that's that. We're all out of lies, except for Kat...c'mon, sis. You can do it! You gotta confess to Mr. Wario for us!"
"Oh, fine, party-pooper! I'm the one who broke your Halo Master of 200X award, I'm the one who ate the whole bag of Sun Chips, and I'm the one who left the toilet seat up! What? It's not always the men who do that, you know."
The creature shrunk again, but Wario instead groaned in annoyance. "Hey, will you noisy brats keep it down out there?! You know I'm very busy in here!"
But...uh-oh! "Hey, it grew again! Wait a minute...drat, the door's locked! But not for long!" Using the very edge of her sword as a key, Kat managed to unlock the door and Ana opened it up, revealing the truth about Wario: he was playing the recently-released Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare on his X-Box One almost all day!
"C'mon, just gotta keep it comin'...almost there...watch the snipers and hidden booby-traps. YES! YES! AW YEAH! We won! Wah, ha ha ha ha! Wonderful!" Kat and Ana swiftly turned off the surge protector connected to the TV and the game console, shutting them both off instantly. "Oh no...no...NOOO! What in the name of Zeus just happened?!"
The kids were not impressed, as Ana quipped, "10 billion tons of work to do today, huh?"
Then came Kat, "Not to be disturbed, eh?"
And Phoebe, too. "I worked my butt off cooking an early supper at the stove, hmm?"
Wario became defensive at their witty remarks. "Uhh, you're kinda starting to creep me out. I, erm, I-I-I...derrr, I don't like where this is going! Are you accusing me of lying?!"
9-Volt shook his head in disappointment. "We know you've done that before, but this is flat-out ridiculous! Phoebe?" Nodding in response, his best friend showed Wario the White Lie monster.
"WHOA! Wh-what on Earth is that thing?!"
Phoebe had a smug look on her face. "It's your little white lie, Mr. Wario."
"D'oh! If Mona finds out I lied to the kids, she's gonna blame me and take away all my Call of Duty games along with Mortal Kombat: Komplete Edition! Ohhh...oh, alright already! I didn't have 10 billion tons of work to do today, I didn't work my butt off at the stove, and...and...and I'm the one who left the toilet seat up! There, happy?!"
"Aw, man!" The creature finally disappeared after saying his last words.
"The white lie's gone!" cheered the kids. "Hooray!"
Wario picked his nose. "Ehh, just make sure it doesn't happen again. Now can we turn it back on? I have to get back into training for an online tournament that's gonna be hosted this weekend, and I wouldn't miss it for the world!"
In the end, the kids got around to cleaning up the messes they made around the house while Wario simply got back to playing Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare on his X-Box One. Afterwards, they got out a DVD from 9-Volt's backpack and tuned in to watch some episodes of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from the late 80s in the living room. Wario, on the other hand, stopped after another online match to get out something to munch on, when all of a sudden he heard a doorbell ring. He opened up the front door and saw Palutena greeting him rather sheepishly.
"Oh, it's you," said Wario. "Whaddya want?"
Palutena took a deep breath and explained as best as she could, albeit nervously. "Well, I just gave my speech up in Skyworld about how honored I am to be in the latest Super Smash Bros. installment and...um...I couldn't find Pit, so I figured I'd stop by since he knows 9-Volt and Phoebe, and..." She paused momentarily to let out a painful sigh. "He's probably hanging out with that stuck-up mistress of mischief again, but getting back to my problem...I need a little help...!"
As the Goddess of Light just described, a gargantuan White Lie monster was seen roaring out loud, ready to terrorize her temple up in Skyworld. Little does she know that only she can confess all her lies as it's the only way to defeat the monster, and yet she claims she never lies to anyone.
THE END
(Ending Credits)
Wario - CHARLES MARTINET
9-Volt - TARA STRONG
Phoebe - HYNDEN WALCH
Kat - GREY DELISLE
Ana - TARA STRONG
White Lie monster - KEVIN MICHAEL RICHARDSON
Princess Sofia - ARIEL WINTER
Palutena - ALI HILLIS
[End Credits]
Boy, that was sure fun. I had a good time writing this short fic, and I hope you enjoyed it!