"You must hate me... After what I did to you."
"I could never hate you."
"Stay with me."
"You know I can't."
It's been dark lately. Or maybe it was just him. Levi lay in his cold bed, not moving, barely breathing. A knock came at the door.
"You need to get up Levi. You can't keep living like this." It was Erwin. He always came around at this time.
"Fuck off." Levi spat out.
There was silence on the other side of the door, then the sound of footsteps moving down the hall. Levi sighed, sitting up. Erwin was right, he couldn't keep living like this, it wasn't healthy. But how could keep living after losing her? And yet she was still here with him.
He shut his eyes tight, trying to will away the feeling of her presence so close, as if she'd wrapped her arms around him.
"Go away." He mumbled softly. "You're not really here."
"You say that but you don't believe it."
Her voice sounded like it always did when she came to him. Strong, yet sweet and gently like honey.
"Look at me Levi."
He voice was so inviting and he found it hard not do as she had told him.
"No." Levi's voice sounded hollow and weak.
"Please?"
He broke. She was the only one that could break him, she always had been. When he's lost his squad she was the one who comforted him, who held him close to her and kissed his tears away and told him it wasn't his fault. She was the one that fixed his cravat after every hard battle that left him worn and ragged. She was the light that shined on him in the darkness that was this cruel world.
He stood and threw his arms around her, burying his face in her chest, searching for the gently thump if her heart. He was only met with silence.
"I miss you so much." His voice came out barely a whisper.
She ran her fingers through his hair soothingly, gently humming a song so old that the words were lost to him.
"I'm so sorry." The tears slipped silently down his cheeks. "I'm so so sorry."
"Don't cry my love, it's not your fault." She ran her thumb against his cheek wiping away a tear.
"But it was! I should have protected you!" He tightened his grip on her, afraid she'd slip away again.
"No it wasn't, your duty is to protect Eren, as was mine." She kissed his forehead sweetly, moving down to his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose, but never his lips.
"I want to kiss you again, like before." He mumbled, moving to connect their lips.
"No." Her voice came out firm, but laced with sadness that only he had been trained to detect. "No... You can't."
"You've come to me so many times now, why do you never let me kiss you?" Levi looked at her with pleading eyes, she staring back into his sadly.
"Because if I did, this illusion would be shattered." She smiled one last time before fading away. He grasped desperately at the thin air that had just been the woman he loved.
"Please don't leave me!" He sobbed desperately, wrapping his arms around himself. His mind was shattering, and he couldn't keep going like this. The memory of her was haunting him, and he simply couldn't take it anymore.
"I need you... Mikasa."