Mighty Boosh Fanfiction
Chapter 1
"Howard?"
Howard ignored him, and continued reading his paper.
"Howard? Howard? Howard?"
"Vince, if this is another stupid, pointless question, I may have to kill you."
"It's not! Why would you think that?" exclaimed Vince.
"Do I really need to explain? Anyway, what were you going to say?"
"Howard, it's getting pretty lonely around here."
"What do you mean? We've got each other."
"Exactly! We need someone else! We need to add another character to the mix."
"What, a lodger?"
"Not exactly…"
"A pet? Do you want a hamster, or something?" asked a perplexed Howard.
"A hamster? No, I don't like hamsters; they're really hard to dress up. They're like furry toilet roll tubes with toothpicks for legs. No, I was thinking of something a bit more human."
"So you do want a lodger then?"
"No. I thought that, maybe, we could get, you know, a kid?" Vince was looking at Howard earnestly. There was a silence.
"Are you joking, Vince?" Howard finally asked.
"No, I mean it! I've been thinking about it for ages, it'd be fun!"
"Vince, raising a child is stressful and expensive. Anyway, where would we get a kid from?"
"Adoption! Look, I've arranged for an appointment at an adoption agency for next Monday at 3, the address is on a post it note on the fridge. Will you at least give it a try?"
Howard said nothing, temporarily lost for words as a result of his friends out of character practicality. "Okay, then." He said, when his voice returned.
"Yes! Cheers Howard, you're a diamond!" Vince said, and ran upstairs to start designing outfits for their new addition.
Downstairs, Howard sighed. How on earth would they manage a child?