Title: The Gift of Love

By: EsTeLweNadia

Summary: AU – After the defeat of the Black Organization. Sometimes, the greatest gifts of love come in small packages. Shinichi/Ran.

Rating: Romance/Angst

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Detective Conan's cast. Though I wish that Kaito Kid/Shinichi/Heiji is mine. Too bad, right?

As always, comments and constructive criticism are immensely appreciated.

Go on… read…and enjoy!

It had been weeks since the final defeat of the dreadful Black Organization, and it had taken weeks for lives to get back to normal, or as normal as they could get. Despite everything, Ran still found it hard to believe that Conan had been Shinichi all along, that the one she was patiently waiting for, endlessly worrying about and ceaselessly missing, was right beside her all this time.

Sure, she had been angry. Even "angry" seemed too mild a word to describe it. The sheer agony of betrayal, of being lied to, it cut deep into her soul, and she saw red for a long time before rationality managed to push some sense into her, enough for her to realize that Shinichi had done what he had to, to protect them from the worst possible fate.

As soon as she emerged from the haze of her conflicting emotions, she noticed that Shinichi had gone strangely quiet and downcast, even more so after she gave him a cold shoulder. And a second realization hit; she wasn't the only one who was deeply hurt. Shinichi… her poor Shinichi. No wonder she loved him so much.

Because till now, even though Ai Haibara/Sherry/Miyano Shiho had teamed up with Japan's most elite scientists, the antidote for the accursed APTX 4869 still hadn't been ready. So the two shrunken adults remained… shrunken.

And once, she saw Shinichi longingly eyeing people his age, playing soccer. Long limbs infused with power, strength and speed. But what troubled her so was that she couldn't read his expression.

"I cannot give him any more of the APTX 4869 prototype antidote," Haibara had said when Ran had gone to plead her for it. Ran couldn't watch Shinichi being miserable with his child body. "His body is no longer strong enough to withstand the pain and the transformation. This time it will kill him."

There went her attempt to make things between them alright again.

Now that her Dad knew that Conan-kun was Shinichi, Shinichi had left the agency and back to his abandoned home beside Agasa-hakase. She paid him a surprise visit one day, only to find him sitting amidst the dark, dust and gloom, spectacles tossed carelessly aside, knees drawn up to his chest. He didn't even look up to acknowledge her presence.

"Shinichi?"

The miniature detective glanced away, not wanting to look at her, but Ran had been close enough to catch tear trails on his smudgy cheeks. Goodness, Shinichi had been depressed all this while, and she had been too mad at him to notice. Guilt rose to rear its ugly head, forcing her to swallow a sudden lump in her throat. No matter what had happened, he was still someone she deeply cared about, and seeing him like this, all her remaining anger just fell away.

"Go away, Ran," he croaked. "You shouldn't be here."

Ran approached him slowly, frowning. "I am not mad at you anymore, Shinichi."

And she was startled when he leaped to his feet, eyes welling with unshed tears, voice brimming with hate. "You shouldn't stop being mad at me. You should stay mad at me. You should HATE me!" Then his voice softened, "You don't deserve someone like me, Ran. You don't deserve a liar and a hypocrite like me."

It took all of her will NOT to rush to Shinichi and envelope him in a desperate hug. "I could never hate you, Shinichi."

"Even after all that I've said and done?" came the bitter retort. "I hate myself right now."

"Even after all that you've said and done," Ran affirmed, with a gentle smile. "There is no reason for you to hate yourself. Because no one hates you, Shinichi."

That's right. As angry and mortified as Dad was at Shinichi, he was begrudgingly grateful for the shrunken detective. Conan-kun had saved their lives countless times, had been there for them without fail, assisted in solving crime, brought joy and warmth to the family like no one could ever do. Ever since Conan-kun left, there was a hollowness, an emptiness in the family that couldn't seem to disappear.

The big throwdown with the Black Organization had been a secret to the world, and it was per Shinichi's request. So no one else besides the ones closest to him knew about the intense fight, and his fight against Death to get back to the living. And since he couldn't resume his life as Kudo Shinichi, he continued living as Edogawa Conan, only not living with the Mouris anymore.

All alone, in this huge, empty house… Ran felt sick inside.

"Shinichi…" She began, suddenly unsure of how to say it. She was the one who kicked him out of her house, in the first place. "Why don't you come to live with us again?"

Shinichi shot her a look of pure disbelief it was almost comical. "You're kidding, right?"

She shook her head. "No. Dad was the one who talked to me about it. We discussed for a bit last night, and he was worried about you living all alone here. Besides, he missed you. We both do."

Shinichi snorted sadly. "You don't miss me… you miss Edogawa Conan. I am no longer him. I can't be him, not after what had happened."

"You are still Edogawa Conan until Kudo Shinichi can return, for good," Ran reminded him gently.

A pained smile. "Not around your father. I'm sorry, Ran, but I can't go back. I'll just stay here… I'll be fine."

Ran knew that once Shinichi had made his mind, there's nothing she could do to change it. She got up and started hunting for a light switch. "Well, then, if you wanna stay here, then let's do some cleaning, shall we?"

Lights flooded the room, and Shinichi had to use his hand to shield his eyes from the sudden brightness. As soon as his vision had adjusted, he found Ran's dazzling smile. And he couldn't help but smile back at her.

"Let's do this."

Meet me in Beika Park at sunset.

Love, Ran

Shinichi grasped at the handwritten note, frowning to himself as he stared out at the horizon. The sun had set, cresting the sky with beautiful hues of orange and red, even with encroaching promise of darkness. The world had quietened somewhat, with everyone intent on going home after school or work to rest or enjoy before a new day began again.

He wondered why Ran had wanted to meet him here, of all places. Things between them were rocky, at best. Hesitant, tentative, unsure. Everytime he caught Ran having that wistful look on her face, he felt like he wanted to curl up somewhere to die. He hated himself for putting that look on her face, putting that pain in her life, putting her through all of it. It was his problem, yet he ended up dragging her in the situation and hurt her. It hurt him to see her like that, hurting because of him. He loved her so much, and yet….

Love, Ran

And yet, despite what had happened, she still loved him. Shinichi smiled sadly. Was he even worthy of her love?

"Shinichi."

That sounded like Ran… but it didn't sound like Ran. Startled, he whirled around, and went slack-jawed in astonishment.

"Ran!"

It was Ran, alright, but a much smaller version… a younger version of Ran. Slightly chubbier, with shorter hair and rounder face, but her eyes… held the wisdom, love, warmth and sadness that only the older Ran possessed.

"Ran… why? Why are you….? How…?"

Ran stepped forward, smiling gently. "I thought that since I couldn't get the antidote for you, I make myself smaller so you won't be lonely anymore."

When Shinichi continued to stare at her in complete bafflement, she took his hands in hers and explained the best she could. "I asked Haibara to give me one of the APTX 4869 drugs, so that at least, even though we are together… we are together."

"Ran…." The enormity, the sincerity of Ran's love had rendered him speechless.

"I love you, Shinichi," Ran said simply, staring into his eyes intently, "I can't bear to see you hurting because of something you HAD to do. I can't bear to see you still suffer from the cruelty of the organization long after they had been destroyed. I can't bear seeing you in pain of watching what adults can do while you are still stuck in that body. I can't bear seeing you so lonely. Alone in your pain. I want to be a part of it."

Shinichi's vision blurred. "Ran…" was all he managed before he pulled Ran into a tight and desperate embrace. "God, Ran, I love you so much."

Ran hugged him, burying her head into his shoulder, allowing her tears of happiness to flow, soaking into his shirt. "I know, Shinichi, I know. I love you too."

And that was the answer to his unspoken question – Yes, he is worthy of her love.

- The End -

That's it. *grins* I had enough of Shinichi trying and waiting to get back to his body, and hey, why not make Ran get to his level? To meet him halfway in his effort and become a couple, hmm…

Wondering if I shouldn't make this a one-shot… but we'll see. I need to keep those ideas coming. *winks*

Hope you've enjoyed reading. Thank you for your time, and reviews are very, very much appreciated.