Disclaimer - Is Kate still alive? Is Jen still alive? Is Roy still alive? Do you think I own it? (Hint: The answer is the same for all of them)
The arguing and pranks were a way to lift the mood. They were something relatively normal in a world of pain, suffering and the terrible things they witnessed each day. The laughter that lifted the tension; the lame jokes that chased away their frowns; and the looks that only they could decipher made them work. They were ways to survive; ways to live emotionally, to live in this confusing world, to live with the pain, to live with themselves, and to live with each other. To an outsider they may not appear close, until something bad happened, or someone said something ill of a team member. They supported each other 100, and through that, maybe because of that, they could all trust each other entirely – they proved that every single day. They were a team, sure, but they were more than that, they were friends, hell they were even a family. Maybe dysfunctional in the eyes of others, but to them this family was the most functional they'd ever had.
Tony finally found people who bothered to look deeper than his money and clothes and conquest, finally found people to worry about him and to really love him in a way he'd never been loved before. He was used to empty questions, fake smiles and hollow glances. But the team gave him more than that. They really cared for him, they worried. They could deny it all they wanted but Tony knew. That was why Kate had lied to stay with him when he had the plague, even risking infecting herself.
Ducky found people who actually listened to his stories; accepted him and his traditional ways. Even when they cut him off, Ducky knew they were thankful. They never asked him to change, rarely forced him to ignore his beliefs. They appreciated him and would do anything for him, as he would for them.
Gibbs found people to back him entirely, to risk their careers and lives to help him. And he knew that they all knew, even though they'd never dare voice it, he cared about them more than himself. He hadn't loved to often in life (he hadn't even really loved his 3 ex-wives) – he loved Shannon, Kelly, Jen; but aside from them, Gibbs tried to avoid love. However, this team, his next shot at "family" had found ways to heart and he really did love them, all of them. He was proud as he watched them grow and mature and suffer and rise and learn. He'd always be proud of them, and he'd always care.
McGee soon learned that Tony's way of calling him 'Probie' wasn't an insult, and although he was often the butt of Kate and Tony's pranks, they really did trust him and like him, and care. There was no particular reason Tony always played practical jokes on him, but it wasn't supposed to be cruel, it was funny. He wasn't quite as funny or free-spirited as Tony and Kate, but they still liked him. Tony and Kate had their moments, shared their jokes and smiles and cared about each other deeply. And once McGee had been jealous, but that was before he comprehended that that was just how it was. He had been the only one that Kate had trusted to tell about Ari, and he did feel privileged. McGee's parents had only really looked at his brains, only really cared for his grades, and being around people who saw both his brains and him.
Abby liked being around people who never tried to change her style, liked being able to speak geek and be understood. She loved the team so much; she'd simply be lost without them.
Kate was used to being teased, treated like a guy. But she'd never really had someone to go to spas with or stuff like that. She wasn't used to people at work throwing things at her, or smacking her over the head, but she'd never trade it for anything.
They loved and trusted and annoyed the hell out of each other, because they were family, and that's what family does. They'd always be there to support each other, and look after each other. They'd offer all the solace they could and give anything for each other. Because, for better and for worse, they loved each other. Forever.
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