AU, Kieron doesn't die fic, set 18 months forward from present day Hollyoaks.

A/N - Since I have no clue what John Paul is reading at HCC, I have him reading English.

Disclaimer - I don't own HO. Obviously.

-- Part 1; Wednesday --

Kieron Hobbs stared at his watch, willing the second hand to tick just a little bit faster. His lunch break, the half hour he spent ambling through the high street shops was passing far too slowly. It was always the loneliest point of his day, the time when he couldn't divert his mind onto his patients or football or drinking. It was the time of the day that he missed him the most.

John Paul McQueen stared at his watch, willing the second hand to tick just a little bit faster. This lecture, just before his lunch break was passing far too slowly. He didn't particularly care about 'cultural reproduction' or its relevance to Dickens's novels. He didn't particularly care about any of his lectures any more, especially those painful lectures he had to take about romantic fiction. In those books the couple always ended up living 'Happily Ever After.' But that hadn't happened for John Paul. He didn't even know where his love was. But that didn't stop him from missing him.

Kieron pulled the pint up to his lips and took the first sip of the evening. He smiled as he put his drink down; beer was always a relief for him. He was alone at that moment, although he wouldn't be later, his friends should be joining him before long. Football buddies he had met the first time he had entered this pub, eighteen months ago. Steven & Matthew would be here soon enough, they wouldn't have come straight from work, as he had done; they would have popped home, to see loved ones. Steven's missus and Matthew's wife and twins. Kieron had met them all, but he was the single one, and he never saw them unless he had a pint in his hand.

This Wednesday night saw his team playing in the Premiership, but it didn't matter who was playing. Football and the beer were simply distractions from normality, distractions from the emotions he kept bottled up inside. Loneliness mostly, and an overwhelming feeling of loss that he had never managed to overcome. Sometimes, when he was slightly drunk and feeling philosophical, he found it ironic that he was working as a counsellor when he himself could do with counselling. He had trained quickly in his new profession, gaining a qualification in a year, and he had been practicing, attached to a local university counselling service, for 6 months. The training had been a brilliant distraction; he had thrown himself into it and done well. Surprisingly well, he thought.

"Hey, mate, would it hurt you to smile?"

Steven had walked in and thumped Kieron on the back. He managed a half smile, glad for the interruption. If he had been left alone with his thoughts for much longer they would have turned to summer 2008 and that always left him glum.

"Another pint?"

Steven motioned towards Kieron's, now empty, glass, and Kieron nodded. He was never one to turn down a pint.

"Matt's late again." Kieron eventually initiated conversation, after his second pint was placed before him.

"Yeah, he'll miss the start of the game if he's not careful. Sue's probably making him do the dishes or something."

Kieron nodded. It was Matt's stock excuse – the missus.

"Ought to be a good 'un tonight."

Kieron nodded, although he wasn't sure who the Gunners were playing. But Arsenal always drew a big crowd in this area of North London – and tonight the pub was heaving.

"It better be. The Reds are going down!" Matt had finally walked into the pub, but it wasn't that that Kieron was focused on. The Reds. Liverpool FC. His team.

John Paul pulled the pint up to his lips and took the first sip of the evening. He was glad lectures were over for the day, it made the end of the day seem nearer. At least the footie tonight should keep his mind off things. He was, however, still sitting on his own in the Dog; Kris was halfway up the bar serving one of this years Freshers, an alright looking guy but far too full of himself, in John Paul's opinion. He thought Kris had already been there, but maybe he was wrong. John Paul was also waiting for Zac, still hanging around Hollyoaks almost a year after he had finally completed his course, and Malachy, with whom he had become mates, especially since Malachy spent so much time at the McQueens, were John Paul was still living. He had moved back 18 months ago, after he left, and he hadn't moved out. Yet. He really needed to, and soon. It might only be Mercy, Cala and his mum, but they were driving him mad.

Still, at least he had his football. Liverpool were playing tonight, and a good game, mates and a few pints were just what he needed to take his mind of things.

"You still moping?"

Kris was still as blunt as ever, and he was walking towards John Paul's, now empty, pint.

John Paul gestured for a refill, electing not to answer Kris's comment.

"He's not coming back, you know. You need to move on. Simon's available if you want. Good in bed to."

"Oh, because he wants your leftovers now. Give the lad a break."

Malachy had entered the bar, his usual jovial self. Kris simply sneered in reply, handed Malachy a beer, and walked down the bar to serve another customer. The Dog was quite busy for a Wednesday evening; punters eager to watch some football on the new screens.

"Good game do you reckon tonight?" Malachy asked John Paul. He wasn't entirely sure who the Reds were playing, but it didn't really matter anyway.

Zac, walking into the Dog, answered for him. "It better be. The Gunners are going down!" Zac had finally arrived at the pub, but it wasn't that that John Paul was focused on. The Gunners. Arsenal FC. His team.

Thanks for reading! The next chapter will be up soon.