Thoughts, Early Morning
*
They are more beautiful, Severus knows, than he has ever been, and will ever be. If he was an honest man, he would leave them. He can only harm them in the long run. If he was a good, true Slytherin, he would leave them. They can only hurt him in the future.
Severus has to wonder why he stays.
They are entwined together on the bed, sleeping still. Sunlight is filtering through the windows, promising a warm day. Severus can hear the castle waking up around them. In their room it is still quiet and peaceful, in the dream phase between sleep and waking, dreams and reality.
If Severus was a good man, he would leave them. They could be happier together, just the two of them, then all three of them will be. If he was a particularly proud man, he would leave them. They could break him easily.
This is not Severus's official room, but the fact that he is practically living here is the worst kept secret at Hogwarts. If Severus had any self-respect, he would leave them. This secret had made his students laugh at him for months. Severus knows the students still talk about it behind his back. The Boy-Who-Lived Romantically Involved With Not One, But Two Death-Eaters! Oh the scandal! The whole affair had given Minerva more openings to make jabs at him than any good Slytherin should offer a Gryffindor.
Part of him knows he should have stopped this long ago. The other, slightly more insistent part of him, knows he is too selfish to end it now.
They are stirring, no doubt awakening because his third of the bed has gone cold. If Severus wasn't selfish, he would leave them now, before they wake.
"Severus, what the bloody hell are you doing?" Draco has awoken fully, and, by speaking, has also woken Harry, who blinks blearily in Severus' general direction.
"Nothing, go back to sleep." they keep their voices muted, reacting subconsciously to the slowly waking day.
"You don't have to be up yet, it's way too early. Come back to bed." it is Harry's turn to speak, and he ends the sentence with a long yawn. Severus complies after a moment, because he is selfish, and he is a Slytherin.
Harry smiles sleepily and cuddles up to Severus, pulling Draco along with him. Harry lays his head on Severus's shoulder, and Draco nearly becomes a second blanket to Harry when he hugs him from behind, draping his arm over Harry's chest so that he can intertwine his fingers with Severus's on Severus's stomach. If he were a claustrophobic man, Severus thinks, he would have to leave them. He'd have panic attacks whenever they got into bed.
Harry sighs happily and says "I love you guys."
Severus can see his surprise echoed on Draco's face, until the blonde's face is transformed by a happy smile. "I love you both as well, Harry, Severus."
If Severus was any of the things he is supposed to be, he wouldn't reciprocate that sentiment, and even if he did, he certainly wouldn't put himself at risk enough to tell them.
"I must admit... I...love... you both...as well." Not exactly eloquent or exceptionally passionate, but it would have to do.
Perhaps, in the end, he did the right thing in not leaving before everything got more complicated.
Perhaps, at some point, the things you are no longer matter.
Fin