Spoilers: None.
Archive: Sure, just tell me where first (email: c_rossingjordan@yahoo.com)
Summary: A rather surprising turn takes place in Abby's new relationship, and Luka is the person she ends up turning to.
Author's Comment: My goodness.... It's been a while since I've written anything! A loooooong while. Anyway, since December 6th (National Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence Against Women in Canadaand the anniversary of the Montreal Massacre) is coming up, I'm dedicating this to all those who've suffered from violance, and especially the women who died in the Montreal Massacre on December 6th, 1989.
And thanks Kate, for beta reading.
Strong Enough To Be My Man
God, I feel like hell tonight
Tears of rage I cannot fight
I'd be the last to help you understand
Are you strong enough to be my man?
The streets were nearly dead because of the amount of snow. He watched outside his window at the deserted streets - flakes of snow coming down relentlessly, adding to the already full blanket covering the entire city.
His heart almost skipped a beat when out of nowhere, he saw something walk through the shadows and the snow. A little body wrapped tightly in a black jacket he knew could only belong to one woman.
"Abby?" Luka was at the door to greet her. She looked at him, a bit surprised, but mostly - just sad. There was a sense of mourning in her eyes that was more than unusual; it was frightening.
When she walked out of the shadows and into his apartment, he saw her
entire face - bruised and blood stained.
He had to fight just to keep the rage inside. He knew exactly who'd
done it to her.
Nothing's true and nothing's right
So let me be alone tonight
Cause you can't change the way I am
Are you strong enough to be my man?
"Luka…. I really…" Her voice was quiet and broken, barely getting the sentences out. "Really need a place to stay tonight."
"Of course," Luka whispered. "What…" He was almost afraid to ask. "Happened?"
Abby shook her head slowly. "Please… not tonight."
Luka nodded and led her to his bedroom. "I'll sleep on the couch tonight, I want you to sleep here."
"Luka, I can't kick you out of your bed." At that moment her nose started to bleed again and she groaned.
Putting his arm around her gently, Luka took her to washroom to help
her clean up. As she sat on the edge of the bathtub, watching him inspect
her face to make sure the jerk hadn't broken anything, Abby felt safe for
the first time in a while.
Out of instinct, he embraced her, wanting to be able to take away all
her pain, all the things she told herself in order to try to convince herself
she deserved no better than what Carter had done to her.
She didn't shrug his arms away.
Lie to me
I promise I'll believe
Lie to me
But please don't leave
The clock read 2:34 am by then. Emotional exhaustion was overcoming her more than anything else. She lay down on his bed, wearing his oversized cotton t-shirt (or at least, oversized to her) and boxer shorts.
"Anything you need?" He asked.
"No. Thank you, Luka." She looked up at him in the darkness.
"Call me if there is. Goodnight Abby," he turned to walk out, when she called after him.
"Wait…"
He turned around again, and knew exactly what she needed. Luka walked over to the bed and lay down beside her, gently touching her shoulder to comfort her.
The pain in Abby's body subsided, and she closed her eyes. Pain, hatred, sadness, were replaced with comfort. Alienation replaced with love.
I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
It's try and love me if you can
Are you strong enough to be my man?
"Breakfast?"
Abby shook her head, her eyes avoiding his. She seemed embarrassed. The walls she put around herself were put back up again, and Luka couldn't reach her. Not the way he could last night.
"I have to go, but… Thank you. For everything."
"You're not going back, are you? To… him?" Luka put down the pan he was holding and walked over to her. He put his hand on her shoulder and she gently shrugged it away.
"He made a mistake, Luka…"
"So you're just going to go back and let him do it again!?" His voice got stronger, and Abby flinched, frightened by it.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to raise my voice."
"It's fine." Abby went to put her shoes on. "Luka, look…" She sighed. "He's never done this before. He won't do it again."
"I'm sure Joyce thought the same thing." The room fell silent. Abby knew he'd bring that up.
"This is different Luka."
"No. It's exactly the same." He put his hand on her again gently. She didn't shrug it away this time. "Please, don't do this." He whispered.
"I'll be O.K."
When I've shown you that I just don't care
When I'm throwing punches in the air
When I'm broken down and I can't stand
Will you be strong enough to be my man?
Three months, and nothing like that happened again. Carter apologized over and over again. Abby accepted the apology. They went on. Luka went on.
It never really came to mind again, until the early May morning when he saw a familiar face as the paramedics pushed a woman in on a gurney, beaten.
"Abby…" He whispered in horror.
Lie to me
I promise I'll believe
Lie to me
But please don't leave