America:

Maxon quietly talked with Kriss beside me. I had never felt like this before. So. . . desperate. Even after Aspen left, I had a determination to get over him and show him what he had given up. But with Maxon I felt as if everything good had been sucked out of my body and in its place a black void of regret and despair.

I wished more than anything in the world I could go back to that night Aspen had came into my room the first time. To tell him he had lost his chance and that Maxon could make me happy. That he made me happy. And that even thought I hadn't loved him yet, that I would like to try. Then none of this would have happened.

Sure, Aspen might have been hurt, but no more than when he left me in our tree house. He would have been in no more pain than when he came to my house with the flowers. Or when I gave him his pennies back. It wouldn't have felt like this. Nothing short of dying felt like this.

Kiss let out a giggle and it felt like the knife pressing into my heart suddenly tore it open. When Maxon's warm chuckle followed I thought I might puke. I searched the room for something to take my mind off the soon to be engaged couple. I saw Celeste give me a supportive smile and I was glad for it. I continued and found Aspen along the walls of the room. He was dressed in the nicer version of his uniform and had a long staff in his hand as well as a gun in his holster.

I tried to get his attention but it was challenging without causing a scene. Even from the stage I could see the folded eyebrows of his confused face. He was looking around the room like so many of the other men in uniform, but he seemed to be trying to think of something. It was as if he was doing a puzzle in his head. Then it clicked. His face grew panicked and he yelled, "Rebels!"

A man who had just moved away from the wall, turned and fired and Aspen. Immediately, nearly half the guards took out red bands and tied them around their foreheads. I was stunned, even as I watched the guards turn their weapons on the imposters, nothing really processed. The rebels had once gotten into the palace. Anne had said it had happened once before, but I had assumed we'd be safe. Maxon said we'd be safe. I realized that the guards who were sent to our houses hadn't abandoned their posts at all. They were dead and buried, their clothes stolen and standing in front of us.

Not that this information did me any good now.

I turned to the elevated section where the royal family was planned to sit for the ceremony. I watched a handful of guards ushering them out of the room to safety. Guttural shouts of pain filled the room, adding to the cacophony of chairs screeching, bodies hitting walls, and the stampede of people trying to escape as fast as they could in their heels and suits. The men shouted as they fired, making the whole thing far more terrifying. I watched, stunned into a stupor.

Beside me, Maxon was trying to calm Kriss. "Get on the floor," he told her. "We're going to be fine."

I looked to my right for Aspen but he wasn't there. Searching the room I hoped he was okay. He had to be okay, he was smart, quick. He wouldn't let himself get hurt too badly. After years of watching him, I knew he could take care of himself. I had even sewn up a few of his wounds from picking, and winning, fights with guys much bigger than him.

I sat in my chair and watched the events unfold. It was scary. It was unbelievable. It was primitive. As Kriss let out another cry, I noticed a man walking through the crowd. I don't know what was different about him but it was like my mind knew he was important. Maybe it was in the way he walked or the fact that he looked purposeful instead of just another rebel shooting at the Palace occupants.

I knew that I should run, that Maxon and Kriss should run if they were going to make it. But I was frozen as the menacing figure raised his gun and directed it at Maxon. I looked up at Maxon, and he looked to me. I wished I had time to speak. I turned away, back to the man.

A look of amusement crossed his face. As if he suspected this would be much more entertaining for himself and much more painful for Maxon, he slid his gun ever so slightly to his left and aimed it at me.

I didn't even think to scream. I saw Maxon jump for me but felt the pain of the bullet first.

Maxon:

We hit the ground and for a moment I thought we were in clear. Then I heard my precious America moan in pain and my shirt side was suddenly soaked. No! I was too late.

I gently picked her up into my arms and ducked under the table. The white table cloth closed around us like a cave and shelled us from the brutalities of the ballroom. "No, no, no, America, you stay with me."

"Ma-ma-max-on," her broken whisper drove the desperation in my body further.

I cupped the side of her face. "It's me, darling."

She sniffled back a sob. "I'm s-sorry I hu-urt you. I l-love you so-o much."

"I know, Darling, I know." Another tear fell on her cheek but this one was mine. "I love you too."

"S-s-say it a-gain." She soft demand was as loud to my ears as the screaming of a jet.

"I love you, America. Break my heart. Break it a thousand times if you like. It was only ever yours to break."

Her shaking hand slid across my cheek and into her hair. The force was gentle. I feared it was all she could manage. But the request is clear. I pressed my lips to hers. And poured all the love and sorrow in my being into her.

When I pulled back she asked, in her broken way, "Can I ke-ep your le-etters?"

I tenderly stroked her face. Thinking of how I asked for them back not only 15 minutes ago. I was so angry. So wrong. I could never be happy without my America. "Yes." I pressed my lips to her forehead and vowed, "And if you live, I'll write you a thousand more."

"Did you wanted i-it Maxon?" I pulled back to look at her.

"Want what?"

"Everything. The white dress. The big tummies. The tiny feet. The little girl climbing into bed with us. The grey hair and the wrinkles?"

"I was about to ruin our lives, America. Yes, I wanted it. I want it." I pressed her hand to my chest. "And I'll give it to you. All you have to do is hold on a little bit longer," I begged. The world outside of our table fort was beginning to calm down, which meant either we were starting to win or everyone was dying.

The side of the table cloth was pulled up suddenly. "Your Majesty, the great room has been temporarily cleared of rebels, we need to get you to a safe room."

"No, lady America needs a doctor." He looked down at her in my arms, taking in the blood and her pail nature.

"But, Your Majesty," he started.

"I'm not leaving her , she needs a doctor or she'll die." He seemed to realize that she was the one I was picking. That she would be the future Queen. That this was the girl I loved with all my heart.

"We haven't done a secured search yet. There still may be rebels, but I don't believe they got as far as the Med-hall. We could maybe open the rooms closest to the hospital. The doctor should be in one of those."

"Thank you, sir." I started to move with her when she turned and puked. The sound of her weak retching threw me into urgency once more. Most of it was blood so it was obvious that she was bleeding internally as well; we needed a doctor. Now.

We took off down the hall but I didn't make it far befor America lost consciousness . . . and a pulse.

America:

I woke under the table, no longer in Maxom's arms. I said up, surprised to see the puddle of blood surrounding me. When I dragged my hand through it, it didn't get wet. Slowly, I crawled out from under the table in time to see Maxon's suit jacket fly out the door.

"Maxon!" I cried. "Wait!" He didn't. I took off running after him but stopped when I saw he was carrying someone.

For the ceremony, Kriss and I had been dressed in the same pale pink dress. He was holding Kriss. Getting her to safety as I bled to death under a table. The words of love he had just spoken were not real. Only kind words to a dying girl.

He would live a happy life without me. Without me, he would get all those things. Kriss would be the one to walk down the aisle to him. To learn his secrets. To make sure he didn't skip meals during work. To hold him while he slept. To lay in his arms for endless hours. To steal kisses. To have his children. To love and be loved by him.

I fell to the ground. He didn't need me. Didn't love me. He'll go on with his life and mine would end forever. And suddenly, I stopped fighting and let the darkness creep in.

.