This is going to be a lot of fun, as I got all these pairings off a forum deciding which
are the oddest pairings, however I will attempt to make them vaguely plausible.
( most of these are one-sided as some of these are pretty implausible
to start with.
Disclaimer:If you recognise it it's not mine.
Up First Are:
Fudge and Lockhart
Hermione and Umbridge
Dementor and Dementor
Fudge and Lockhart
Why Do You Always Seem To Smile Back?
Fudge sighed as he opened his copy of Witch Weekly a magazine he purchased
but for one purpose, he studied the face of Gilderoy Lockhart a young man who had women
swooning at his feet.
Fudge slowly reached for a bottle of firewhiskey the good stuff that burnt your throat
and clouded your thoughts. He was gay, he Fudge minister of magic liked other guys, well
actually not exactly other guys more like one guy. He had sort of always known it, when at
school he had a couple of girlfriends, more out of denial and a sense of duty then any actual
attraction.
Problem was Gilderoy didn't exactly like him back, it wasn't that Gilderoy particularly
disliked him, it was more sort of the fact that Gilderoy Lockhart had never actually met Fudge
at least not face-to-face. Fudge was old and balding, he had never been handsome, Fudge
knew this, he had known this for a good few years now.
Gilderoy Lockhart was young and handsome, he always had a smile, Fudge smiled
fondly at the photograph in the magazine and as always Gilderoy smiled back, but of course
Gilderoy couldn't see Fudge, Fudge knew this as well as anyone, but it couldn't hurt to dream,
to hope, could it?
Fudge hid his obsession he wasn't proud of it and never told anybody, imagine the
rumours, he had a reputation to uphold, afterall he was in charge.
Fudge smiled at the photo of Gilderoy in the Daily Prophet, he felt so...dirty but the
photos always made him feel better. He stared at the photo and saw one tear hit it, why
did Gilderoy always seem to smile back.
He can't hear you Fudge he thought to himself, he's destroying you and all he has to
do it sit there smiling, he doesn't care about you, you've never even met the bloke, with a
sudden cry of frustration Fudge seized the photos and threw them into the fire.
The fire consumed Lockhart, but he just sat there smiling in the photos, as the fire
burned and destroyed, but he just sat there smiling.
Hermione and Umbridge
Innocence Long Since Shed.
Umbridge watched the girl enter her class for their second lesson, the girl was quick
and clever, she could be useful if manipulated the right way. So many of her class were
innocent and ignorant, Hermione was different, Hermione was...strange.
Umbridge sparked off deliberate battles, she loved to make sparks fly, she loved
causing others pain, she was a sadist, Hermione raised her pain-filled eyes and met Umbrige's.
Umbridge turned away, Hermione hurt her, she hated Hermione, how dare she make her feel
guilty, how dare she.
Dementor and Dementor
Hidden Answers.
Dementors float together, have you ever wondered why there has never been a lone
dementor? Dementors are all connected, different yet the same, dementors don't know friendship,
but they feel companionship.
No dementor can have a single friend, they understand each other perfectly after all
how can you misunderstand yourself? Dementors cannot talk and neither do they need to, they
are one soul in many bodies.
Dementors suck away happiness sharing it between them, but how can they share it
seeing as they are one?
Dementors help each other unconditionally, is this love? How can it be love when they are
all the same, is it not just selfishness?
Okay I know these are kind of bad, but they were really hard to write.
Especially as the forum I got them from is specialising in couples that won't work.