Disclaimer: I own nothing.
This just came to the forefront of my mind and I had intended it to go another way but… it didn't. What fun.
This didn't actually happen so it's a kind of AU but still fun.
It's over.
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Ryan only knew that it had hurt. And it had hurt a lot.
Then again, having a nail shot into your eye is bound to set of a few nerves, right? As he laid there with Alexx attached to his hand offering soft reassurances and stroking his hair back against the grain (something that Ryan had to force himself not to comment on), he couldn't help but wonder just how his day off landed him in the hospital.
Scratch that thought, he knew exactly how he'd ended up in hospital after starting the day with the impending one day vacation. One word that split off into so many different directions… so many connections, so many reasons, excuses…
Delko.
Ryan closed his eyes as much as he could when the nail was out and turned his head away from Alexx as much as he possibly could… which wasn't very much.
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Ryan cringed as he walked into the Crime lab. He signed in, mumbled a faint 'hello' to the receptionist and continued walking. He made a beeline for the evidence locker and only offered Boa Vista a blank look when she tried to talk him into going out for a drink to 'cheer him up'. He pulled out the evidence boxes to all his open cases and checking the work load on the other CSI's, he signed each and every one of them over, putting notations down next to each one. When he was done, he signed a few necessary forms and put the evidence boxes back, knowing that Calleigh, Horatio and Frankie from nights would call him to get personal information on each of the cases.
He left the evidence locker without a backward glance at the confused Boa Vista and made his way to Horatio's office, knocking once and entering when he heard a 'come in'. He stiffened when he saw that Delko was sitting in a chair facing the lieutenant but ignored him and walked over to Horatio's desk.
"I just came to give you this," he handed over an envelope addressed to Horatio with the words 'Formal Resignation of Ryan Wolfe' beneath the name. The redhead read the notation and let his eyes flicker to Erik, gesturing the Cuban to leave them alone for a few minutes and without a word to either man, Delko got up and left the office, closing the door behind him.
"Ryan…" Horatio began, staring at the letter in his hand. "Ryan I can't accept this." He looked up when he heard a muffled snort, eyebrow raised.
"That's funny, because I can't accept it either," the man said with a self-deprecating grin. "I can't accept the fact that on my first day off in two months, I ended up in hospital with a nail in my eye. I can't accept the fact that the reason I am in the situation I currently am is standing outside this room probably listening in to this conversation." Right on cue, Horatio's eyes narrowed slightly.
"Mr Wolfe-"
"No, Horatio. I know exactly what's going on in Delko's life at the moment."
"I don't see how you can possibly know that kind of information Mr Wolfe," Horatio said, his voice harder than it had been a few minutes ago.
"Well, considering the fact that my sister was in the same predicament his sister is in, you're 'I don't see how's' are pretty redundant. No," he said when Horatio was just about to speak. "No excuses, no 'he was under a lot of strain', no nothing. Since I first started here at CSI, my mother died from breast cancer and a year ago, my sister was diagnosed. Now I admit everyone handles situations differently but Delko not only broke the law, but got away with it and still managed to keep his job. I didn't break the law, I didn't buy drugs to help my sister or anything like that… all I did was turn up to work on my day off because Delko had 'somewhere else' to be. It was his call, his scene."
"So you think it should have been his eye that was injured?" Horatio's tone was softer now and more than a little sympathetic.
"What? You think I'm that shallow? No, I don't think that. I'd much prefer no one to have been injured but life doesn't always go along with personal preferences."
"Ryan, I understand your anger at the situation but resigning is not the answer."
"Yes, it is. I appreciate that his sister is sick, I really do. My mother's dead, my sister… I get where he's coming from. But he broke the law Horatio. He wasn't even penalised. Jesus," he turned away, laughing at the absurdity of the entire show. "Have I ever not turned up to a call?" Not waiting for an answer, Ryan went on. "No, I haven't. I've turned up to each and every call I've had and I've taken at least three of his when he wasn't 'available'. There is no way on this earth that that can go unnoticed by you. In fact I distinctly remember mentioning it to you, and receiving assurances that you'd sort it, you'd talk to him."
"Ryan-"
"Wolfe, you got something to say to me, then say it to my face." Erik stalked into the office, the door closing soundlessly behind him.
"I have absolutely nothing to say to you Erik," Ryan said and turned back to Horatio. "I have signed over all my active cases and made notations on the log in the locker. My contact information is still in the system. That," he pointed to the letter on the desk. "is effective immediately." He then turned to walk out of the office, stopping when Horatio called his name again
"I told you that I am not accepting it." Ryan shook his head and turned around, a pained smile on his face.
"You haven't got a choice Horatio. I've sent a copy to the Chief along with a copy of my most recent medical records. A copy of the relevant information is in there for you to read too. I'm blind in my right eye, H." he said quietly. "Regulation states I can't even work in the lab anymore."
"Wolfe…"
"I assigned Frankie from nights the Finchley case, Horatio. So if you want to check up on that, than you'll have to contact him." Then without another word, he left the office. Both Horatio and Erik watched the former CSI walk down the steps and bump into Alexx just as he was about to leave.
They saw the pair exchange a few minutes worth of conversation before Alexx pulled the man into a long hug before releasing him and watching him leave.
Horatio sighed and opened Ryan's letter of resignation. After reading the obligatory speech, he moved to the personal note at the end.
H,
I can't
thank you enough for giving me the chance you gave me.
To be a CSI.
God, it had been my dream for I don't know how many
years. It
actually sucks a lot of bad things to see my career end the
way it
did but there's nothing I can do about it now. I'm angry at Erik
and I'm angry at you… hell, I'm angry at everyone and
everything.
I
haven't mentioned, and I know for a fact that I wouldn't mention
it
face to face but I feel like you have to know that on my day off,
when
I got shot, my sister passed away. She was with our father, my
aunt
and my younger brother and I know she understood my job and my
responsibilities, she told my family to make sure I knew that she
didn't
blame me for not being there with her but you don't just
let something
like that go, do you?
I had
planned to spend the day with her but events turning out like they
had didn't permit it and I only found out when I got home that
night.
The funeral was last Wednesday, Alexx came with me. I can't
get over
how much she reminds me of my mother, it's weird. Speed
once told me
she could mother the most stubborn of us all and I think
now I completely
agree with him.
Sorry,
you never knew. Speed mentored me in criminalistics while I was on
patrol. I met him at one of his seminars and we never lost touch. He
said,
and I quote, "H'd love to have you on the team. Delko and
Calleigh would
just love to have a new edition to tease and Alexx…
well, Alexx would adopt
you straight away."
It's a shame things didn't work out right, isn't it?
Anyway,
I apologise for going on and on. Thank you for the experience
your
decision to hire me provided and I learned to look at things from an
entirely different perspective. And don't worry about what I'm
going to do
with my life now… I never really needed to work in the
first place. I just
wanted to do something that would make a
difference, I wanted to help
people and I think I managed that at
least a little.
Thank you for everything H,
Ryan Wolfe.
Horatio closed his eyes and uncharacteristically slumped back in his seat. He let Erik take the letter and read it, hearing the expected curse when the Cuban had finished.
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Written by Messrmarauder