1. First Steps

Aki had only been a doctor for a few months, and while she wouldn't trade it for the world, there were days that she wished would just end. It was four in the afternoon, schools had just let out all across Germany and the waiting room was packed to the gills. That combined with a call to Japan that had run far too long last night, and Aki was about ready to throw in the towel. And the evening rush hadn't even started yet.

Good thing this wasn't her practice. Dr. Sofie Adelberg had been one of the few doctors willing to hire her after she graduated. Her grades had been top-notch, but her German still bore marks of Japanese and it had put off more people than Aki liked to think about. Dr. Adelberg was still seeing the majority of the patients who came to the joint practice. Today, all Aki had seen were children.

She liked kids, she really did. She'd helped Crow with his kids more than once in the nebulous period after the WRGP but before she left for Germany. But it was winter and flu season, and so far, almost half of the kids she'd seen had cried. Either when she'd checked up on them, given flu shots to the ones who needed it, or, on one memorable occasion, the moment she'd shown her face in the waiting room. How Crow had managed to take care of so many kids in far worse circumstances, she'd never know.

"Mrs. Spach, as I told you yesterday, flu is a viral infection. Antibiotics will be entirely useless."

On the other end of the line, Mrs. Spach's voice grew exponentially louder. Aki rubbed her temple and held up a finger to the people sitting in her office: a young woman and her daughter, maybe twelve at most. The girl looked increasingly agitated, messing with the hem of her yellow skirt. Aki could only hope she was too old to be the next crier of the day.

"I understand that your job is important, yes. Unfortunately, I can't do anything I haven't already done. I— Yes." Aki did not roll her eyes. That would be unprofessional. "Yes, of course, I'll transfer you to Dr. Adelberg. Have a good day, Mrs. Spach."

She pressed the transfer button with rather more force than strictly necessary and hung up, taking a moment to breathe. Then she looked up and smiled. "Sorry to have kept you waiting. What can I do for you today?"

The girl fidgeted in her chair. Her face had paled, making her dark eyes stand out all the more. Her mother nodded at her. Aki leaned forward.

"What's your name?"

"Esin," the girl said.

"Esin." She really hoped she was saying that right. "What's the problem?"

Esin clamped up, shoulders drawn tight, hands again clutching the hem of her skirt. "This is ridiculous," she muttered in the general direction of her knees. Her mother sighed.

"I'm sorry, doctor," she said. "Esin's been having a tough time lately."

"It's not a problem, ah—"

"Asli. Asli Ylmaz," Esin's mother said. Aki nodded. A cursory computer search told her that the Ylmaz family had been seeing Dr. Adelberg for several years already. No explanation for why they had chosen Aki this time; neither Esin nor Mrs. Ylmaz looked ill.

"Esin's been very angry lately," Mrs. Ylmaz said. Esin rolled her eyes in the true fashion of teenagers everywhere. "My husband and I thought it best to ask for your advice."

Aki frowned. "I'm no psychologist, but if you're willing," she looked at Esin, "I can recommend some of the psychologists we work with. They specialize in anger issues, so it might be helpfu—"

"She blew up the microwave," said Mrs. Ylmaz.

Well. Aki hadn't taken the girl for someone so violent. "Did you set it on fire?"

Esin groaned. "I didn't touch it, okay? One moment it was there and the next it wasn't. How is that my problem?"

Oh. Oh.

Of all the doctors Mrs. Ylmaz could have chosen to take her psychic child to, she had to choose the one who was psychic herself. At least Esin had only blown up a microwave. Better than setting the house on fire. Aki steeled herself. She was a professional. She'd long ago come to terms with her psychic powers. Every once in a while, when a patient wasn't getting better fast enough, she'd even surreptitiously use her healing powers to give them a little boost, nothing more. She could do this. Probably find someone better suited to help Esin too.

But now Mrs. Ylmaz was shifting in her seat. She met Aki's eyes and quickly glanced away again. Esin sat in stubborn silence, all her attention focused on her left shoe. What was going on here?

"Doctor Izayoi, I haven't been entirely honest with you," said Mrs. Ylmaz. "Before Esin blew up the microwave… there have been other accidents. Smaller. We believe she may have, ah, psychic powers."

The words sounded strange and awkward in German. Aki managed to suppress her flinch. They didn't know. How could they?

"Psychic powers, Mrs. Ylmaz?"

"See, told you she wouldn't believe it," Esin said.

Oh, but she did. Now that she was actually concentrating, she could feel Esin's power. Unpracticed, unrefined and not nearly as strong as Aki even without her Signer mark, but undeniably there.

"My husband and I are fans of Duel Monsters," said Mrs. Ylmaz. She folded her hands in her lap. "We followed the World Riding Grand Prix, so when Dr. Adelberg announced you'd be joining her practice, we recognized your name. I mean, we thought it had to be someone else with the same name at first, because why would you be in Germany—"

"Exchange student," Aki said absently.

"Right. We were a bit shocked to realize it really was you."

That still didn't explain why they were here. Mrs. Ylmaz didn't look like she wanted an autograph, and the WRGP was long behind her and she had only ever dueled once anyway. In hindsight, the whole thing had been overshadowed by what had come after. She thought of Bruno with a brief pang. She'd only known him for a year and a half and they had never been all that close, but the loss still hit her at unexpected moments.

"I'm flattered you remember me, but my teammates did most of the work." She could have gone pro; she had been scouted after the events on the Ark Cradle. But she liked this a whole lot better and she still met some of her old classmates every month for some impromptu duels.

Mrs. Ylmaz glanced at her daughter. "We enjoyed watching you duel," she said softly. She squared her shoulders. "But that's not— There was a video, from before the WRGP. At the opening gala, when they were announcing it."

The opening gala? That was when they'd met the mysterious duelist—Bruno. Because they were chasing that guy who'd crashed through the window and—

Aki blanched. She'd summoned Black Rose Dragon at that gala. She'd known there was footage, but she'd never expected people in Germany to have seen it. If Mrs. Ylmaz had seen that, then she'd brought her daughter here to… What? See what a psychic looked like in real life?

"I see," she said. She didn't really, not yet, but Mrs. Ylmaz had apparently seen her summon Black Rose Dragon and she wasn't calling her a witch or threatening her job yet. "You've seen me summon…"

Aki trailed off. Mrs. Ylmaz nodded. "I know it's not your job, doctor, but we didn't know where else to go and no psychologist would have believed us."

She had a point. Psychic powers weren't exactly part of the curriculum. Aki glanced at Esin. The girl looked like she'd rather be anywhere but here.

"It's been a long time since I've truly used my powers, Mrs. Ylmaz", she said slowly. No use in denying she had them; the evidence was irrefutable. "I'm not sure what you expect from me."

"So this is real?" Esin cut in. "It's not just some crazy thing mom and dad found on the internet?"

"It's real."

"Prove it."

"What, now?" Right here, in the middle of her office?

"Esin!" Mrs. Ylmaz hissed. "I'm sorry, doctor, of course you don't need to. There's no doubt, we wouldn't have come if we didn't believe—"

But Aki took in the shifty look in Esin's eyes, the way her jaw clenched and her hands clung to the side of her chair. She didn't have to prove anything. She was a doctor, she hardly had to listen to a twelve-year-old. But Esin needed reassurance. She needed to know she wasn't alone in this.

Aki wordlessly got up and locked the door. She closed the blinds covering the wide window, then unlocked the top drawer of her desk. Her deck was a warm weight in her hand. She didn't have the talent for seeing spirits that Ruka had, but she could see her own monsters after years of practice and she had summoned them so often that their presence had become familiar. Had she wanted a display of power, she would have summoned Black Rose Dragon, but that wasn't the point of this demonstration and she liked the room intact.

Esin was following her every move. Even Mrs. Ylmaz looked cautiously excited. Aki shifted through her deck until she found the card she wanted and put it on her desk, in front of Esin and Mrs. Ylmaz.

"This is Blue Rose Dragon," she said. "I'm going to summon her. She's not very large for a dragon but her wings are wider than they look in the picture." She held her hands apart to demonstrate. The last thing she needed was for Esin or her mother to overreact and alert everyone in the building. Even if they were okay with the concept, they wouldn't be the first people to panic when seeing the evidence up close.

Esin and her mother nodded. Aki closed her eyes and took a deep, steadying breath. It had been years since she'd summoned a monster in front of other people. But the power came to her immediately, and she materialized Blue Rose Dragon with barely a move of her hand.

"Wow," Esin whispered. Blue Rose Dragon flapped her wings, scattering some of the papers on Aki's desk, and did a curious tour of the room, cooing happily.

"Hush," Aki told her. Blue Rose Dragon landed on her desk and Aki shoved her chair backwards, making room. The dragon took the invitation and curled up in her lap. Aki had spent more than one winter studying with one of her monsters next to her, whenever it got cold and the heating refused to work again. Her classmates had been amazed by her refusal to buy a space heater.

"This is one way to use psychic powers," she said, scratching between the dragon's wings. Blue Rose Dragon's head swiveled from Esin to Mrs. Ylmaz. Esin looked amazed. For the first time since she'd entered the room, some of the tension had drained from her body. Mrs. Ylmaz leaned forward, eyes sparkling.

"I can do that?" Esin asked.

"It takes some practice. Most psychics start off like you do, by accidentally blowing things up." That had been the common thread in all of the stories of the people who were part of Arcadia. Microwaves, phones, computers… Aki had been the only one who had managed to set an entire mansion on fire.

"Can you teach me?"

… What? No, that hadn't been her intention at all. She'd just wanted to show Esin that psychic powers were real and that they could be controlled. She was no teacher. She'd never taught anyone anything and she didn't have the patience for it. There had to be someone else who could help Esin.

But the girl was staring at her in such awe, and Mrs. Ylmaz looked at her with ill-concealed hope. Aki wrapped her arms around Blue Rose Dragon. The dragon nuzzled her hand.

"I'll— I have to think about it."

Esin opened her mouth to protest, but Mrs. Ylmaz nodded. "I understand, doctor. Please let us know when you come to a decision."

They left soon after, having exchanged phone numbers with Aki. The door was unlocked now, and anyone could come in, but Aki still spent another five minutes just holding Blue Rose Dragon before she could gather the courage to dismiss the monster and call in her next patient.

oOoOo

"Why can't you?"

"I've never done this before. I don't even know where to start!"

Ruka, on the other side of the screen, leaned forward. "I'm not saying you have to, but is there anyone else who could help her?"

"There has to be someone else." Aki knew she wasn't the only psychic duelist on the planet. With Arcadia disbanded, she'd lost contact with everyone in it, and most of its ex-members would consider her a traitor anyway. But Arcadia didn't contain all the psychic users on the planet. Not even in Japan. "Don't you know anyone?"

"People like me are more common than people with your powers, nee-chan," Ruka said. "Johan Andersen does a lot of work with people who see spirits."

"Andersen?" She'd heard that name before, she was sure of it.

"A friend of Yuki Judai. We've been in touch."

Oh, Yusei had talked about him once, a long time ago. "You think he could help Esin? Where does he live?"

Ruka made a face. "Norway. And like I said, he works with people who see spirits. Does she see spirits?"

"I don't think so." Aki deflated. "He really only works with spirits?"

"Only spirits." On the other side of the screen, Ruka glanced over her shoulder and smiled at something. Probably one of her monsters. Even though Aki could see her own monsters, seeing other people's monsters was generally beyond her.

"There's got to be someone else, though." Divine had managed to set up an entire organization, with teachers and everything.

"People with psychic powers haven't been very popular lately." Years ago, Ruka would have been hesitant to deliver such a message. Not anymore. There was no malice in her voice, just a simple statement of fact. And she was right. It was why Aki kept her powers a well-guarded secret and barely ever used them outside of the sanctity of her own home. The video of the WRGP was a problem. She'd need to ask Yusei to scour it from the internet.

"She'll need to be able to control her powers if she wants to live a normal life." Aki groaned. Her own name was widely associated with psychic powers and her tenure as the Black Rose Witch had earned her suspicion that even the Izayoi name couldn't clear. It had been part of the reason why she'd moved to Germany. So far, Esin had only used her powers in front of her parents, who had been a lot more accepting than Aki's own. But it was only a matter of time before she slipped up and used them at school or with her friends. Aki could all too well imagine the damage that might do to the girl's life. She needed some form of control, and fast.

Aki glanced at the screen, where Ruka was watching her carefully. "I… guess I should teach her the basics," she said. "Just until someone better comes along. So she won't slip up in public."

Ruka smiled. "You'll do great, nee-chan."

oOoOo

Aki had never taught anyone in her life. Too unpredictable, too volatile, not good with people… The closest she'd ever come was helping the twins with their homework, and Yusei had done more of that when he didn't even go to their school. So why was she standing here, in the barn Esin's parents owned, on a Saturday evening? Why was there a twelve-year-old staring at her expectantly? Why did she ever agree to this?

Her parents would probably chew her out if they ever found out she was doing this, but honestly Aki was more afraid of anything she could do than anything that could happen to her. At least if she hurt someone now, she could heal them right away.

"Doctor Izayoi?" Esin asked. Aki swallowed and tried to relax. She could do this. She wasn't supposed to teach Esin how to summon dragons and lay waste to buildings. She only needed to show her how to keep her powers under control.

It was only the thing she always had the most trouble with.

"Right." How did this go again? How had Divine taught her? He'd mostly made her duel, but Esin didn't duel. Besides, Divine's goal had always been to strengthen her powers, not control them. The very basics, then. "Has anything happened since last week?"

Esin shook her head. "Not really. I feel it sometimes, but it's under the surface. Buried."

So Esin could feel her own powers? Aki re-evaluated her earlier opinion: the girl might be more powerful than she'd initially assumed. It usually took people a while to get a conscious feel for it. Many never succeeded at all.

"Can you feel it now?"

Esin closed her eyes. After a few seconds of scrunched-up eyebrows, she carefully nodded. "It's… like smoke. I try to grab it, but it always slips through my fingers."

Aki's powers had never felt like smoke. They were fire, now just a warm presence in her soul, but once an all-consuming force that had threatened to burn her up if she couldn't keep it tamped down. Smoke seemed like a far better alternative for a child like Esin.

"Keep your eyes closed," she instructed softly. "Where do you feel it?"

"… My stomach."

"Breathe. Let it fill you. Four seconds in and seven seconds out. Count with me." She counted slowly, holding her breath on four and letting it out again. Esin followed her example, a bit halting at first, but more natural with every subsequent iteration. Her body moved with her breaths, head lifting on every inhale. "Good. Feel it spreading to your arms, to your legs. Can you feel it?"

Esin kept breathing, fingers twitching. She only gave the barest of nods.

"Very good." Aki paused to gather her own thoughts. Usually, this would be the point where Divine would tell her to bring her powers out, destroying whatever object he'd brought this time. But her aim wasn't to teach Esin how to destroy. She needed to learn control.

"Let it spread to your fingers. How does it feel?"

"Kind of tingly."

Better than a force completely out of her control. Aki took several deep breaths herself. Her own power lingered under the surface, more volatile than it had been in a long time. She had to stay calm. Divine was gone and she could do better than him. She wouldn't teach Esin how to fight. The girl hadn't hurt anyone yet and if it were up to Aki, she never would. She coaxed the flow of power into slowing and retreating back to the pit of her stomach, where it nestled, once again contented, like a little flame.

"Power wants to be used," she said, almost a whisper. Power wants to be used, Divine had said, and aimed her at the duelist on the other side of the field. It wants to be free. Let it.

But that hadn't been true. It had taken her until the Ark Cradle to find out what it really wanted.

"Power wants to be used," she repeated. "It wants to be useful to you."

"What does that mean?" Esin opened her eyes a crack and looked down at her hands.

"It is a part of you and it wants to be accepted. Let it."

Her powers hadn't wanted to destroy any more than Aki wanted to. They wanted to be a part of her. They wanted to be her hands and her eyes, to help her face the world around her. All the years she'd spent alternating between fear and anger had made them an uncontrollable force. Only when she'd stopped seeing them as something strange had she been able to guide them towards a better purpose.

"Your powers will react to uncontrollable emotions instinctively. Anger, sadness, fear… It's very easy to use them to destroy."

"Is that why I blew up the microwave?"

"Yes. You're not the first person to do so. But you have to keep it in check even when you feel hurt. Can you still feel the energy?"

Esin nodded.

"Try to bring it back to your stomach."

Esin's forehead furrowed in concentration. Her breathing sped up; her hands clenched. Aki frowned.

"Slow your breathing. Count to four."

"It doesn't want to go back," Esin said through gritted teeth.

Aki's power used to burn through everything. Her hands, her eyes, all the things and people around her. It had summoned her monsters for her and made them attack before Aki had had any conscious say in the matter. It hadn't wanted to be locked up deep down in her soul. Forcing it to had hurt, so in the end Aki had stopped bothering.

"Don't force it. Guide it back to where you want it to be. It wants to be useful to you."

Esin's breathing didn't slow. The light flickered. Aki threw a worried glance at the ceiling. Would Esin be strong enough to bring the building down? She took a few steps forward and carefully reached out.

"Esin. I'm going to touch you."

Esin gulped in a huge breath, eyes focusing on Aki. The brown of her irises had taken on an unnatural shine. Aki schooled her expression and put a hand on the girl's shoulder.

"Focus on my hand. Can you guide your power there?"

Slowly, carefully, she felt the energy in the girl's body shift. She probed just slightly with her own power and felt the new power respond. It needed guidance. It wasn't sure whether Esin could give that guidance yet.

"Have faith in it," she whispered. "It is a part of you and it doesn't mean you any harm."

The lights flickered again. But slowly, ever so slowly, she felt the energy flow lessen. Esin's hands unclenched. She sat down on the ground and Aki followed.

"Good. You're doing great, keep going."

And finally, with the slightest of nudges of Aki herself, Esin brought it under control again. Aki could feel the power radiate off her, but calmer now, less likely to lash out. It settled near the core of the girl's body, contented. Esin let out a massive breath and fell back on the floor.

"It's back," she said. "It's smoke again."

Aki sat down next to her. "You did great." She smiled. "If you keep that up, you'll be in full control soon enough."

"Is it always so exhausting?" Esin looked like she desperately needed a nap.

"In the beginning, yes, but it gets better. It's… like an extra limb. At first, it's completely new and weird, but the longer you use it, the more comfortable it becomes, until it's like it was always there."

Esin raised herself up on her elbows and met Aki's eyes. "Doctor, what can you do with psychic powers? You can summon monsters, but I don't have a deck."

Aki flinched. For years, she'd thought her psychic powers were only good for destruction and even now, the only psychics she could remember would destroy more often than not. Her healing powers were a closely-guarded secret; she didn't want anyone to accuse her of having come by her title of doctor unfairly.

"Psychic powers are…" She struggled to find the right word, "versatile. But because they're so easy to use when you're angry or afraid, most people think they can only be used to destroy. Some people summon monsters, like I do. Or you can use them as an extra power boost. Very good for assembling furniture." She smiled. Putting together her desk at home had been a particularly frustrating experience. It still bore the marks of when she'd been just a bit too forceful trying to hammer down a very stubborn nail.

"You mean like superpowers?"

Aki smiled. "A bit like that, yes."

"That's so cool," Esin whispered.

"Don't use them on other people unless you know what you're doing," Aki warned. She glanced at her phone. Almost nine. Esin didn't have school tomorrow and Aki didn't have to go in for work, but still it would be better if they wrapped up for the day. She got up and reached out a hand to Esin.

"You did very well today," she said, pulling the girl up. "Keep track of your power, but maybe don't try doing what we did today on your own just yet. We'll work on your control next time."

Next time? When she'd arrived here an hour ago, she had been ready to abandon the whole endeavor altogether. But Esin's progress was encouraging. Aki wanted to see what she could do with full control.

"Next week?" Esin asked.

"We'll see." When Esin's face fell, Aki gave her a quick smile. "I might be busy next week, but I'll call your parents when I have time. Okay?"

Esin contemplated her hands, then nodded decisively. "Okay."

Notes:

This fic starts a couple of months before Shining Light, which can be found in my list of stories. Crow references some events of this fic in the latter fic.

I don't have a set updating schedule for this story. It will update when I finish a chapter! All comments and concrit are very welcome!