I woke up that morning at 6 to begin my routine. As I curled my long shiny golden hair I thought about my mother. This was the only thing she had taught me. She never once loved me. By 7 that morning my hair was curled my make up was done my stuff was ready for school and my cheerleading outfit was on since today was Friday game day. I knew my cousin Amy was still sleeping. If she had actually gotten out of bed by noon that would've been nice. Not that she ever did. Her philosophy was, why get up early if you didn't have a job. Which she didn't and she hadn't. I supposed the bus wouldn't be too terrible. It would give me time to socialize. Socialize. Like hell I would. God I never did. On buses anyway.
The morning passed by my in a slow long blur. I hadn't bothered to pack lunch so of course I didn't eat any. And the school lunch? Oh god who the hell would eat that?
So I went and sat in the library in my own private little corner away from everyone else. I stared off into space but pretty soon I started feeling panicky. I ran through the library ignoring everyone who kept telling me that running in the library wasn't allowed. I ran through the hallways my feet pounding. Now I was running so fast it seemed I would never stop and that I was flying. I ignored everyone who asked what was wrong. I wouldn't be safe and didn't stop running until I ran down the basement steps and into the women's restroom. There I leaned against a wall to catch my breath.
After lunch I had science. We started on our experiments with our lab partners. I got up to sharpen my pencil letting my partner do most of the work. My friend Nick was beside me at the pencil sharpener.
"Hey Kate," he said.
"Hi."
"I saw you run off at lunch today. Are you ok?"
"Yeah I'm fine."
"Ok."
Around 4 that afternoon, the rest of the cheerleaders and myself were sitting on the green grass ready for practice. Before we started practice our coach told us that since the school was going to Paris on vacation we wouldn't have any practice during that time. We already knew this since an announcement had been made previously during the school day.
Halfway through practice I started panicking again. I ran off the field into the locker room, gathered my stuff and ran home.
By the time I got home my hair was completely uncurled. I would have to recurl it again before the game that night. I ran upstairs and safely into my bedroom, which I closed and locked. No one called between the hours of 4 and 7 which was when the game was scheduled to begin. Not that I expected them to. No one called anymore anyway. Or emailed or IMed.
At 7:30 that night I ran back home again. And stayed there for the rest of the night. Any wasn't home. I didn't know where she was.
Later that night I tried to drown myself in my bathtub. I ended up passing out and falling asleep.