chapter 1

Miss Tortall
Everybody knows the Miss United States comp., right? Well, what if there was a Miss Tortall comp.? And this is exactly what this fic is about. Tortall is having a Miss Tortall beauty pageant comp. This is my first fic, so please don't flame. Thanx.



Disclaimer: Harry Potter, Hermione and Ron belongs to 'Harry Potter' and J.K. Rowling. All other characters belongs to Tamora Pierce. (but the plot's mine). And the Miss Tortall comp. is based on Miss United States.



Welcome to the very first Miss Tortall!!! Let's welcome our host, Lord Wyldon!!
(Lord Wlydon walkes on stage)

Lord Wyldon: Hello, everyone, welcome to Miss Tortall competition. This is certainly going to be a wonderful night, with our gorgeous contestants.......



(In the Audience)
Neal: Hey, how come he's the host? I thought it was gonna be the king.

Cleon: I heard that they changed it, 'cause they were afraid that the king might be biased and say not so pleasant comments to the other contestants.


King Jonathon, who is sitting not very far from the two, overhears their conversation and
whispers to himself: If this is the reason why they didn't let me be the host, I'm going to take actions of revenge very soon. Just think, this wonderful chance to kiss each of the gorgeous ladies with a perfectly good reason and without offending anyone - gone!!!! Errrr..............


(Back on stage)
Lord Wyldon, who is enjoying his role greatly: Now, ladies and gentlemen, let's welcome our judges!! I would also like to ask all of you to make them feel welcome, for to prevent any types of bribe, blackmail, or just plain bias-ness, the great mage Numair Salamin had volunteered to use his magic to invite a few important people from another realm to be here tonight!!! (audience claps and cheers)


Numair: (mutters under his breath) Yep sure, I volunteered to do it!! - after receiving a blackmail from the Miss Tortall Organising Committee.


Lord Wyldon: Would you all make them feel welcome - Mr Harry Potter, Miss Hermione Granger, and Mr Ron Weasley!!!!

(Audience claps and cheers. Harry, Hermione and Ron smiles politely.)

Ron, whispering to Harry: Um, what exactly is going on?

Harry, whispering back excitedly: I think we have been invited to judge a beauty pageant.

Ron: A beauty pageant!! Wow!! ...but how did we get here in the first place?..oh! and where on earth is this place?

(Harry shrugs)

Hermione, who had just overheard Ron's question: that was a extremely powerful spell, and I believe, and only a extremely - and I mean extremely - powerful mage could have done it! That great mage Numair Salamin is probably the most powerful mage ever!!! And as to where we are, they had just said that this is the Miss Tortall competition didn't they? That must mean we're in a place called Tortall!!

(Harry and Ron looks at her in wonder)



(Back on Stage, Lord Wyldon has continued with his speech)

Lord Wyldon: Now Ladies and Gentlemen, some of the contestants today you will know very well, including to queen and the King's Champion, the Lioness. But, there are also some which you may not know very well, and you must all keep in mind that this is a FAIR competition and we wish not to discourage any one. In order to do this, we will need your co-operation. You would all please ensure that you clap for the same amount of time and the same volume for every one of the contestants? Thankyou very much. Oh yes, also would you please..........



(in the Audience)

Faleron: when, in the name of Mithros, is he going to stop talking nonsense and get on with the competition?!!!

Neal: don't get worked up, you're just wasting your energy.

Cleon: yeah, have you ever seen the Stump stop doing anything just because one of his squires are angry?

Joren: hey you guys, be quiet, I think he's almost finished.
(the three shut up immediately, but only to hear...)

(back on stage)

Lord Wyldon: Now, would you please make sure that you have a smile on your face, and keep that smile the same for every one of the contestants. Let's welcome -

(all audiences waiting for the name of the first contestant)
Lord Wyldon: Oops!!! I forgot something, now would you please make sure.....

(groans from around the audience as Lord Wyldon goes on and on and on)

~~~~~(five Minutes laters)~~~~~~

Lord Wyldon: Here's our first contestant, would you make her feel welcome, Miss......


Author's Note: Do you like it? Hate it? Send your thoughts to me by filling out the blue box down there. And I have just decided that I'll only continue writing if I get more than 5 reviews (I have a whole lot more other things to do too, and this first fic is not very encouraging if I don't get enough reviews). Also, if I get lots of people to beg me not to have cliff-hangers I might not have any more cliff-hangers in my other chapters (if there are going to be any)