Author's Note:

This story was inspired by Bizarre Earth Customs by Nintendocat (which you can read on ) where Bulma discovers how odd Earth traditions seem to Vegeta. So being the Anthropology major that I am, I wanted to take it one step further to write a story where Vegeta discovers how odd Saiyan traditions seem to Bulma and, really, everyone else on Earth. Enjoy!

Recently-arrived refugees learn something new every minute: how to change a light bulb, where to catch the bus on their way to work, how to keep up with their children's obsession with Disney. Luckily, refugees in the United States almost always settle down near others from similar cultures and traditions. However, what happens when you have a refugee from an alien planet?

After the destruction of Frieza and the planet Namek, the last true Saiyan refugee was staying at the Capsule Corp. campus with the Briefs. Vegeta was living at the Brief's home instead of in his own apartment because the Briefs quickly realized Vegeta couldn't pass as a human (or even function on Earth) on his own.

Bulma was the one who invited him to stay at Capsule Corp., Bulma was the one who said he could stay at her house once the gang realized he had to be supervised, and Bulma was the one who agreed to him staying in the room across from her.

At least that was what Bulma reminded herself when she heard Vegeta scream her name at four in the morning. Well… his name for her at least.

"Woman! Earth woman!"

Bulma rolled over in her blue bedhead and moaned, "What, Vegeta?"

"Why is the gravity chamber door not opening?"

"Huh?"

"My apologies, I thought you were the exception to the all-humans-are-stupid rule, I went to train in the gravity chamber and couldn't open the door. As this is my first time using it myself, I assumed it is either broken and you can fix it or it is locked and you have the key. Do you have the key, woman? Or do you not know how to make a properly functioning door handle?"

"Uggghhhh" Bulma groaned and pushed herself further into the mattress, "It's voice locked. You just need the password."

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Well, what's the password?!" Vegeta said tensely- and much louder than Bulma would tolerate before dawn.

"Vegeta go to hell!"

"...That's a terrible password! People say that to me all the time!"

Bulma rolled her eyes and waited for it to dawn on the Prince but ten minutes later, Vegeta was back at her door yelling, "Woman the passphrase didn't work, are you sure you know what it is?"

Bulma just smiled into her pillow and said "I'm sure I know what it is Vegeta."

A moment of silence passed before Bulma nodded to herself, got out of bed, pulled on her softest bathrobe, and padded her way to her door to open it and look Vegeta in the eye. (Though she once again overestimated his height and had to subtly slide her eyes down a few inches to do so.)

"That wasn't the actual password, was it woman?"

"Nope, but I'll give it to you this time."

"No tricks?"

"Trix are for kids, Vegeta."

Bulma smiled at her own joke and thought the stupid joke was worth it to see Vegeta's confused little head tilt.

"I don't understand."

"The password is 'Shenron let me pass' and that's the truth."

Vegeta stared into her eyes over their two sets of crossed arms, his armoured ones contrasting with the plush sleeves of her bathrobe.

"On your Captain's life?"

"What?" Bulma asked, later swearing she saw Vegeta's mouth twitch up at her confused little head tilt before he turned his head to stare down the hallway.

"It's something we said on planet Vegeta. The closest person to any Saiyan is his captain or the King, and since the King is dead and you humans don't seem to be overly fond of your political leaders, it seemed appropriate to use 'your captain'. I assume you have one."

Bulma frowned and said, "We usually swear on other things like religious symbols or objects instead of people. And no I don't really have a captain anymore."

"Oh, did they fall in battle? Probably not considering they were your captain."

"No…" Bulma said slowly, "I just don't have anyone more superior than me anymore. I mean I still have my Dad, but he's about to pass the company to me and the political leaders you mentioned mostly follow my lead because I'm an international leader."

"So you are the highest level of Captain in your sector?"

The still groggy part of Bulma's genius mind decided she liked the sound of that, "Yeah I guess you could say that. Perhaps you should have afforded me some more respect."

Vegeta smirked, "You're still a weak little human, but you have earned a bit more respect than I had given you. You would still do well to remember that I'm a Prince and a born Elite and am therefore superior to all not only in biology but in pure power and birthright."

"Good luck trying to sell that here Vegeta. Oh, and enjoy the gravity chamber." and with that Bulma waved her hand over the control pad on the wall and shut her bedroom door. She stood there for a moment pondering Vegeta's reaction to her lack of a "Captain". As the furry bathrobe plopped onto the floor and her legs slid back under the covers, Bulma wondered what other peculiar things Vegeta's home world did. She fell asleep pondering a world where the only things precious enough to swear on was a person's superior officer and their king.