A.N./ This is most definitely AU. No like, no read, simple as that. This was inspired by the Teitho Contest "When I was your Age...".
Disclaimer: Don't own anything or anyone but Taendir. If you want to use him, please ask. Thanks a bunch!
"Ada, Ada, Ada!" Estel screamed, tearing through the hallways with a laughing Elladan on his heels.
"What is it, my son?" Elrond said, raising a brow.
"Quick! We have to run. The orc is nearly upon us! Move, Ada. Move!"
Elrond laughed as his foster son began tugging on his hand in a futile attempt to get him to follow.
Elladan made a very convincing snarl, and lunged at the boy, his arms outstretched, making "claw-hands", and causing Estel to squeal in delight.
"Run! He is about to get us!" he cried, looking comical as he tugged Elrond behind him down the hall.
"That's right, little one, flee! For you cannot evade the great and terrible Elladan for long!" he laughed, keeping a distance behind his father.
Glorfindel walked up the hall just then, his nose buried in a stack of reports from the borders. Glancing up, he said, "Just what on Eru's green Arda are you doing? On second thought, mayhap it is best I do not know. Yes, definitely best."
"Glorfindel, join us! You must defend us from the orc!"
"Yes, Glorfindel, why don't you come with us? It is always comforting to have the great Balrog-Slayer at your back," Elrond said, his grey eyes twinkling with mirth.
"Oh fine…just let me stow away these papers in my…blast, my bag is still in the library…I fear I must return…"
"Glorfindel," Elrond said.
"Yes?"
"Your bag is on your shoulder."
He turned his head and said sheepishly, "Oh, silly me. How could I have missed that?" Grimacing, he tucked the dispatches safely away and joined them.
"So. Do we have a plan of attack, little one?" he said, coming up beside the human child.
"Yes. Run!" Estel squealed, as Elladan's outstretched hands came dangerously close to grabbing him.
"Did we ever do this when we were younger?" Glorfindel asked Elrond under his breath.
"All the time. Do you not remember?"
"No, seeing as I was in Gondolin at the time…"
"Well, Thranduil and I definitely were not the most innocent elflings around. Poor Celeborn…I remember that particular time when he had to watch us while Oropher and Gil Galad were in a council with their Chief Advisors. Erestor was not that much older than us at that time, either…"
Some time in the First Age…
"Celeborn?" Thranduil asked his older cousin as he sat on the bed.
"What is it, little one?" Celeborn replied, busy braiding a squirming Elrond's hair.
"Can we go hunting?"
"Are you insane?" he said incredulously, actually turning to look at him.
"Yes. So can we?"
Celeborn looked at the innocent(too innocent) face for a moment, before turning back to Elrond's hair and saying firmly, "No. Your ada would have my head. Both of yours, for that matter. I simply cannot allow you to. Elrond, do sit still! You will get your hair hopelessly tangled, and then I shall have to comb it out again. Do you really want me to have to do that?"
"No," came the sullen reply as the young peredhel calmed his movements.
"That is what I thought. Now…"
"You can think, Celeborn?" Thranduil said sarcastically, interrupting him.
"Are you not just a bit too young to be saying that sort of thing? Valar, you are only thirty yet."
"And I-ouch, you pulled, Celeborn! I am turning twenty eight!" Elrond said importantly, his little child's chest puffed out with pride.
"Yes, but I am still older than you. By the way, where is Elros?"
"I have no idea. I think he might be with Erestor somewhere…"
"There you go, Elrond. Your hair is all finished. You two go to the kitchens and grab something for breakfast, and then we can to go the clearing and have a picnic later," Celeborn said, shooing them out of Thranduil's room.
Meanwhile, back in Imladris…
"Hurry, Glorfindel! He almost got you! You must run faster!" Estel shrieked, causing Elrond to wince.
"I am running as fast as I possibly can, little one!" Glorfindel said, putting on a show of gasping for breath. "You are simply too fast for me to keep up with for very long, am I right, Elrond?"
"Oh, aye," the Lord of Imladris agreed, nodding his head gravely. "Much too quick for Man, Elf, or Orc."
"But what about an elven orc?" Glorfindel mumbled under his breath.
"I heard that, my friend," Elrond said, glancing at him out of the corner of his eye.
They suddenly came to a screeching halt(quite literally, in Estel's case), as Elladan's mirror image came leaping out at them from an alcove in the corridor.
"Aha! You are all trapped! Now you can never escape my bat cave!"
"Bat cave?" Elladan said, looking at his twin in confusion.
"It was a spur of the moment thing. Shut up."
"Whatever you say…Oh Battyness."
"If I were not so busy chasing these elves so I may have them in my stew tonight, I would string you up from the highest tree by your toes, you insubordinate little squab."
"You just called me a pigeon. Ada, did you hear that? Elrohir called me a pigeon!"
Estel had been steadily sneaking them sideways while his foster brothers had been bickering amongst themselves, so now he tugged both Glorfindel and Elrond forward, dodging their arms as they tried to capture their quarry.
Back some time in the First Age…
"Elrond?" Thranduil said as Celeborn trailed a good few feet behind.
"Yes?" the dark haired half elf asked.
"I want to go hunting, but Celeborn won't let us. What do you want to do to him?" Thranduil whispered.
"Erm…nothing? Oh! How 'bout we put a frog in his bed?"
"No, no…not bad enough, but I like the way you think…what about this? We put ink in his tea, so when he drinks it, his teeth will turn black. And then…then we can get one of those big barrels of lard from the kitchens, and completely grease his floors with them! Oh, and then…"
"What are you two plotting over there, eh?" the object of their juvenile minds asked suspiciously, coming over to stand behind them.
"Oh, nothing at all, Celeborn. We were merely deciding what we wanted to eat," Elrond replied, looking up at him with unblinking grey eyes.
"Uhuh…for some reason, I do not truly believe you…"
"You should. Gil Galad raised me. I definitely do not think Ada would be very pleased if he heard how suspicious you were over us."
Celeborn groaned and rubbed the side of his face with one hand. Those two had really not pulled the whole Ada thing, had they?! Of course they had to…
"Ah, here we are, little ones!" he said in relief. He still wasn't completely convinced that they weren't planning anything.
Celeborn entered at a much more sedate pace than the two elflings had, and nodded to the head cook.
"How are you this morn?" Taendir asked.
"Very well, if a bit harried. And you?" Celeborn returned.
"Quite well indeed! I take it you are watching these two monsters for the day, eh?"
"Unfortunately, yes…"
"I heard that, Celeborn!" Thranduil yelled from behind an enormous barrel of Dorwinion.
Celeborn groaned and facepalmed. "Will I never be free of them?"
"At the rate at which this council is going…no."
"Thank you ever so much for that, Taendir…you are such an amazing help, I simply do not know what on Arda I will ever do without you when I return to Doriath…"
"Why, Celeborn! I never knew you felt that way," he grinned.
"I swear, if you do not hush right this instant, that wooden spoon will be rammed down your good for nothing throat…"
"You best not let the children hear that, my friend. Remember. Little pitchers have big ears."
"That is most definitely right. Did you hear that, Thranduil? You have big ears!" Elrond laughed.
"I promise you, I am going to tell Ada!"
"Whatever you say, Thranduil…whatever you say…"
Once the two elflings had something to eat, Celeborn ushered them to their room, then said, "I shall be back in half an hour. Do not do anything, do not leave this room…for Valar's sake, don't even breathe! Alright?"
Puffing up their cheeks with air, they nodded, big grey eyes wide and innocent…until the door shut behind him.
"Alright, Elrond. We don't have much time. If we hurry, we can get the lard over here, and several rags…the ink in the tea should be no problem. Then…oh, how about we smear honey in his hair when he sleeps!"
"Can we add ink to that, too?" Elrond asked, with a frighteningly diabolical tone to his voice.
"Uhuh! Oh, this is going to be so much fun…and we can tuck the bottom of his sheets up, so he will not be able to get in all the way…ha! Elrond, you and I are geniuses!" he crowed, throwing his arm over his best friend's shoulder.
"But I'm a bit smarter, right? Since I came up with all this in the first place…"
"You came up with it…I ironed out all the wrinkles."
"Whatever."
Quietly, they set to work, and actually managed to smuggle out all their ingredients without anyone being the wiser.
Back in Imladris…
"I say Elrond, that was the most fun I have had since that orc attack three months ago!" Glorfindel gasped out from where he was sprawled on the floor with an exhausted Estel on his lap.
Elrond, who had the decency to at least do so in a chair, nodded his head in agreement. "Who knew little boys could run so fast for so long, eh?"
"I never knew Estel had it in him," Elrohir agreed, gratefully accepting a glass of water from his older brother.
Erestor, who was, in his mind, in the wrong place at the wrong time, merely grumbled, "You were all acting like a bunch of lunatics. Now, do be quiet so I can get back to my work in relative peace, please?"
"Oooh, what has your leggings in a twist this time, Story?" Elladan grinned, using Estel's nickname for him. For some reason, the boy still wasn't able(or simply just refused) to call him by his given name, and so he settled for Story.
"You and your twin, that is what," came the disgruntled reply, although it was half hearted. Everyone, including Erestor, had an enormous soft spot for the little human boy Elrond was fostering.
"Elrond," Erestor said suddenly. "Do you remember the time when Celeborn was watching you and Thranduil during that council in Greenwood?"
"Do I ever," came the reply.
Glorfindel had started laughing loudly, causing the three youngest occupants in the room to look incredibly intrigued.
"What happened, Ada?" Elrohir-or was it Elladan? Elrond couldn't be sure at that moment since he was laughing too hard-asked.
"Well, my son, it started out like this…"
Some time in the First Age…
"Are you sure this is going to work?" Elrond hissed form their vantage point in the hall as Celeborn walked toward his room. They had spent almost the entire time going over the wooden floors with the lard, leaving it glistening…and incredibly slippery.
"It should," Thranduil whispered back. "Look, he is turning the knob now…"
"We should have done something to the door knob as well, don't you think?"
Thranduil shook his head. "No, he would have suspected something immediately, and probably have gone looking for us. It was best that we didn't touch it…this time. Oh! But maybe, after we "fix" his hair, we can loosen it, and see what happens in the morning, no?"
"Did I ever tell you how much I adore the way your mind works?"
The little elven prince merely grinned and shrugged, his chest puffed out with pride.
"Ah, there he goes now!" Elrond said, scrambling to the side of the statue they were hiding behind to get a better view. Celeborn had disappeared into his room, and only made it three steps before his foot slid out from underneath him, causing him to do a spectacular fall.
"Ooof!" he gasped, landing hard on his rump and sliding a good few feet from his starting point. "What on…Elrond! Thranduil!" Celeborn struggled to his feet, slipping and sliding the whole way, only to find them sitting complacently in Thranduil's room, playing with a deck of cards.
"Oh, hello Celeborn!" Elrond chirruped. "Do you want to help us build a card tower?"
"NO!" he bellowed. "I demand you to tell me what on Arda you did to my floor!"
The elflings shared an identical look of confusion. "What do you mean?" Thranduil asked. "We have done not a thing, but play with the deck of cards Ada gave me last month."
"Somehow, I doubt that."
"Did the tea come yet?" Elrond asked. "We never got ours."
"Yes, as a matter of fact, it did…" Celeborn trailed off.
"Oh. I suppose Thranduil and I will just have to go down to the kitchens to get it then. Thank you, Celeborn!" Elrond got up and hugged him around the knees before skipping out of the room, Thranduil not far behind.
Celeborn just stood there, staring.
Back in Imladris…
"Ada? You do know that Daerada is here, do you not?" Elladan said, though he was grinning from ear to pointed ear. "Are you sure you should be telling this?"
"Oh please. Unless he either walks in right now, or someone decides to tell him, we should be fine. Actually, Erestor. Go get Thranduil. He should be listening to this, too."
The Chief Advisor nodded, grinned, and left the room.
"…Why is Thranduil here again, Ada?" Estel asked.
"Because, my son. He is here for the same reason your Daerada is."
"And that would be…"
Elrond let out a long suffering sigh. "Because it is the summer solstice, we are in the middle of a council, and I have not seen my friend in several decades, that is why."
"Oh. Alright, then!"
Erestor returned then with the Elven King in tow. "Look who I found wandering the library, Elrond!" he said with a wink.
"What did you need me for, my friend? I have Legolas running around with that insane Marchwarden at the ranges, and I was attempting to keep an eye on them…"
"We are currently in the middle of The Story. You know which one I am speaking of, my friend."
Glorfindel suddenly found himself afraid of the mischievous gleam in Thranduil's keen grey eyes.
"Best not let Celeborn hear…he's still sore about it," he grinned.
"Exactly."
"So, where were we?"
"I had just gotten to the part where we ran off to get our tea tray from the kitchen staff."
"Ah, yes, I remember!"
In the First Age…
"How long do you think it will be before he finds out we have done something to the tea?" Elrond giggled(of all things!).
"I honestly have no idea, my friend. It could be tonight, mayhap even tomorrow…you never know with Celeborn, eh?"
Elrond simply let out an evil chuckle.
Back in Imladris…
"Did Daerada ever find out, Ada?" Estel asked, looking at his foster father as if he were the most heroic person in the world.
"Well, of course he found out, little one. Just…not until the next day. Thrnaduil, do you wish to take over?"
The Elven King nodded, and began to speak…
Some time in the First Age…
"Elrond."
"Yes?"
"I slipped in a sleeping powder, too. He should fall asleep soon after he finishes the pot."
"I love your mind, Thranduil."
"I love it too…" The little elf stiffened suddenly, and darted to the door. "Someone is coming! Quick! Pretend like you were doing something!"
Elrond and Thranduil were a flurry of activity, and both threw themselves down to the floor and propped their chins on their hands as if they had been reading the children's book in front of them the entire time when Oropher and Gil Galad walked in.
"Ada!" Elrond said, leaping up and running to his foster father.
"My son! Have you behaved yourself at all?" Gil Galad asked, raising a dark brow.
"Of course I did, Ada. I think we tired out Celeborn though. He's sleeping."
"Is he really?"
"Mhm. He looked really tired. I think hiding and making him find us while we went on our picnic did it. Or maybe it was the race we had coming back…or maybe…"
"Alright, alright, I understand, Elrond. Now, go and have fun with Thranduil some more. We will be back to bring you to dinner. Oropher, should we wake up Celeborn?"
"No, don't wake him up, Ada!" Thranduil said, plastering on the most angelic face he could muster. "We made him do so much today with us. He deserves to sleep."
"Well…very well then," Oropher decided, plopping Thranduil back down on his bed. "You behave now, alright? I definitely do not want to hear that you have done something horrible when I return. Anything you think I might not approve of, don't do it."
"Yes, Ada. We promise."
"Good. Gil Galad, shall we?"
Once the elf lords exited the room, Elrond turned to Thranduil and said, "Good thinking. I definitely would not have thought of an excuse not to wake him up that quickly."
Thranduil nodded. "Want to get the honey ready?"
"Of course I do! Just exactly who on Arda do you think I am?"
"Erm…Elrond?"
"Whatever. Come on! Before someone else decides to stop us!"
In Imladris…
"Were you caught, Ada?"
"No, Estel. Now, stop interrupting, and let Thrnaduil continue."
"Fine…" he huffed, snuggling deeper into Glorfindel's robes.
Some time in the First Age…
"Not too much, Thranduil. We definitely don't want to honey to become too runny…ha! It rhymed!"
"Just stay focused, Elrond!" Thranduil hissed in reply. It was now late at night, and Elrond had snuck into Thranduil's rooms to complete the last part of their plan.
"I am, I am!" he grumbled. "What's that extra lard doing here? I thought we got rid of it all."
"Oh. We're going to put it on his door knob…on the inside, of course, and then loosen the screws keeping it in place. I really think listening to Ada's childhood stories has done wonders for my imagination, no?"
Elrond nodded in agreement. "Ada never tells me any of his funnier ones. Although, I did hear of a few, but those were only in passing reference."
"Only in passing reference? Elrond, you are sounding more and more like that bookworm of a brother you have."
"I happen to like reading, you know!" he retorted, fisting his tiny hands on his hips.
"Just concentrate. Perfect! We can go finish everything now."
Quietly, the elflings snuck out of the bedroom, and into Celeborn's.
"There. Go do his hair, Elrond. I will work on the door."
Elrond nodded once and poured an enormous glob of blackened honey onto the palm of his little hand.
They worked quickly and efficiency, and only paused to snigger quietly into their elbows two or three times before they were safely out of the room again, and in Thrnaduil's.
"That. Was. AMAZING!" Elrond cried out, laughing.
"I know! We have to do that again the next time we are together, my friend."
"Uhuh! See you in the morning, Thranduil. I need to go wash everything off; not to mention, I am getting sleepier and sleepier. Night!"
Thranduil waved in return, threw the small jar of lard(it was nearly empty anyway) out the window and into the bushes, and went to sleep with a smile on his face.
The next morning at breakfast, a fuming Celeborn burst in and bellowed, "Elrond Gil Galadion, and Thranduil Oropherion! How DARE you two!"
The young elflings in question gave simultaneous "EEP!"s and dashed out of their chairs.
Gil Galad and Oropher took one look at Celeborn and burst out laughing, while Erestor said, "That is where my good ink went!"
For Celeborn's hair was no longer its gorgeous(if he did say so himself) shade of silvery blonde. No, instead it was jet black, and sticking up in matted spikes all over his head. One of them had flopped downwards during the night, and was hanging stiffly in a curly cue over his nose. The rest of him hadn't evaded being smeared with ink, either, as everyone could see every time he opened his mouth. Celeborn had managed to catch the two just outside of the kitchens, and had watched, still fuming, while they cleaned up his floors and fixed his door knob. Both had received a stern talking to as well from Gil Galad and Oropher, and were made to apologise to him.
But, they still had no small amount of satisfaction, as Celeborn's hair remained black for weeks, as well as his teeth.
Back in Imladris…
"And so, I got in trouble, boys, your ada got in trouble…Erestor refused to let us anywhere near his precious inks for two decades, and Celeborn all but banned us from the kitchens. Elladan and Elrohir, do not even think about getting this into your heads! Once is definitely enough, no matter how long ago it was," Thranduil concluded, fixing all three with a stern glare.
"Oh you have nothing to worry about. Ada would know it was us immediately. And besides. It is just so much more fun when you get Glorfindel to do it!" Elrohir replied.
There was a noise from the doorway, and everyone looked up to see Celeborn standing there, his face rapidly changing hues from pink, to red, to purple.
"You told them the story?!" he bellowed, taking a threatening step into the room. "YOU TOLD THEM THE STORY?!"
Elrond and Thranduil wasted no time in dashing out the side door, laughing as loudly as they did then, with a furious(understatement of the Age) Celeborn hot in their heels.
Estel turned to look at Glorfindel and said, "Will Daerada hurt Ada and Thranduil, Glorfindel?"
"No, youngling. He definitely would not…your Daenana would personally see to his…well, erm…he would get into a lot more trouble, let us just put it that way."
"Oh. Alright then!" Estel appeared to be deep in thought for a moment. Everyone groaned as he turned around to face Glorfindel and said, "What did you do when you were young?"
Translations:
Taendir-Thin Man
Daerada-grandpa
Daernana-grandma
Have fun, my lovelies, and thanks for reading! If you wish to submit an idea for me to add, just drop me a line. I plan on making this a multi-chaptered thing. *waves wildly* Toodles! And press the big, shiny(well okay, not shiny, but still) green button!
