You know, after you repeatedly get torn to pieces and scattered, you no longer care enough to put the smaller pieces back together. Eventually, you don't have much left, except shards in your pocket. I guess that's what happened. After years of heartbreak, I still haven't learned. Since I know the problem, I should know how to counteract it, right? Wrong. Very wrong. As I watch you I know I'll never learn. Over and over, my heart has been placed in the hands of ones I thought I could trust, only to be shredded. But I can't help but hope you'll be different, like so many times before. Yuusuke says you're shrimpy. I guess it's true, but height never seemed to matter to me. I attach to eyes. I've never seen any quite like yours, so fiery red. I guess it fits, since you control fire elements. I just stick to roses. Like my heart. They say it's beautiful, untouchable. Impossible to hurt, with its defenses. I've heard it all said about me. But really, if you know where to hold, which isn't so hard to figure out, roses are easy to grasp and destroy. Blood red, so easy to shatter. I've been asked why my eyes always look so sad. I tell them it's because of Mother. It used to be a reason, not anymore, but I still say it. After all, who would believe me if I said it's because half my heart's missing, because I'm still waiting for a reason to put it back together? For now, I'm still collecting shards. Maybe soon I'll have my reason. After all, I've never seen eyes like yours. I realize I'm staring again, but this time you're looking back.
"What's wrong, Kurama?"
"Nothing." I've never seen eyes like yours.
"I'm not a fool. What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing important." I like them; you've got such beautiful eyes.
"Kurama, like I said, I am no fool. Now tell me what's wrong."
You lower and sheath your sword and take a step towards me, hands on hips. You've got wonderful eyes, you know.
"Nothing." I can fell the shards in my pocket. Should I count them for you?
"Kurama…"
I find it comforting that you know me well enough to tell I'm lying. I don't think that's ever happened before. You'd think I'd be smarter about who I give my trust to. Of course not; I never learn my lessons. Maybe sometimes that's a good thing. Oh, all gods and demons, I love your eyes.
"Tell me what you're really thinking about."
What I was thinking about? Lets see. A broken heart, shards in my pocket, trust, roses, lessons and your eyes. Of course, I'd be funny to see how you would react if I told you that. Will the number of shards increase or will they be put pack in their proper place? I'll tell you then…
"Kurama, I'm still waiting…"
"I was thinking about a broken heart, shards in my pocket, trust, roses, lessons and…" Should I go on? The faster I move, the quicker I will either have more shards or a whole heart. You have beautiful red eyes, you know.
"And?"
"…and your eyes." You start nodding, but suddenly realize what I have just said. Those eyes of yours, they look brighter than before. What can I say, I'm spellbound. And for once, it had nothing to do with that 3rd eye of yours. It's there, but I don't find it very meaningful.
"What did you say?"
"I said 'and your eyes.'" And they widen. It doesn't sound that strange, does it? After all, everyone must notice other people's eyes. Or maybe it's just me. You take off your bandana.
"Mind if I intrude?"
"No, not really." What did it matter? I was going to have to let you find out either way. And like this I wouldn't have to say it.
"Your mind is a labyrinth, you know that?"
Sure, I knew. I'd been told before. I also know my only clear thought is my weakness, most likely because it's the only clear though I have. Your eyes widen more, and I can tell you've reached the core of my mind. So, what do you think?
"You've been destroyed so many times. Why do you trust me?"
"I have no choice. I never learn my lesson. Shouldn't you realize?" Besides, I can't help but hope you'll be different.
"Yes, but I still can't figure it out. You're like a puzzle to me. You know the problem, yet do not work on the solution"
"I've tried." Painful memories, worst shredders.
"So I realize."
Those eyes of yours… "I can't help it. Even I don't understand my own heart sometimes." Silence surrounds us for a moment.
"May I see those shards you spoke of?"
"They are metaphorical."
"I realize that. If you conjure up an image of them in your mind…"
I nod, though still looking at the same place, lost in burning crimson. What do I have to lose? Shards no longer make a difference. Pain has burdened me down enough to stay numb of it for a while.
"So many…how many times?"
"I can't remember. More times than shards." Since I'm already enraptured, I decide to go deeper into the red. And inside those eyes of yours, I can see something I've never before.
"Hiei, tell me, why do your eyes shine like that?" I can feel you probing for a picture, so you can pinpoint what I'm talking about. You look shocked for a second. Out of the corner of my vision, I can see your bandana dropping to the ground.
"Kurama…"
I find I have nothing to say. So many pieces, such beautiful eyes.
"I can't explain."
I've felt that way before. You close you're eyes. That startled me. There's no more red. You take a step. Another. Another. I can feel your presence. Since I'm no longer looking anyway, I close my own.
"Let me make you understand."
I nod. I can smell you near me. I am a fox after all. I can feel you get closer and closer. Your arms wrap around me and I can feel my breath mixing with my own. I melt into your embrace.
Look.
I've finally found a reason for putting back together my heart.
I always thought your eyes were different.
~*~*~*~*~
Beverly: I saw a picture of a chibi Hiei hugging a chibi Kurama that looked scared and looking like 'touch him and die.' And I have a natural obsession with eyes. I guess it just sparked and I decided to write this.
Chibi Kurama: Hey! I don't remember that! I don't get scared! And I really don't run to fire demons to help me either! …ok, maybe I like fire demons when I get older, but still!
Hiei: HOW COULD YOU BE SO MEAN TO KURAMA?!?
Beverly: *pulls her tongue out at him.* Oh, give it a rest. Besides, count yourself lucky. I wasn't being the EVIL authoress as I could be.
Hiei: that's true…
Beverly: Now go away before I decide to write a torture fic about you.
Hiei: *eyes widen and runs off, screaming bloody murder*
Beverly: BWAHAHAHAHA *cough cough* HAHAHAHA stupid cold…
Chibi Kurama: Umm…yeah…
Beverly: REVIEW PLEASE! *looks at CK.* Oh, and you're coming with me, I gotta pick Chibi Hiei up at the playground.
Chibi Kurama: YAY, CHIBI HIEI!!!!!
Beverly: *smirks*
Chibi Kurama: I mean, umm, ok, whatever.
Beverly: sssssssssure… *picks CK up and walks off*
Note: isn't he cute as a chibi. Hehehe. Can you imagine how short Hiei is as a chibi?? Ouch, make sure you don't step on him…
