Well, here is the result of me trying out something really angsty-ish. This was only going to be a little 300 word drabble thing, and it started out completely different in my head, and then mutated into...this! I hope you like it!

AU, by the way.

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, or any of the characters.


The artificial lighting glinted off the metal in my hands, its sharp edge laughing at me, daring me, taunting me to no end.

A drop landed on it, and I quickly wiped away the evidence of my weakness, the injury inside me, that no one could see. A picture caught my eye. It was from 2 years ago.

My best friend and I, when we went on a trip to New York City in America, we visited the Statue of Liberty and Times Square, and the screens of Times Square had been flashing with bright colors and my friend took off the sunglasses he hardly ever removed and gave them to me, to protect my vulnerable eyes. His arm was around my shoulders, as I laughed over a joke I couldn't remember.

His eyes were shut, and he was laughing along, though I think his eyes were shut to prevent getting his oddly colored eyes on camera. The memory of the black sclera and gold irises danced around my memory, and increased the flow of liquid helplessness, without my realizing it. There was now a small puddle on the object clutched in my hands, perfectly formed droplets, and I laughed bitterly as a realization hit me.

How could this object, this blade, look so innocent covered in tear drops when it had been the thing to kill the person who meant the most to me? This devil sword, belonging to, in my mind, the devil himself, made me laugh even more.

I gazed at the picture, not even looking at myself, but staring at him. My best friend. The one who fell down with me, and caught my arm to pull me back up and put the broken pieces back together. I loved him. And now he was gone.

Where had he gone? I had no family. He was the closest thing to family I ever had, and now even he was gone. What was I supposed to do now?

I hiccupped, choking on my tears before drawing in more ragged breaths. I considered the blade for a moment, wondering if the death toll created by it going up by one would be a problem. I lifted it, and dropped it again.

I could never do that. He'd kill me if I did. Or rather, revive me, and then kill me, burn my body, and dance on the ashes. He was always telling me to live, no matter what happened, to forge on and get past it, move on.I had agreed at the time, that I could recover from anything, and get past it all, but I hadn't known that I would have to do it without him. I couldn't do it without him.

I pulled myself off the wood floor, stumbling through our-no, now my apartment, and made my way to my room. His room was right next to it, but I couldn't bear going in there. His smell lingered in there still, and I would break down again if I were to go in his space, the place he had kept all his personal things, and memories of his own lost family.

I stripped down to my boxers and collapsed heavily onto my bed, curling in on myself and clutching my pillow as if it were a lifeline. Maybe it was. A small dinging sound came from my computer, and I tripped over to it.

I'd gotten an IM message. The sender name made my eyes widen, and then narrow again, thinking it was a cruel trick. Who would play a prank like this, when everyone knew I'd been dealt a harsh enough of a blow as it is?

I clicked the message, humoring the trickster on the other side. There were only 4 words.

Come to my room.

I whimpered at the thought of going in there. I didn't want another onslaught of emotional attacks. I shut the conversation down with a click and began to shuffle to my bed again when the ding went off again. The IM box was back up. With 2 words.

Please, King.

My body shook, and I clasped the chair to keep from falling. Only he called me that. And that was only when we were alone. No one else knew about the nickname. What's going on? If there is a God, why is he doing this to me? What did I ever do to deserve this torture?

The dreaded ding went off again.

Please, aibou, this isn't a trick. Please believe me.

My lip trembled and I shoved away from the computer, ripping open my door and slamming it shut again. I ran out to the living room, and flipped on the TV to drown out the dinging noise. My tears were back full force again, and I tried to stem them by watching whatever show was on, but I couldn't get into it.

That dinging noise was going off in my room again. Non-stop. My hands clutched over my ears, I curled into myself again, wishing I had a blanket, so I could hide under it like I was a small child, hiding from the boogie monster.

I started humming, trying to calm myself. I moaned from the anguish I was feeling, and I sniffled as my eyes started to prick again. I felt scared for some reason, and my body burned, like someone's gaze was fixed upon it. My imagination started to kick in. Before I could stop the thought, the image of me opening my eyes to the rotting corpse of my best friend made me panic and kick my feet as I tried again and again to block that train of thought.

A voice whispered my name.

The dinging had become a steady beat now, matching my racing heart.

The voice said my name again slightly louder.

I cried out, covering my ears tighter, and humming louder.

The voice called again, and I could feel my body being shifted. Then I felt a prick, and a wave of some unfamiliar feeling came across me, and calmness enveloped me like a blanket.

What felt like seconds later, my eyes blinked open to a bright light, and...white? Everything was white. My mind flickered back to my best friend, but I quickly pushed the thought away. I didn't want to collapse into tears just yet. Then I heard a voice. But not just any voice. His voice. It was calling me.

I located the voice and saw him. He was so beautiful. The thought that I was dreaming flickered across my mind, until he rushed over to me, and hugged me, whispering assurances, until I pulled back, eyes flickering confusedly. Then I heard it. That dinging.

I jerked my head around and found the source of the dinging. It was on a monitor, not unlike a computer, and lines were going up and down in 'V' shapes. My confusion mutated into panic and I yanked the blanket over my head, and made myself into a human ball. I heard him whispering with another person I didn't know, until a voice spoke to me;

"There isn't a reason to be afraid. You might be scared because you had a side effect from your medicine and you were hallucinating. Do you remember the accident?"

It all came rushing back to me. Walking down the street. A lunatic running up to us with a knife. That devil knife from my 'hallucination.' Jumping in front of my best friend and the one I loved to protect him, and getting stabbed in the chest. Collapsing. Ambulance sirens. Then...darkness.

I nodded numbly.

"Ichigo?"

I looked at my best friend and smiled as best as I could, but I guessed that it probably looked like a grimace.

"Shi-ro?" I whispered as if it were a question, though I knew it was already true. I just needed an affirmation that he was alive. That he was here. That he was alright.

Shiro beamed and hugged me again gently, so as not to hurt my chest.

"Yea Ichigo. I'm here. I'm so sorry. I wi-"

"Stop," I rasped out quietly.

He merely blinked at me, and I dragged myself to a sitting position, and pulled his head towards me, pressing my pinks lips to his cold white ones. I kissed him gently and pulled back.

"Love you Shiro," I whispered, still not having completely recovered my voice yet.

He leaned forward and hesitantly touched his lips to my forehead.

"Love you too, King."


So, as some of the people who have read my work before may realize, this is a bit different from my style. But I kind of enjoyed trying this out. I realize the name makes no sense, but remember how I said in the top AN that this started out completely different? Well, the original involved a harvest moon. So I decided to drag that into this XD

And in the hallucination, Ichigo did NOT kill Shiro. Shiro was killed by the lunatic from the last part in his hallucination. So yea...

Review telling me how I did; Good, bad, so-so, amazing, don't care, 436, whatever, reviews are always welcomed! I'm out of cookies, but you can have some popsicles! Any flavor!

So, Til next time!