This is a Steven Universe homage to Who's on First? This'll be an alternate take on the scene from "Are you My Dad?" where we first meet Aquamarine so the dialogue is INTENTIONALLY NOT WORD FOR WORD

Steven was on the search for the missing humans. He left the arcade, when outside the arcade, he heard another voice

"Are you my dad?" the cute high pitched voice asked. Steven turned to see a tiny, light blue gem. Who had a teardrop shaped gem.

"Oh!" Steven said sounding startled "Uh.. Hi there." he waved awkwardly

Aquamarine "Are you my Dad? I'm looking for My Dad."

Steven confused "What? No, I'm not your dad."

Aquamarine "I didn't ask you for if you were Your Dad, I asked if you were My Dad"

Steven "... Okay... What does your dad look like?"

Aquamarine "No, I don't know what your dad looks like, I need to find My Dad"

Steven slightly annoyed "Okay... so what does "My Dad" look like?" he asked with finger quotes

Aquamarine monotone stare "No, but I need to find My Dad."

Steven "Wha- Je-... How could you not know what your own dad looks like?"

Aquamarine "I don't need to know what Your Own Dad looks like, I need to know what My Dad looks like "

Steven angry "That's what I said!"

Aquamarine "No it's not. You asked me about Your Own Dad, I asked about My Dad."

Steven "I know, I said your dad!" he exclaimed in anger

Aquamarine "and that's not who I'm looking for."

Steven "Then who are you looking for?!"

Aquamarine "My Dad"

Steven "(groan)... Okay, let's start over; Who are you looking for?"

Aquamarine "My Dad"

Steven "Okay, and when was the last time you saw your dad?"

Aquamarine "I've never seen your dad, but I need to find My Dad"

Steven increased anger "O...kay. Where did you last see him?"

Aquamarine "Who's Him?"

Steven twitch "Your dad!"

Aquamarine "Is he referred to as Him or Your Dad?"

Steven "Why Would I know that?!"

Aquamarine "You told me you could help me find My Dad"

Steven Facepalm "So.. does your dad look like you at all?"

Aquamarine "Why would Your Dad look like me?"

Steven "... Because most dads do!"

Aquamarine "Maybe Most Dads look like me, but I don't care about Most Dads, I just need to find My Dad. I want to know what My Dad looks like"

Steven "You tell me!"

Aquamarine "How can I?"

Steven groan, "Well... how about a mom? Do you have a mom?"

Aquamarine "But I'm not looking for A Mom"

Steven grinds teeth "But my question is Do You Have a mom!? Do you know where your mom is?!"

Aquamarine "...I don't need A Mom, and I don't need Your Mom. I'm simply looking for My Dad."

Steven "I never mentioned my mom!"

Aquamarine "I know. All you mentioned was Your Mom and A Mom, and I certainly don't want Your Dad."

Steven "So, you're not looking for my dad?"

Aquamarine "No, that's exactly who I'm looking for."

Steven shaking from anger "You just said you're not looking for your dad!"

Aquamarine "Exactly, I'm merely looking for My Dad"

Steven "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" with that, the male Crystal Gem ran away, screaming in pure insanity

(THE END)

THANK YOU FOR READING! Please leave an honest comment and tell me if you enjoyed this little skit. More importantly, tell me if you thought I did a good job

(I DO NOT OWN STEVEN UNIVERSE! STEVEN UNIVERSE AND THE CHARACTERS BELONG TO CARTOON NETWORK AND REBECCA SUGAR)