Because the Siege of Lothal has left me with tons of angst. My take on Ahsoka's thoughts/feelings on Vader.

"Ahsoka, do you know who... or what he is?"

"No. I don't."

She was lying, of course. She knew who he was, or at least, who he had once been. She couldn't believe though. Anakin, her master, the Chosen One, the Hero with No Fear….Darth Vader? Her master, the one who had marched on the temple with the majority of the 501st, the one who had slaughtered countless Jedi, the one who had slaughtered younglings? It seemed impossible. And yet, the Force did not lie. His Force signature, while dark and twisted, was undeniably his. She would recognize it anywhere, even if it had been years. Darth Vader was Anakin Skywalker.

Grief threatened to choke her. Her master, kind and bright and reckless and impulsive and like no other Jedi, had fallen. Fallen to the Dark Side, and had become a Sith Lord.

What had happened?

Sure, Anakin had not been the Council's definition of a perfect Jedi. But evil? Never. The man had been emotional, and strong in the Force, but dark and twisted? The Anakin she had known and loved would never had done the things Vader had done. The Anakin she had known would have stayed true to light, would have gone down fighting, a Jedi to the end.

So, what had happened?

If Anakin was Vader, then that meant that he was evil right before the start of the Purge. Sometime between when she had left and that day, Anakin had fallen, and had become Vader. Had become a Sith Lord. Had marched on the Temple and laid waste to all inside of it, from Knights to Padawans to younglings.

And now, as the Emperor's Hand, he was hunting them down. Hunting down the fledging Rebellion, with its brave fighters and motley crews. Hunting down her. Just like all those years ago on Coruscant, except this time, there would be no holding back. He wouldn't restrain himself or try to reason with her. He would simply strike her down, and move on, with one less threat to the Empire to concern himself with.

When she'd first found out, she'd wanted to deny it. It couldn't be true.

And yet it was.

A cry, an anguished wail of grief and despair and denial had torn itself from her throat before she'd collapsed.

This was worse than Anakin being dead.

He was of the Dark now, unreachable and unrecognizable.

And that hurt.

When the Purge had happened, she had felt the pain of thousands of Jedi dying all across the galaxy. Through her bond with Anakin, though weakened through time and space, there had been great pain. She had felt her former master as darkness descended upon the galaxy, felt his pain. And because of that, she had believed him dead, another valiant dead Jedi among thousands.

She had mourned him

But he wasn't dead.

He was responsible for the deaths, for the pain, for the darkness that now ruled over the galaxy with an iron fist. He was responsible for the evil that she fought against.

Except….Anakin would never do these things. Anakin would never slaughter innocents, or terrorize the citizens of the galaxy, or help a Sith Lord take over.

Which meant one thing really.

Anakin, her Anakin, her master, was truly dead. He had died all those years ago, with the Jedi and with the Republic and with Padme.

All that remained was Vader.

A monster in a black suit, a living embodiment of the Dark Side. A symbol of everything her master had once sworn to destroy.

A symbol of what she fought against.

But maybe….

Just maybe…..

Buried far down inside the monster that was Vader…..

Maybe there was some of her master left….

Just maybe…

She could certainly hope so.