Disclamer: None of the characters are mine, especially Alex. If he were mine, i'd be happy forever. Also, if he were real and mine...yum.

A/N: Hey guys! Sorry for the people who reveiwed while this fic was under a different SN, but it's back up! And i also had to wait three days before i could upload anything so... yeah. Anyway, It's my first fic, so don't be too hard! I've only read up to the 4th book because none of our local book stores have Scorpia. It takes place a few years after the Eagle Strike. I really have no idea what to do after this so please give ideas on what to do! I also said that Sabina's dad died, and lets just say he did. At least inthis story. Thanks and i hope you enjoy!

Alex stood by the glass paned window, staring out towards the busy street. His hands were loosely held behind his back and his legs were held slightly apart. To a normal passerby, it would seen as if he were normal teenager, in awe of the shiny cars parked outside of the restaurant he was inside of, but to anyone who knew his real identities, they would see that his eyes were not really staring at anything. They seemed to look off into the distance, as if in deep thought. His eyes were glazed over. The same eyes that had seen so many before him die. The same eyes embalmed with loss, hatred, sadness, making him look as if he were twice as old. They were not the eyes you would expect a normal boy would have, but of course, if you truly knew who he was, you would know that he wasn't a normal boy.

No, not a normal boy.

He was Alex Rider.

Alex Rider, the boy who had suffered through innumerable psychological and physical ordeals that most would never dream of going through. Alex Rider, the superhero, saving the world from countless evil doers. Alex Rider, the hart breaker. Alex Rider, the martyr.

Flashback

"Bye Alex." Blunt said, turning his back to leave.

"So that's it?" He yelled, "That's all I get. Just one measly goodbye? Not even a 'Good Job Alex', or 'Well done! You saved the world again!'?"

Turning slowly around, Blunt asked, "ok then, Good Job Alex. We'll call you if we need you again."

"Oh, is that what you think? Whenever you guys are stuck, call for Alex. He's like a puppet, just pull the right strings and he'll do whatever you want him to. When he needs help, we'll just leave him to die, but we don't care as long as we get what we want."

"Alex, you're overreacting."

"I'm overreacting? I'M OVERREACTING? HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT I'M FUCKIN OVERREACTING WHEN I JUST SAVED YOUR BUTTS FROM GETTING KILLED…AGAIN? YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SAY THAT!"

"Alex, I…"

"YOU WHAT? YOU WANT TO SAY YOU'RE SORRY? Oh, never mind. The great and all-powerful Blunt can never be wrong! I DON'T CARE WHAT THE HELL HAPPENS TO THE WORLD ANYMORE! IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM. Don't you ever feel guilty about sending me away? What does your conscience say to you every time you ship me off to some foreign country? What does your heart tell you each time I ask for help but you just ignore it?"

"Alex, I…I don't know what to say."

"You know, when I was getting ready to go on my first mission, I was truly excited about it. I may not have acted it, but I was. I kept on thinking how cool it would be to follow my Uncle's footsteps. But after I came home, I knew I wanted nothing to do with you or any spy. It wasn't because I almost died. No, It was because I know you didn't care. You didn't care what I went through, you didn't care what I saw. You didn't care about me. You just cared about your stupid society. Whatever. Goodbye Mr. Blunt. If you ever try to contact Jack or me again, you'll be sorry. Trust me."

End of Flashback

The incident had been seven years ago. M-16 had tried to get in touch with Alex a few times but the last time he sent them a bomb through the mail. Because Alex had so much information on the security in

M-16, it had fully infiltrated the detectors and the end results had not gone well for them.

"Alex?" a voice called from behind him.

Slowly turning around, Alex saw a dark-haired young woman. Her body had the slim hourglass figure that many women would kill for. Everything down to her fifty-dollar Chinese Laundry shoes was perfect. Slowly looking up at her face, he knew it was her. Sabina Pleasure.

"Yeah. That's me."

"So, how are you?" Sabina stared at him strait in the eyes. She could tell that he was doing well. His Gucci shirt and his Armani shoes. His hair was still the same, if not longer now. They covered his eyes giving him a mysterious glow. His well-toned chest and arms rippled throughout his body, the white shirt not doing much to hide it. All in all, Sabina could tell that he was perfect in every single way. That is, if you didn't look into his eyes. She could see betrayal hurt etched ever so clearly into them. Though he did the best to hide it, nothing could cover up the pain he had suffered.

"I'm fine." Alex replied, turning away. He gestured to an empty table, "Do you wanna go and sit down?"

"Sure."

They moved over to the table and Alex pulled her chair out. Daintily sitting down, he gently pushed the chair in. Once they were settled, the waiter came over and started talking.

"Would you like any drinks to start off with"

"I'll have a Shirley Temple" Sabina stated.

"I'll have a virgin margarita." Alex said, scanning over the menu.

"Okay, your drinks will be with you in a minute. Now, the special tonight is a lobster and crab dish. It's fresh lobster and crab nixed with olive oil and a dash of red wine. Brushed with a light butter sauce. The dish is very big. Usually advised to share between two people. I'm sure you lovely couple would be quite satisfied with it."

Sabina blushed. "We…we're…we're not…"

"No thank you ma'am. We'll be ready with our orders in a second though." Alex said nonchalantly, still looking at the menu.

'How does he not get embarrassed by that?' Sabina wondered to herself.

After they ordered, Alex sank a little into his chair, sighing in comfort.

"So, what have you been doing lately?" Sabina squirmed in her chair a little, gazing away from Alex's firm stare.

"Nothing much. I just graduated with a masters."

"But, but you're only twenty-one right?"

"Yeah, I got enough college credit in High School that they let me skip a few year."

"Oh, where did you graduate from?"

"MIT"

"Wow. What are you majoring in?"

"Business engineering."

"Oh." Sabina knew that Alex wouldn't make this easier for her.

Flashback

After the incident with Damian Cray, Alex began to grow increasingly guilty. Guilty on so many levels. He felt guilty that he had made Jack worry so much about him. He felt guilty about killing the snake in the video game simulator, heck, he even felt guilty about the twig he broke by stepping on it. But the one constant thing that plagued him every moment of his life was Sabina. Her innocent life was endangered because of him and his actions. His dreams would be filled of flashbacks to that few hours. He would often wake up in sweat, screaming for dear life. Her eyes were like a curse. Always following him around with the terrified look. Finally Alex had had enough. He was just about to go insane with the guilt coated so thickly on him. He called her.

"Hello?" a voice called out.

"Hey, is Sabina there?" Alex asked into the receiver

"Yeah, hold on a minute." The voice answered back.

"…"

"Hey, Sabina here."

"Hi. It's Alex."

"…Rider?"

"Yeah."

"What do you want?" she spat out angrily.

"I… I just wanted to say I'm sorry for everything." Alex thought to himself, I'm sorry Sabina. I'm sorry for being your friend. I'm sorry for dragging you into this. I'm sorry for everything you had to go through because of me. I'm sorry for loving you, and I'm sorry for not being able to let you go. I'm sorry Sabina. I'm so sorry.

"You're sorry? You're sorry?"

"Sab-" Alex's voice was edged with pain and confusion.

Sabina cut him off, " Is that supposed to make it all better? Is everything supposed to miraculously be all better because the strong and mighty Alex Rider said so? Because you didn't tell anyone about that freak Yassen, my father was killed. Because of you, my mom will never fully recover from the shock of the incident in France and from me being kidnapped, you know she's in a hospital right now having a machine pump her heart for her? Because of you, I was almost killed! Because of you, my life will never be the same again, and you say you're sorry?"

"Sabina, I know you're going through a lot right now, and I know that you might think that you're alone, and that you have no one who knows what you're going through, but I know how you're feeling and I-"

"No Alex, you can't even fathom an inkling of what I'm feeling right now. You go through life with a sad story over your head. 'Oh, I'm Alex Rider, my parents were murdered. I miss them so much, I really do!'

Well boo fucking hoo. You have no idea what it's like to miss your parents. You never even knew them! Sure you miss having them around. Sure you wonder what your life would have been like if they were alive, but you never grew up with them. You never depended on them. You never saw them at every waking moment of your life. You never got to know them! So don't tell me that you how I am feeling right now, Alex Mathew Rider, because you don't! You have no idea what it's like to lose someone you love."

"Now that's where you're wrong, Sabina," Alex snarled.

"You know, I used to look up to you, you were always so suave and smart. You never made a mistake and you were perfect. But now, I know you're not perfect. You're far from perfect. Too far to even function. You think you're this tragic story. Oh, my uncle died! Whoop-de-doo!"

Alex was getting angry, he didn't care when she insulted him, but his family was none of her business. "You think I like it? You think I enjoy not having parents or relatives? You think I enjoy being forced to risk my life and come back with no one but my nanny to be waiting? At least you have parents! AT LEAST YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE FUCKING PERSON WHO CARES FOR YOU! You know what? I may not know what it feels like to loose my parents, but that's because I never knew my parents. I never got to see what they looked like in person. I never got to get to know them. Ever! At least you had the pleasure of having them around. God Sabina, I never even got to talk to them!" Alex breathed a few times to settle down. "But I do know what it feels like to loose someone you love. I know what it feels like to have your heart and soul wrenched from you. I know what it feels like to hurt so much that you just want to end your life. Just to have one last glimpse at their face, just to hear their voice one more time. I know that feeling. I've drowned myself far too many times into that feeling." Alex's raw voice stopped.

"I never knew. Alex I'm-" Alex could hear the sadness in Sabina's voice. The regretfulness, but he had to finish what he was saying.

"Ever since I was small, there have been mysterious killings happening around me. People I was friends with, people I admire, people I trust and love. Most of them were all killed. By the age of ten, I was afraid to have any friends because I knew they would be killed. No one ever found out the killer's identity but it didn't matter. They were already dead. The killings stopped once my Uncle was murdered. I actually began to trust people again and you were the first one I let in. I loved you Sabina. But now, I just don't know anymore. If that's what you really think of me, I don't think it would work out anyway. I truly am sorry Sabina. But you had no right to say those things. No right. Goodbye."

"Alex! Wait-" He had hung up.

End of Flashback.

Alex was surprised when he got the phone call from Sabina. It was one of those rare times when he would show any emotion at all.


Please review and help me come up with other ideas for this Fic! Thanks.