Distant Memories

by Blader Aki

Summary: Just Kakashi's memories and thoughts... Read more and find out ^.^

***

Kakashi Hatake woke up in his apartment only to be greeted by the framed photograph sitting on the side table. This weathered, almost faded photo was of his team when he was a child. He still wore the face mask even when he was a child only because he was even "prettier" back then. His teammates were Asuma and that other girl he could really care less about. The most important person in the picture is the one person he had stared at while crying when he was a child. Looking into his sensei's eyes alone brought sad memories of that night...

His sensei... Yondaime [a/n: The Fourth Hokage]... Some days, when he didn't feel like reading 'Itcha Itcha Paradise,' he would slip this photo and act as if it was a bookmark, just trying to remember the days back then...

Glancing at the clock, he was early for his meeting with his team, so he decided to get ready for the day and visit the memorial of dead shinobi... Just to pay his respects...

Every task was almost done in a flash, except for the task he always saved for last: washing his face. He stepped into the small wash closet, and took off his face mask and hitai-ate band, revealing his beautiful, flawless face, except for the scar running down his left eye, in which the sharingan resided... He splashed his face with water, and left the water running, just to stare into the mirror into what he has become.

//It's been a long, long time since I looked into the mirror//

//I guess that I was blind, now my reflection's getting clearer...//

The droplets of water on his face were rolling down his cheeks, giving the emotionless jounin a look of sadness, as if he was crying. He quickly wiped his face with a towel, turned off the water, and wore his hitai-ate band and his face mask once again, and set off to the memorial.

//Now that you're gone, things will never be the same again...//

He arrived at the memorial with the yondaime's name engraved into the stone.

//There's not a minute that goes by every hour of every day, you're such a part of me, but I just pulled away.//

//Now I'm not the same guy [a/n: used to be 'girl' -.-;;] you used to know.//

Just staring at the name engraved into the memorial caused memories to flood back into Kakashi's mind, and he stood there with the dazed expression on his face...

It was not too long ago, probably only twenty years ago, when he was six... He just passed the chuunin exam and was training, once again. Everyone had already left, but he stayed in the rain, training endlessly. Even Gai, who was so determined to defeat him, had left. The only one that stayed behind was his sensei... He was always there. He never had a family of his own, so the yondaime had taken him in and taken care of him like he was his own child...

The rain soon stopped, and his sensei had come out from the shelter underneath the giant oak and went over to Kakashi with a towel.

"You'll get sick if you work too hard."

"I've never gotten sick before in my life. And I never will."

"Just don't worry everyone. They care about you a lot you know."

"Hmph. Name one."

"... Me." At that one word, Kakashi turned away, and simply stood there silently, rooted to the spot. The sight simply amused his sensei so much that he just laughed, ruffling the young chunin's hair, "Kakashi kawaii! Daisuki [I like you a lot.]." and left to go home, not having to tell him where he was going.

//I wish I said the words I never showed.//

Long after his sensei had left, Kakashi turned and faced the direction in which his sensei walked away, and whispered, "Demo orewa kimi o aishiteru... [But I love you...]" Before these five words left his mouth, he disappeared from the spot and left to go home.

But when the young chuuin arrived to the place he called 'home,' he was greeted by something he hadn't expected. The windows were dark and there seemed to be no trace of anyone inside... Kakashi panicked, and entered the house, searching frantically for his sensei. He was only greeted by a note:

Kakashi,

The Kyubi is getting too out of hand. I have to go. It's my mission. Don't worry. I'll be back soon.

The young nin didn't even need a signature to know that this note was written by his sensei and that the Kyubi was a horrible monster... Nine destructive tails and an almost unlimited amount of chakra, and heals almost instantly. No... He knew that his sensei was strong, but against the Kyubi? If he... died... No, he wouldn't be able to stand it. He had to see him again.

Kakashi once again disappeared, leaving the note to fall gently to the floor, while he was running towards the battle cries and howling of the Kyubi.

//I know you had to go away.//

//I died just a little, and I feel that now you're the one I need.//

//I believe that I would cry just a little just to have you back now, here with me.//

//Here with me...//

Kakashi arrived, practically running past the Jounins undetected, and arrived at the scene of the battle. Kyubi against the yondaime... The young Chuuin was somewhat relieved that his sensei was still alive, but alarmed at how much damage he seemed to have taken. He seemed to have taken several blows from the Kyubi, and was about to reach his limit... No... He didn't want this. He didn't tell his sensei how much he was thankful... He couldn't die... He was stronger than this...

"SENSEI!!! MAKERUNA!!! [Don't lose!]"

At these words, the yondaime looked back to see Kakashi, and was alarmed at seeing him in this dangerous battlefield, and thinking how careless the jounin were at letting a kid pass them. The Kyubi was attacking, once again, a direct blow with the target being the yondaime with one of its massive tails, and knowing that Kakashi would get hurt, the sensei took off some blood and quickly summoned 'Gama the Boss,' who quickly blocked the blow, saving both the sensei and Kakashi.

"SOMEONE GET KAKASHI OUT OF HERE!" the yondaime yelled, and no sooner did he yell it, that a jounin appeared and took Kakashi by the waist and carried him away.

"NO! SENSEI!!! SHINUNA!!!! [Don't die!]"

The jounin took Kakashi back to his house, and threw him inside, and used a jutsu to seal the door so he couldn't get out again, and left to go back and assist the yondaime in any way possible.

The masked chuuin had some time to think, so he sat at the table near the door, hoping that he would be able to be the one to welcome his sensei home.

//You know that silence is loud when all you hear is your heart.//

//And I wanted so badly just to be part of something strong and true, but I was scared and left it all behind.//

His sensei never came back, and Kakashi fell asleep at the table, dreaming a wonderful dream of being with his sensei again...

//I know you had to go away.//

Word was that he died in the process of sealing the Kyubi inside a child... But Kakashi was the only one that never accepted that truth... He didn't want to believe it. He didn't want to think that he would never see his sensei again... The only one that cared... His family... He didn't want to be alone again...

//I died just a little, and I feel that now you're the one I need.//

//I believe that I would cry just a little just to have you back now, here with me.//

//Here with me...//

{Kakashi's P.O.V.}

When I finally accepted the truth that you weren't coming back and that you were really dead, and that I was alone again, I decided to become a sensei like you, but not one for akatsuki... No, more like for genins... I'll train them like how you trained me. And hopefully, I'll be able to help a genin like how you helped me... Both in missions and in my life...

//And I'm askin'!//

//And I wanted you to come back to me, please.//

//I never would forget the look upon your face.//

//How you turned away and left without a trace.//

//But I understand that you did what you had to do.//

//And I thank you.//

Hehe... There's finally a group of Genins that I finally took a liking to. It reminds me of my old group, though with more competition... I guess in the old times, this team would've been like me and Gai along with that girl... I guess this team is more like the Three Legendary Nins... Hopefully Sasuke won't turn evil...

Oh yeah, and there's a kid... He reminds me so much of my sensei... Naruto... Even though he's much louder and more obnoxious, and maybe even more careless... But his determination and his looks reminds me so much of you... And his goldenrod hair spiked up naturally in all directions with his azure eyes... He just... reminds me so much of you that I can't stand to look at him, so I usually pay more attention to the other two, but it's hard to since he makes so much progress...

//I know you had to go away.//

//I died just a little, and I feel that now you're the one I need.//

//I believe that I would cry just a little just to have you back now, here with me.//

//Here with me...//

I'll protect him like you protected me.

//I know you had to go away.//

//I died just a little, and I feel that now you're the one I need.//

//I believe that I would cry just a little just to have you back now, here with me.//

//Here with me...//

//Here with me...//

Aishiteru... Sensei...

[a/n: The song is "Here With Me" by Michelle Branch... Duh...]