Flapjacks
It was right after sunset, and the exhibits of the Museum of Natural History were waking up. Octavius was feeling hungry, so he walked over to the Western diorama. He gently rustled on Jedediah's tent flap.
"Hey, Octo! Whatcha need?" Jedediah smiled as he appeared from his tent.
"I should like to try a flapjack," Octavius answered.
"Well, I guess I'll go make some,'' Jedediah said as he went back into his tent.
"I was wondering if you could show me how to make them, perhaps," Octavius wondered as he followed his cowboy friend into the tent.
"Yeah, sure I'll teach ya," Jedediah smirked, "But don't come cryin' to me if I burn the kitchen down."
"Should I worry for my safety?" Octavius inquired.
"Nah, you'll be fine," Jedediah assured his Roman friend.
"You are right, my friend. I should not worry. Now, as they say: 'let's get cooking!'" Octavius said.
"Now you're talkin'!" Jedediah exclaimed.
They walked over to the kitchen.
"Where are your recipe cue cards?" Octavius asked.
"Who uses recipes?" Jedediah questioned.
"Good cooks?" Octavius guessed.
"Look, I ain't gonna use a recipe. I can't follow directions; they bore me," Jedediah replied.
"So do you even measure anything out?" Octavius inquired.
"Nah, I just dump an amount of uh… what's the word again?" Jedediah explained.
"Ingredients?" Octavius supplied.
"Yeah, whatever. I just dump random amounts in," Jedediah continued explaining.
"I see," Octavius frowned.
"Let's just cook before we start playing 20 Questions," Jedediah groaned.
"What's that?" Octavius asked in a confused tone.
"A game I should never teach you," Jedediah remarked, "Let's just cook."
Jedediah went over to the pantry. He grabbed flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, nutmeg, butter, eggs, milk, and vanilla extract. Then, he grabbed a bowl.
"Alright Octo, pour some flour in the bowl," Jedediah instructed.
"How much?" Octavius asked.
"Uh… like three handfuls," Jedediah guesstimated.
"Ok," Octavius said as he put three handfuls of flour in the bowl.
"Alright, then put in about one and a half handfuls of sugar," Jedediah said.
"Isn't this unsanitary?" Octavius asked.
"Why do ya think that?" Jed questioned.
"Well, I just stuck my hand in a bag of flour that you could use later," Octavius explained.
"So?" Jedediah said in a 'Why does that matter' tone.
"Well, you could get germs!" Octavius exclaimed.
"It's fine, just add the sugar," Jedediah replied, brushing off the comment.
"Ok," Octavius said, doing as he was told.
"Then add a handful of baking powder, half a handful of salt, and a fourth of the nutmeg," Jedediah instructed.
"Alright, now what do I do?" Octavius wondered.
"Whisk it," Jedediah said.
"How do you whisk something?" Octavius inquired.
"Ya stir it with a whisk, it's like a fancy schmansy spoon. Just let me do it," Jedediah explained as he began whisking the ingredients.
"Can you go get another bowl?" Jedediah asked a few moments later.
"Yes," Octavius answered as he got a smaller bowl.
Octavius followed the rest of Jed's instructions. Beat two eggs and whisk it with a random amount he was told to pour in of milk and vanilla. Without fail, Octavius spilled some on himself.
"Um, Jedediah, it appears that I have spilled some batter on myself," Octavius blurted out.
"Uh, I figured this would happen. Grab that rag over there and clean yourself up," Jedediah said.
"Uh yes. Ok," Octavius said in a 'I could've thought of that' tone.
"Alright, now I'm going to melt the butter on a cast iron skillet," Jedediah explained.
After that was done, Octavius added the butter to the batter with milk. Then, he added the flour batter to that. It became nice and thick.
"Alright, now you're gonna pour some of the batter onto the skillet," Jedediah instructed.
"How much?" Octavius wondered.
"Um… let's say about a fourth of it, so we can each have two," Jedediah answered.
"I didn't know you were good in math," Octavius joked, knowing the cowboy wasn't.
"Well, I ain't but… Hey! What's that 'posed to mean?!" Jedediah rambled on.
"I just know you don't like math, but you're talking about fractions, Jedediah," Octavius smiled.
"Nah, it goes farther than just strongly dislikin' it! I hate it!" Jedediah whined.
"That's probably why you can't read Roman numerals," Octavius groaned.
"Well it's just a bunch o' I's, V's, and X's," Jedediah reasoned.
"No, my friend, believe it or not, they mean something," Octavius explained.
"Yeah, I don't care. All o' this math talk is bummin' me out, so let's eat!" Jedediah said as Octavius finished cooking.
"Jedediah," Octavius started to say.
"Yeah," Jedediah said.
"You lied to me," Octavius smiled.
"Bout what?" Jedediah asked.
"This is not like a biscuit or a scone like you told me," Octavius complained.
"I was tryin' to relate it ta things I knew you prolly ate," Jedediah explained.
"Jedediah, you could've said that they were like pancakes. I have had them before. Pancakes I mean," Octavius stated.
"Mmkay. I'll try ta keep that in mind the next time I explain stuff ta ya," Jedediah commented as he made a mental note to himself.
"Well, I am enjoying my flapjack," Octavius said.
"I told ya it would turn out fine without a recipe," Jedediah smirked.
"That you did my friend, that you did," Octavius replied.
"Maybe someday ya can teach me how to make some of that weird Roman food ya eat," Jedediah suggested.
"As you wish. But you need to know that you would have to follow a recipe," Octavius informed his cowboy friend.
"Ugh. But I guess I'll be willing ta try it since ya had to cook using my non recipe ways," Jedediah reasoned.
"Gods help me," Octavius muttered to himself.
Author's Note: I hoped you enjoyed my first Night at the Museum fanfic! I definitely enjoyed writing this and I hoped you enjoyed reading it! I just enjoy the Octavius and Jedediah bromance so much. I think I captured everyone well, and I hope I made you laugh. Remember, all reviews are appreciated and I would like to hear all feedback and or comments. Thanks for reading! ;) ;)
