It's not easy being God you know. You have no idea what you have to go through when you're all high and mighty. Some people say 'Oh, but you're God! You can do anything! You have no worries!' Well, have they ever had to clean up after a giant Tiger while he was busy throwing his shit at your people?

I swear, it's always 'We need food!' this or 'We need more homes!' that. Why don't they get off their lazy asses and do something themselves? Arg! Then there's the problems with the freaks and the nutjobs, having to make sur they get their due end and bring them to justice as best as I can. Which usually involves a tree, a few large rocks and a nice little trip into the ocean. The people seem to act real nice and happy when four people are chucked into the briney depths for being annoying.

Some people are so ingrateful too, always contesting your opinion and bothering you. I mean seriously, 'Your monster isn't big enough! Bring it to me when he gets bigger!'. Oh yeah bud? I made the mountain you rest your sorry ass on, so how about you go do something rather than be a complete fruit cake. Let's see how small my monster is when he goes bowling with your front door, biatch!

Man oh man, it's like these people have never defended themselves before. I mean, it's not like a giant boulder barrelling directly at your face is hard to dodge, but they seem to enjoy facial rearrangement a la stone and take it in the jaw like a real hero. Some people these are. A nation of broken jaws.

Then there's the rival Gods. Rival Gods, really. There's more then one? I didn't know that, but I have to make it that way. Their towns are always so much better, it's obvious they don't discipline their people. I mean, who has time to build nice houses when you're constantly being struck by lightning, hit with rocks and thrown into forests? Not my people. They love and respect me. If they don't, well, let's just say Rocky XXVII.

What nuisance I face! Some hermit guy was complaining all day, so I set him on fire and threw him at an enemy city. Needless to say my Little Flaming Prophet was all that was needed to help tip the scales in my favour as their new god as his burning body ignited everything he came in contact with, which I made sure was everything. It's fun being a God sometimes, but it really sucks ass to have to carry a flaming man around to pass the word to your enemies that you're not playing around. Maybe a little mass destruction would do them some good.

These people are so destructive! They've levelled all my forests and have nothing left, meanwhile my enemy enjoys happytime while he plunders his many forests while I have no wood. Maybe next time I'll construct the island in my favour and put all the forests on my side.