This plot bunny came to me last night, it's a little one shot in response to the Season 11 premier taping report. Be warned, this is not intended for Shamy fans.
"What have you done?" Amy cried, as she knelt over her fiance's body on the floor of 4A. The dark haired man was breathing steadily but had been knocked unconscious.
"I told him not to touch the back panel of the motherboard but you know what he's like, he thinks he knows everything about engineering." Howard grimaced shamefully, as his wife quickly squeezed his hand in comfort. "No one blames you, Howie…." She said, throwing a warning scowl towards the others gathered around Sheldon's limp body. "DO THEY!" she growled.
"No-oo-oo…" Raj stuttered nervously.
"No, of course not," Penny said, titling her head to get a better view of the man at her feet, lying flat out on his back. Aside from a little blackening to the fingertips of his right hand where the electricity had found an entry point, he looked peaceful.
"There must be a faulty wire somewhere," Leonard said, pulling the plug from the socket.
"Is he going to be okay?" Raj asked.
"Sure." Amy placed a hand to Sheldon's neck. "He's just had a little shock but his vitals are strong."
"Great!" Howard clapped his hands together to signal an end to the matter. "Let's start the movie."
"Howard!" Bernadette snapped. "We can't just leave Sheldon lying on the floor while we watch TV!"
"I say we enjoy the peace while we can." Leonard chuckled and sat back down in the armchair.
"If we start watching the movie now, we can avoid his annoying commentary about the error in the opening sequence." Howard added, and the guys all exchanged hopeful glances.
"Anyone want a beer?" Raj grinned.
"I'll move all this out of the way." Howard said, gesturing at the offending machine, which had caused Sheldon's electric shock. Penny continued to stare at the man passed out in front of the coffee table. "He looks.. weird," she said.
"Weird how?" Amy said a little concerned.
"Not Sheldon-weird, just a little… different."
At that moment the man stirred. "He's coming round." Leonard said.
"Ahh darn it!" Howard huffed.
Sheldon's head stirred and a furrow began on his brow before he even opened his eyes. Then slowly, squinting, he began to wake up.
"Are you okay, Sheldon?" Penny asked.
Making eye contact with the blonde standing over him he said. "W-what are you doing up there?"
"You're on the floor, Sheldon?"
"Oh!" the tall man shot up into a seated position and quickly placed a hand to his forehead, his head aching horribly.
"Sorry Sheldon," Howard started to explain, "But I told you not to touch it." He sat down next to Bernadette on the edge of the couch.
"Touch what?"
"The motherboard, it's not earthed." He said, gesturing to the equipment now safely unplugged on the coffee table.
"Why on earth would I touch an unearthed mother….," His voice trailed off as he saw the unfamiliar mechanical contraption next to where he had fallen, he then turned to his companions, looking from one to the other with the most perplexed expression.
Amy placed a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay Sheldon?"
He scowled back at the woman kneeing next to him. "Who are you?" he spat.
Struck dumb for a second she responded. "It's me, Amy, your fiancé."
"Don't be ridiculous."
Amy gasped. "Sheldon, it's me. You've just hit her head or something."
"I don't know you." He pulled himself into a standing position a little too quickly and swayed to the left. Penny shot out a stabilizing hand to stop him tumbling over.
"Sheldon…. Sweetie," she said. "You've had a bit of a shock."
"Penny…?"
"Yes?"
"You're touching me." His stern manner caused the blonde to instinctly pull her hand back. She knew that tone but hadn't heard him speak that way in a very long time.
"We were just about to watch…" Leonard started.
"Yes I know…" Sheldon interrupted. "…Saturn 3."
"No, not Saturn 3," he grimaced. "Rogue One."
"Rogue what?"
"You know? The new Star Wars movie." Raj said with a happy grin.
Sheldon looked extremely pertrubed at this comment. "You know the penalty for watching prequels in this apartment. We rarely, if ever, sanction prequels. That's one strike Leonard" He began to shift his weight nervously from one foot to the other.
"Sheldon," Leonard reassured. "We would never watch those Star Wars movies, you know how we feel about writers who lose their vision. Come on buddy, you know Rogue One. You love it."
"I know nothing of the sort." He marched purposely to his spot and perched on the edge, frowning at DVD menu page, which clearly advertised 'Rogue One'.
"It's ganna be one of those nights." Howard rolled his eyes.
"Maybe we should get a doctor," Amy said, a worried crease between her brows.
"Who is this person?" he asked the others.
"It's your fiancé." Bernadette replied.
"Stop saying that!"
"It's true," Amy pleaded. "We're engaged."
"Why on earth would I have a fiancé?"
"He's got me!" Howard mocked, never understanding why Amy stuck around so long, or why Sheldon had continued to date her in the first place.
"You had a meeting of minds," Leonard offered, and Sheldon frowned back at him.
"We also have a meeting of minds," he said earnestly "Do you suggest that we get engaged?"
"Of course not."
"Well then."
"But I've been in your life seven years, we fell in love," Amy growled, becoming increasing agitated.
"Love is an artificial construct designed to encourage us to procreate. As there are already 6,846,479,521 human beings on this planet, give or take..."
"Give or take…" Raj mocked.
"…I see no pressing need to add to that number." He finished. "Now the roommate agreement states…"
"Oh gawdddd, not this again," Howard groaned.
"But Sheldon you must remember me?" Amy tried once more. "We're getting married."
He looked the woman up and down and said. "I certainly hope not."
Amy's mouth dropped and when he didn't respond with his usual confusion over displeasing her, she grabbed up her bag and stormed out the front door.
"Well, that wasn't very nice." Bernadette said accusingly at the lanky man.
"I should think not, she was extremely pedestrian. Suffering from several genetic flaws, as the orthopaedic shoes, spectacles and terribly hunched shoulders would suggest. If I ever bless the planet with my offspring, I would prefer the subject be a little more genetically sound. Almost a…."
"Homo Novus?" Penny asked.
"Exactly Penny, how unusually astute."
Leonard puzzled at the sudden change in behaviour and offered his own theory. "You seem to be suffering from amnesia." Which was quickly greeted by a condescending glare.
"Leonard." He replied, in a tone the shorter man had long forgotten. "Don't you think if I were suffering from amnesia, that I would know it?"
"Oh brother!" Raj sighed.
Penny approached the couch and perched herself next to him. "Sweetie, what's the last thing you remember?"
He turned big pupils at her and declared. "Fig Newtons..." Snapping his fingers. "I'd been teaching you physics?"
"That was years ago." Penny said. "Don't you remember trying to move a panel on Howard's thingy machine?"
"No…I-I…"
Leonard began another tactic. "What year is it?"
"Oh for heavens sake Leonard! It's 2009, of course."
"Oh crap." Penny said.
They quickly exchanged nervous looks and Leonard wrung his hands together to prepare for delivering the news. "Sheldon, this may come as a bit of a shock," he said. "…but it's not 2009…"
The tall man straightened.
"It's 2017."
With bird-like observation, the physicist studied the quiet room, taking in the unfamiliar attire of the people he thought he knew best, the lines of age, the few extra pounds on Leonard's waist which were not present before he fell into his unexpected sleep. Their theory seemed sound and as the reality began to dawn on him, he started to buzz with excitement.
"Do we have robots assistants in the future?" he hushed.
"Err no…" Penny said, "We have convenience stores with cashier-free service."
He grimaced. "I take it swine flu hasn't wiped out half the planet and caused a zombie apocalypse?"
"Nope."
"Oww!" He was rather deflated by this one. "Did the Russians find a way to make element 114 last?"
"Yes, all 90 atoms of her." Leonard confirmed.
Sheldon gasped. "Well this is just fabulous! I'm just like Alexander Hartdegen in the Time Machine, being thrust into a futurist world, where everything has advanced, developed, improved. Tell me, what did I miss?" he bounced excitedly, in his spot.
"We got married." Bernadette said.
"Huh!"
"..and we had a daughter and now another one on the way." Howard said, patting Bernadette's stomach.
"Did you not hear me say 6,846,479,521 billion humans!" he shook his head in dismay.
"It's more like 7.5 billion now." Raj corrected.
"Oh dear lord!" Sheldon said.
Bernadette's lips tightened but Sheldon, aware that 9 billion could spell the end of civilisation itself, simply ignored her ignorance.
"And we got married too." Penny said, with a thin smile at her husband.
Sheldon let out a short and breathy chuckle of disbelief.
"No, we did?!" her face dropped.
"So do I have the Nobel prize yet?"
"Na-dah!" Howard said.
"Owwww!"
"I'm afraid not." Leonard said. "But we worked on a secret project for the military, with Howard?"
"We all worked together?" he sounded offended at the very suggestion.
"Until it went missing."
"And that's it? Eight years of my life." he said, disappointed.
"No, yoooou had sex!" Howard teased, with a raised eyebrow.
The thin man recoiled from Howard's gurning face and turned towards his roommate sitting in the armchair next to him. "Leonard... is this true?" A little tension rising at the back of his throat.
"Yes, it is buddy," Leonard said softly, trying not to spook the skittish man. "But it's okay…"
"It is? I thought you'd be furious."
Leonard clouded over in confusion. "Why would I be furious?"
Sheldon shot a quick glance at the green eyed blonde next to him and flushed lightly. "I'm sorry Penny, I don't recall our dalliance but I assure that whatever happened between us was simply an inevitability..."
"It wasn't Penny!" Leonard spat, a little too quickly and nervous chuckles and denials sounded about the room.
"Oh, who then?"
"It was Amy." Penny corrected.
"Huh?"
"That girl you just set packing out the door five minutes ago," Bernadette reminded him.
"Her? Was I inebriated?"
"No, you were in love." Raj said.
"Well I'm glad that's forgotten."
"Your memory might come back!" Bernadette growled angrily.
"I sure hope not." He stiffened. "Can't you tell me anything good about the last eight years?"
Everyone wracked their brains to think of something that Sheldon from 2009 might think of as "good" about his current situation and when they came up blank, it was Raj who spoke first, weakly pointing to the TV screen. "Rogue One?" This raised a slow steady smile on Sheldon's face.
"Of course." He was positively glowing now.
"But aren't you freaked out? Shouldn't you be going to the hospital, so you can recover your memory? You've just lost 8 years of your life." Howard reminded him.
"Certainly not," he screwed up his nose in disgust. Then, as if something had only just occurred to him, he asked the blonde, quietly. "Are you sure it wasn't you?"
Penny was about to set the record straight when Sheldon's gaze struck her and something powerful passed between them. This was not the child-like idiot who had burdened their lives over the last eight years and it wasn't quite the man from 2009, either. He was almost flirting with her. And she liked it.
"Hush now." He announced to the room. "I've got an awful lot of sci-fi to catch up on."
