So if you haven't noticed I do like doing song fics. I just love how so many songs out there have such deep meanings and can be connected to Bella & Jacob's love story….or at least the love story I wish they had. For this one, I am not including the lyrics. The song inspired me for this story but doesn't need to be included. If you listen to it while you read it though, it may enhance the story. The song is "Break Even" by The Script. If you haven't heard any of their other songs, I highly recommend their album, The Script. It's amazing!

This one-shot takes place during the wedding in Breaking Dawn but Jacob is not attending. It is depressing but I wrote this as if Jacob never came to the wedding but was home when it happened. I assume his mind would not have been a happy place so enjoy.

I don't own Twilight or The Script, although I would love to own both!


Jacob's POV

I was sitting at home clutching that little piece of paper in my hands. I couldn't believe such a small piece of paper could so drastically alter my life and crush my soul. The fight had gone out of me; I had lost. She chose him and as I was sitting here she was pledging her life to that bloodsucker. She would be one of them soon enough and I would be dead inside. My heart would be broken into a million pieces, unrepairable by anything or anyone.

Tears streamed down my face as I pictured her beautiful skin turning as white as ash. No longer would be body feel warm pressed up against me nor would I see that blush creep up her face when something embarrassed her, which was usually often and easily done. Her heart, such a significant sound in my world, would cease to beat, leaving me in deafening silence while he got to enjoy her for eternity. I crumbled the invitation up and threw it across the room as I began to sob uncontrollably. My whole body shook with the emotions pouring out of me at the lost of my first love, the only girl I will ever love. Is this how it feels to lose your soul mate? Does it feel like your whole body is being torn apart and your heart shredded? I could barely breathe the pain was so crushing.

Now I have all the time in the world to sit and wonder if I could have done more. She will be freed from whatever guilt she feels toward crushing me, which can't be that much or she wouldn't be on that altar today. All my happy memories include her. I can't go anywhere without having my head filled with her smile, laughter, scent….my world is tainted by her.

Sleep has been something I have learned to live without because the dreams torment me when I close my eyes. Sometimes I dream of her with me, I picture our family together. Other dreams have her with blood red eyes stalking me while I wander through the darkness unable to change. Why does my bed feel so cold without her next to me even though we've never shared it-the loss of that possibility makes it feel so empty?

How can you stand to be with him? Cold and hard as stone when you've known what it's like to be with a living breathing person. Why are you so willing to give up everything in your life for him when you could have it all and more with me?

Jake's face was so streaked with tears and voice raw from crying. He wasn't sure he would ever overcome the pain coursing through his body. He imagined they had already said the vows that would seal her fate, that would tie her to him, make her his. His body was hit with another round of tears, each worse than the rest as his brain fully processed that he had lost her.

After he left, I was there to put you back together. I saw what it did to you to even think his name yet you've done the same to me. I am shattered lying on the floor and no one is here to put me back together. Where are you now? You broke me into so many pieces that I will never be put back together again. How could you just take him back after all that?

My dad always used to say, "Everything happens for a reason son." What was the reason behind this? What could possibly have been your motivation to leave me like this, how will things ever be right again? You have a new family and have moved on to this life you think you want but I'm left here-standing still, never moving from this spot. Every day we spent together was the best day of my life; working in the garage, warm sodas, walks on the beach, riding our motorcycles, kidnapping you from school, kissing you and you punching me; the list goes on and on but it means nothing to you. You threw it all away for a pretty white dress, immortality and his last name. Was it worth it?

You have both of our hearts, he took his with him when he left but yet you held onto it while he was gone. Then you took mine too even though you knew you never wanted it; you took it and made it yours and now I'm left with a hollow chest and you got what you wanted. You don't feel any pain yet I'm left with it all.

Jake was curled on the floor holding himself together. He was having a hard time breathing, he body was shaking so hard. He saw the crumpled invitation across the floor reminding him of what was happening. He could see the print, 'Isabella Marie Swan and Edward Cullen cordially invite you to the unions of their families on this blessed day of marriage.' She would be Mrs. Cullen now, finally lost to him.

He pulled himself upright only to crumple to the floor feeling his heart shatter for the last time. He was on the ground in this position when the door opened. The person stood there for a while just looking at the broken man on the floor. Jake didn't care whom it was, the pack knew to leave him alone, that nothing they could say would make this better.

He assumed whoever it was would eventually leave, seeing how much pain he was in. He could feel them standing there, could hear the heart beating as if they had been running. Something sounded familiar and it broke through the haze in his head. He looked up and just saw a blur through the tears. He wiped his eyes and looked again, unable to process what stood before him.

He had finally snapped this was it; he was finished. There was no way what he was seeing was real. There in front of him stood Bella in a white dress with her hair all disheveled. Her face was stained with tears and the bottom of her dress was mud stained.

He just stared at her, willing the image to go away so he could be alone and not think. He realized the heartbeat he was hearing was coming from the image of Bella standing in front of him. He sat up but was still unable to form words.

"Jake? Are you ok? Oh God Jake, I'm so sorry." Bella moved toward him and wrapped him up in her arms the best she could. She held on so tight; Jake could feel the pieces being held together by her arms. She was so warm; he couldn't believe his imagination was this creative. He felt her placing feather light kisses on his head and neck. She pulled him even closer to her and whispered in his ear, "I couldn't do it. I couldn't marry him."

Jake pulled away and stared at her face wondering if this was one more trick she was playing. The tears streaming down her face and sincere look in her eyes made Jacob wake up and realize this was real. Bella was here and telling him she wasn't married. She had left her wedding.

"Bella." His voice was ragged from crying. "Bella, what do you mean? What's happening?"

"I left. I ran out of the ceremony. I made it about halfway down the aisle until I realized what I was doing was wrong. I may have wanted it once but something changed in my life that I couldn't give up. You Jacob, you showed me a life without sacrifices and grief. I choose you. Well, only if you want me. I know what I've done to you. Actually I take that back. Seeing you on the floor made me realize I never truly understood how much I hurt you. I hate myself for everything I've done to you and hope you can forgive me. I love you Jacob Black and hope you will give me just one more chance. I love you so much."

Jacob pulled away from her to look in her eyes and saw everything she said was true. He grabbed her and crushed her to him. He never wanted to let go. He kissed her forehead and leaned his against hers. "I love you too. Oh god Bella I thought I had lost you. I love you so much." He grabbed her face with his hands and kissed her with all he head. She was kissing him back with as much passion and he felt all the pieces of himself snap back together never to be broken again. "Welcome home honey."


They laid on the floor where Bella found Jacob wrapped up in each other's arms not wanting to let go. This was where Charlie and Billy found them sleeping hours later, still wrapped up in each other's arms. Charlie noticed how peaceful his daughter's face appeared and the glow Jacob's face had. He smiled and was glad those two had finally found each other. Noticing something out of the corner of his eye, he reached down and picked up a crumpled piece of paper. He opened it and saw it was Bella's wedding invitation. Glancing back at the two on the floor, he tore it up and threw it away.