How I Will Remember You should have ended
Author: Jag-Fel
Genre: Romance-Angst
Characters: Buffy and Angel
Setting: Angel, season 1
Disclaimer: The episode and the lines recognizable from the episode itself
are copyrighted to Josh Whedon, not me. The concept is just a continuation
of Mr. Whedon's initial story.
Prologue
As Angel walked down the stairs in his sparse apartment, he couldn't keep the shame from he face. His heart was breaking with the look on Buffy Summers' face, as she vainly tried to identify the look on her now-mortal lover's face. Buffy's light comment about his look not involving a lack of orange juice at the store only made his decision burn more.
Angel tried to explain, "I just . . ."
Buffy's look turned from aloof to stern and suspicious; "Where have you been?"
Angel glanced aside to hide his shame, but pressed himself on. "I went to see the Oracles," he hesitated. "I asked them to turn me back."
Buffy blinked, disbelieving, and her eyes widened. She didn't know what to say, but the words that came to her lips were, "What? Why?"
He noticed that Buffy was inching away from him, "Because more than ever I know how much I love you."
Buffy was still backing away, and Angel inched toward her. She turned her back, walking away, and said: "No, no, you didn't."
Whatever passed for the vampire's heart was breaking, "If I stay mortal, one of us will wind up dead; maybe both of us. You heard what Mohra said."
Buffy's soul cried out for this to all be some elaborate dream, anything to make the moment not true. "Mohra's gone. We killed him!"
The vampire-with-a-soul's voice remained steady, even though his soul was all but, "He said more will come."
Both people knew the tears were coming, but Buffy ignored them, "They always come, and they always will, but that's my problem, not yours, remember?"
"No, I won't just stand by and let you fight, maybe die, alone," Angel shook his head adamantly.
Buffy stepped forward, hoping to convince Angel, "Then we fight together."
"Buffy, you saw what happened last night: if anything, I'm a liability to you," Angel half-sighed, then walked passed her. "You take chances to protect me, and that's not just bad for you, that's bad for the people; it's bad for the people we were meant to protect."
The tears were now screaming to be released onto her cheeks, "So, what? You just took twenty-four hours to weigh the ups-and-downs of being an regular Joe, and decided it was more fun being a superhero?" She knew she was using this new frustration to hide her fear, her flailing hope, and her grief.
Buffy's cynical words threatened to cut Angel open, even though he knew they were bred out of grief rather than honest anger, "You know that's not it." He put a hand on his hip and leaned forward, "How can we be together if the cost is your life . . . or the lives of others?"
The tears in Buffy's liquid blue eyes had reached the breaking point, and were now spilling out in a flood onto her cheeks. Angel's immortal heart fell in on itself, and he was thrown into desperation to stop the pain he had committed on this women he loved more than anything. He crossed the space to her in a step, and clutched her to him, her face nesting against his strong chest.
"I, I couldn't tell you," he could feel his own tears coming now, and his words started with a sniff, his hands held her head tight to his chest, and stroked her hair. "I wasn't sure if I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning."
She choked off a tear-muffled, "I understand." Then, she pulled back; so she could see his face, search his features for an answer. A tear broke loose, and ran down her cheek. "So, what happens now?"
"The Oracles are giving us back the day, turning back the day so I can kill Mohra before his blood makes me mortal."
Buffy gulped, with a sudden apprehension filling her, "When?"
Angel was holding back his own flood of tears, as his soul threatened to rip him wide open. He glanced at the clock, 9:59. "Another minute."
Buffy's eyes went wide, and her heart clenched. She could hardly speak, could hardly breathe, "A minute?" she gasped. Everything in her very being threatened to collapse in on itself, "No, no. It's not enough time!" she cried.
He shook his head, "We don't have a choice, it's done."
Buffy didn't know what to do, "How am I supposed to go on with my life, knowing what we had . . . what we could have had?"
Angel's own soul was falling, "You won't. No one will know but me."
She couldn't believe it, "Everything we did?"
Angel replied swiftly, before his tears could answer, "It never happened."
Tears ran freely down the Slayer's face, "It did, it did, I know it did!" His eyes searched for hers, but she was looking at his chest, and her hand slid across, where his heartbeat should have been. "I felt your heartbeat . . ."
Angel still stared down at her, and now she looked up, "Buffy . . ." he looked into huge tear-filled blue eyes, and saw every moment of his two centuries evaporate, leaving on this moment, here, with Buffy.
Neither person could say anymore, and the moment escalated into a desperate kiss. Each fed the link with all the passion and love they could, as if the loving gesture could make the minute last for all time. They broke off, only six seconds left.
Buffy couldn't contain herself, her very soul wanted to tear free, "Oh, God. It's not enough time . . ."
Angel pulled Buffy close again, and said; "Please . . ." followed by, "Bye . . ."
"I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never forget," Buffy murmured into Angel's chest, tears raining from her eyes.
Angel held Buffy as tightly as he could, and clenched his eyes in fear of the moment when the greatest day of his existence would end . . .
The world flashed, and everything went white.
Then Angel opened his eyes.
Buffy was across the room, saying her goodbye. At least, she did twenty-four hours ago. Now, Buffy Summers was right in front of him, clinging tightly to his strong shoulders. Angel blinked, tears still fresh in his eyes. What's going on? Angel held Buffy at arm-length, and looked at her. Her mascara had run, and he could see the subtle lines traced by tears. Her blue eyes were still full of tears, but she was beginning to realize what he was. Buffy's lower lip trembled and looked at her lover, "What happened, Angel?" He backed away from Buffy and searched the room franticly, "I don't know, Buffy . . . let's pay the Oracles another visit, shall we?"
Epilogue
The demon-slaying duo stood just outside the entrance to the Realm of the Oracles, where just earlier that day Doyle had shown Angel how to gain audience with the Oracles. As Angel readied the spell ingredients that would activate the portal, Buffy shivered, and clutched her shoulders to preserve body heat. Angel, while enrapt in his task at hand, had more attention on Buffy, and reached out to squeeze her hand. "These chambers aren't heated. Here," Angel offered Buffy his overcoat. The ingredients were complete, and the room flashed. The portal was open, and Angel looked at Buffy, "You ready?" he asked. Buffy nodded, and they walked into the presence of the Oracles, holding hands tightly . . . unwilling to be separated.
The chamber was sparse, an ancient temple maybe. The walls were as stone, and a grand corridor led away from the portal. Before Buffy and Angel, two gold-skinned beings regarded the lovers with a curious, but all-knowing gaze. "You have come for the answer," the female said, while her male counterpart said no word. Angel nodded, and received a loving squeeze on his hand, "We have. Why weren't the twenty-four hours rewound until before Mohra's blood mixed with mine?" Now, the male oracle spoke, "You were told that since this is a matter of love, we would have no part of it." "You proved that you were no lesser being, and in such, proved that love was of our cause. We have granted you a rare gift; because it is indeed that the forces of darkness are growing. You asked if Mohra spoke the truth, and we told you as much as any could be told. Your love binds you both together, and is your greatest strength. We will not lose a warrior from our cause; thus, we have turned you back into a demon with a soul. But, warrior, there are conditions on this gift, if you accept: one, you will no longer be burdened with the curse you have carried for centuries, and two, you will be as human, but always a vampire. Your soul will remain with you always, never will you and it be separated," the female oracle hesitated. "Can you accept these conditions?" Angel looked at Buffy, who spoke up, "He will possess the same powers and strengths he had as a vampire, but will be in all likeness, human?" The male oracle nodded, "It is so, but as he carries the strengths of a vampire, he also carries the weaknesses therein," he turned to concentrate on Angel. "You will still be unable to walk in the daylight, a stake though your heart will end your being, and you will be victim to all other banes of vampires." The female cocked her head, "Will you accept these conditions?" Angel nodded once, and said, "I will. Thank you." The oracles both inclined their heads, and then were gone. The duo was returned to Angel apartment.
Angel turned to Buffy, who kept a short distance behind him, and smiled, "We can finally be together." Buffy beamed, "We'll make it work, right? We made it though this - you're not cursed anymore - we can make it though anything." Pulling her close, holding her tight, Angel nodded, "We'll be together forever, and we'll fight together."
After years of torture, the once-forbidden love of Buffy Summers and Angel would become possible, and they were now able to have normal lives.well, except for the obvious vampire-ness and demon-slayage.
Prologue
As Angel walked down the stairs in his sparse apartment, he couldn't keep the shame from he face. His heart was breaking with the look on Buffy Summers' face, as she vainly tried to identify the look on her now-mortal lover's face. Buffy's light comment about his look not involving a lack of orange juice at the store only made his decision burn more.
Angel tried to explain, "I just . . ."
Buffy's look turned from aloof to stern and suspicious; "Where have you been?"
Angel glanced aside to hide his shame, but pressed himself on. "I went to see the Oracles," he hesitated. "I asked them to turn me back."
Buffy blinked, disbelieving, and her eyes widened. She didn't know what to say, but the words that came to her lips were, "What? Why?"
He noticed that Buffy was inching away from him, "Because more than ever I know how much I love you."
Buffy was still backing away, and Angel inched toward her. She turned her back, walking away, and said: "No, no, you didn't."
Whatever passed for the vampire's heart was breaking, "If I stay mortal, one of us will wind up dead; maybe both of us. You heard what Mohra said."
Buffy's soul cried out for this to all be some elaborate dream, anything to make the moment not true. "Mohra's gone. We killed him!"
The vampire-with-a-soul's voice remained steady, even though his soul was all but, "He said more will come."
Both people knew the tears were coming, but Buffy ignored them, "They always come, and they always will, but that's my problem, not yours, remember?"
"No, I won't just stand by and let you fight, maybe die, alone," Angel shook his head adamantly.
Buffy stepped forward, hoping to convince Angel, "Then we fight together."
"Buffy, you saw what happened last night: if anything, I'm a liability to you," Angel half-sighed, then walked passed her. "You take chances to protect me, and that's not just bad for you, that's bad for the people; it's bad for the people we were meant to protect."
The tears were now screaming to be released onto her cheeks, "So, what? You just took twenty-four hours to weigh the ups-and-downs of being an regular Joe, and decided it was more fun being a superhero?" She knew she was using this new frustration to hide her fear, her flailing hope, and her grief.
Buffy's cynical words threatened to cut Angel open, even though he knew they were bred out of grief rather than honest anger, "You know that's not it." He put a hand on his hip and leaned forward, "How can we be together if the cost is your life . . . or the lives of others?"
The tears in Buffy's liquid blue eyes had reached the breaking point, and were now spilling out in a flood onto her cheeks. Angel's immortal heart fell in on itself, and he was thrown into desperation to stop the pain he had committed on this women he loved more than anything. He crossed the space to her in a step, and clutched her to him, her face nesting against his strong chest.
"I, I couldn't tell you," he could feel his own tears coming now, and his words started with a sniff, his hands held her head tight to his chest, and stroked her hair. "I wasn't sure if I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning."
She choked off a tear-muffled, "I understand." Then, she pulled back; so she could see his face, search his features for an answer. A tear broke loose, and ran down her cheek. "So, what happens now?"
"The Oracles are giving us back the day, turning back the day so I can kill Mohra before his blood makes me mortal."
Buffy gulped, with a sudden apprehension filling her, "When?"
Angel was holding back his own flood of tears, as his soul threatened to rip him wide open. He glanced at the clock, 9:59. "Another minute."
Buffy's eyes went wide, and her heart clenched. She could hardly speak, could hardly breathe, "A minute?" she gasped. Everything in her very being threatened to collapse in on itself, "No, no. It's not enough time!" she cried.
He shook his head, "We don't have a choice, it's done."
Buffy didn't know what to do, "How am I supposed to go on with my life, knowing what we had . . . what we could have had?"
Angel's own soul was falling, "You won't. No one will know but me."
She couldn't believe it, "Everything we did?"
Angel replied swiftly, before his tears could answer, "It never happened."
Tears ran freely down the Slayer's face, "It did, it did, I know it did!" His eyes searched for hers, but she was looking at his chest, and her hand slid across, where his heartbeat should have been. "I felt your heartbeat . . ."
Angel still stared down at her, and now she looked up, "Buffy . . ." he looked into huge tear-filled blue eyes, and saw every moment of his two centuries evaporate, leaving on this moment, here, with Buffy.
Neither person could say anymore, and the moment escalated into a desperate kiss. Each fed the link with all the passion and love they could, as if the loving gesture could make the minute last for all time. They broke off, only six seconds left.
Buffy couldn't contain herself, her very soul wanted to tear free, "Oh, God. It's not enough time . . ."
Angel pulled Buffy close again, and said; "Please . . ." followed by, "Bye . . ."
"I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never forget," Buffy murmured into Angel's chest, tears raining from her eyes.
Angel held Buffy as tightly as he could, and clenched his eyes in fear of the moment when the greatest day of his existence would end . . .
The world flashed, and everything went white.
Then Angel opened his eyes.
Buffy was across the room, saying her goodbye. At least, she did twenty-four hours ago. Now, Buffy Summers was right in front of him, clinging tightly to his strong shoulders. Angel blinked, tears still fresh in his eyes. What's going on? Angel held Buffy at arm-length, and looked at her. Her mascara had run, and he could see the subtle lines traced by tears. Her blue eyes were still full of tears, but she was beginning to realize what he was. Buffy's lower lip trembled and looked at her lover, "What happened, Angel?" He backed away from Buffy and searched the room franticly, "I don't know, Buffy . . . let's pay the Oracles another visit, shall we?"
Epilogue
The demon-slaying duo stood just outside the entrance to the Realm of the Oracles, where just earlier that day Doyle had shown Angel how to gain audience with the Oracles. As Angel readied the spell ingredients that would activate the portal, Buffy shivered, and clutched her shoulders to preserve body heat. Angel, while enrapt in his task at hand, had more attention on Buffy, and reached out to squeeze her hand. "These chambers aren't heated. Here," Angel offered Buffy his overcoat. The ingredients were complete, and the room flashed. The portal was open, and Angel looked at Buffy, "You ready?" he asked. Buffy nodded, and they walked into the presence of the Oracles, holding hands tightly . . . unwilling to be separated.
The chamber was sparse, an ancient temple maybe. The walls were as stone, and a grand corridor led away from the portal. Before Buffy and Angel, two gold-skinned beings regarded the lovers with a curious, but all-knowing gaze. "You have come for the answer," the female said, while her male counterpart said no word. Angel nodded, and received a loving squeeze on his hand, "We have. Why weren't the twenty-four hours rewound until before Mohra's blood mixed with mine?" Now, the male oracle spoke, "You were told that since this is a matter of love, we would have no part of it." "You proved that you were no lesser being, and in such, proved that love was of our cause. We have granted you a rare gift; because it is indeed that the forces of darkness are growing. You asked if Mohra spoke the truth, and we told you as much as any could be told. Your love binds you both together, and is your greatest strength. We will not lose a warrior from our cause; thus, we have turned you back into a demon with a soul. But, warrior, there are conditions on this gift, if you accept: one, you will no longer be burdened with the curse you have carried for centuries, and two, you will be as human, but always a vampire. Your soul will remain with you always, never will you and it be separated," the female oracle hesitated. "Can you accept these conditions?" Angel looked at Buffy, who spoke up, "He will possess the same powers and strengths he had as a vampire, but will be in all likeness, human?" The male oracle nodded, "It is so, but as he carries the strengths of a vampire, he also carries the weaknesses therein," he turned to concentrate on Angel. "You will still be unable to walk in the daylight, a stake though your heart will end your being, and you will be victim to all other banes of vampires." The female cocked her head, "Will you accept these conditions?" Angel nodded once, and said, "I will. Thank you." The oracles both inclined their heads, and then were gone. The duo was returned to Angel apartment.
Angel turned to Buffy, who kept a short distance behind him, and smiled, "We can finally be together." Buffy beamed, "We'll make it work, right? We made it though this - you're not cursed anymore - we can make it though anything." Pulling her close, holding her tight, Angel nodded, "We'll be together forever, and we'll fight together."
After years of torture, the once-forbidden love of Buffy Summers and Angel would become possible, and they were now able to have normal lives.well, except for the obvious vampire-ness and demon-slayage.
