Disclaimer: Kelly Clarkson tickles your peach. With her own music, of course. That doesn't belong to me. Right.


Dear Digital Diary,

Ughh. Life sucks. Sam and I are fighting again. Well, I'm mad at Sam. Or she's mad at me I guess. The point is, she's not talking to me, which means I'm not talking to her, which means me and her, excuse me, her and I, are fighting.

Trying to find a song on my iPod that will help me get her out of my head. This always happens. When Sam and I are good, I'm totally fine, but when we're fighting, I can't get her freaking face out of my freaking mind. It's like all I can think about is her smile and her laugh and how her hair smells like strawberries. I've decided to just put it on shuffle. My iPod, I mean. Maybe God will do a better job at choosing than me. I'm sure he has better taste in music.

I don't even remember what we were fighting about.

Hmm. Here's a song I don't recognize. I Want You by Kelly Clarkson? I was debating whether or not to skip it, but the melody is kind of ... infatuating. But more interestingly, the song strangly applies to Sam. Don't believe me?

High temper with the shortest fuse

Such a mess with an attitude

Tell me that doesn't perfectly describe her. Not like I'm trying to offend her or anything. The believe word I'm looking for is 'ironic'. What's weird is, I don't remember downloading this song to my iPod. I literally have no idea where it came from.

Never settle never take to much

Count on me just like I count on you

The similarities are wildly accurate. I mean, I was totally kidding about God choosing a song for me but ... apparently He wasn't.

Kiss me like when I first saw you

Figured I couldn't be without you

I can either confirm or deny as to whether or not that is exactly how I feel right now. By the way, I did leave that out, you know when I was mentioning how I feel when we're fighting. The most reaccuring image is that kiss on the balcony. The stupid part is, I didn't even like her then. Not even a slight attraction. And yet ... it's all I can ever think about lately. Guess I just kinda confirmed; that is how I feel right now.

You know, you don't really know someone until you really get to know them. I understand that seemed like a redundant statement, but go with me here. Sam's the same person she always was, of course. It's not like she puts up a front or anything. But lately ... It's like I'm meeting her for the first time. Like we're just getting truly aquanted. I thought I knew everything there was to know about her and then some. Not anymore.

The way she squints her eyes when she's thinking. The way she itches behind her ear when she's nervous. The way she bites her lip when she's embarrassed. The way her real laugh sounds, and not her breathless one or the one that sounds like a snicker, but her real laugh. The one that erupts and fills up the entire room with joy, like bubbles.

And don't even get me started on her voice. The way she sings ... She tries to hide it from me when I'm around, I know it. When commercial jingles are stuck in her head. When we sing along to the radio and I catch the blissful sound of her voice. She'll try to hide it from me. She'll try to mask it by humming or changing her tone to being really low or much too high. Probably the only thing Sam is actually humble about. It's intregueing, actually. Almost like a challange. It sparks interest in me, finding out new things about her, things that make her someone different than the girl I've known all these years. Man, do I take her for granted. I don't care how badly she might have treated me in the past; I'm the one who's lucky in this relationship. I just ...

I want her. I want everything about her, good, bad or ugly. I want to be with her. Laugh with her. Joke with her. Talk with her. Be with her. Touch her. Kiss her. I want it all and I want her now. I want her more than she'll ever understand, heck, more than I'll ever understand. And I can't be without her. It's like this weird thirst that no liquid can quench. I'm having major withdrawels. It's because of this that I'm going belly up, raising up my white flag.

The silence, the fight, the anger ... It's totally not worth it. And so I'm going to text her. Actually, I just texted her a second ago:

You and me walkin together

Squarin' off for worse or for better

I want you

Well. There it is. Would just like to clarifty that I unknowingly plagerized. I think I was just so wrapped up in the song and the moment that all the emotion just spilled out onto my cellphone keyboard. This is pretty nervewracking, to tell the truth; it's been at least two minutes and she hasn't texted back. I know that seems like a short amount of time, but Sam is a speed texter. Sometimes she replies before I can even click send.

Gasp! Digital Diary! Good news, do I bring you! She texted me back and said- Whoa. I'M HAVING AN EPIPHANY. No, that's now what she said. I just realized something ... Sam knew what I meant when I texted her ... which meant she must have known the song. The song that I didn't know and didn't know why it was in my iPod. Gosh, I can't believe I didn't realize she put the song on there before! She'd been borrowing my iPod a lot recently.

I think God really does have great taste in music.

Oh wait! I didn't even tell you what she said! Well, you already know what I texted her. Then she replied:

No one else will do.

No one makes me smile.

No one gets me how you do.

I want you too.((:

You know? I think me and Sam- Sam and I, are gonna be okay. Yeah. We'll be just fine, for worse or for better. Kudos, Kelly Clarkson, kudos indeed.

Until we meet again, dear friend.

-Freddie

Just a bit of fun, that's all. xD Oh, and just to help you, the reader, get a better understanding of myself, the writer, I'll just say that ever since the day I stumbled upon Jeanette McCurdy's youtube and found out she could sing, I've been infatuated with her voice. Also, I love the idea of Sam having the random hidden talent that Freddie is dying to unvale.

Oh, yeah. Don't you think that's something only Freddie would do? Have a digital diary on his like, 'ParePad' or something?

Anywho. Tell me whatcha think. Toodles.