AN: Back when it looked like Finn would be in two episodes of the revival and Logan only one, I made a prediction. It was a joke. And yet I was only half wrong. After brief consideration, I changed Richard's funeral to Logan's wedding, so it would eliminate a couple other problems and make more sense. I'm such an amateur, thinking plots should "make sense."
As appalling as it is that this was always the desired outcome, regardless of when it ended, there is humor in it. ASP's official sophisticated ending is an exhausted fanfiction trope. But with more contrivances. Rory's pregnant, what will Jess/Logan do? LOL
Disclaimer: Not my characters, and fair warning: when I try to emulate the master manipulator, I get tongue-in-cheek with Rory pretty fast.
Means to an End
Rory ducked her head behind a flower arrangement to shield herself from the passing couple. It was a grand event, the wedding in New York she'd decided to attend. It was good that she was invited to the wedding. It meant there were no hard feelings, it meant everyone had moved on and was happy. Of course Rory was happy, and it made her happy to see her ex-boyfriend happy. She truly did want him to be happy, even if it wasn't with her. After all, she'd had her chance.
"Are you hiding?" an Australian voice asked from behind her.
Startled, Rory stood up straight and whipped around to see Finn, decked out in his tux. Blushing for getting caught, she gestured to the flowers and said, "I was just checking out this floral arrangement. Do you think the bride picked these flowers? Or was it her new mother-in-law?"
"Logan, actually. He was quite outspoken about the floral arrangements. Cala lilies just wouldn't do." Finn glanced over at the passersby. "So you weren't hiding from the Dark Lord and his lady?"
Rory's eyes darted over too. "Of course not. I have no reason to hide from Mitchum and Shira."
"Of course."
"I mean, am I a foreign correspondent like I always said I was going to be? No, not exactly. But I've written some things." She rushed on, "Things for some very prominent online magazines, in fact. I have nothing to be ashamed of."
"I'm sure you don't."
"And I was on the presidential campaign trail, right out of college." Rory muttered, "I thought I would get to continue covering Obama, since he did win and I was already covering him, but that apparently isn't how it works."
"You sound very confident," Finn said. "Shall we go talk shop with Mitchum right now?"
Though he offered his arm, she didn't take it. "No thank you." She pressed her lips together as she looked from Shira to the newlyweds. The bride was a French heiress, no doubt winning the approval of her new in-laws, Rory thought with a twinge of envy. No, not envy, she was Rory Gilmore, she didn't need people to like her. She looked at the head table again.
Logan was as handsome as ever in his tux. If anything, he'd grown more attractive with time. Eyes slightly narrowed, Rory scrutinized his new bride, Odette. She was pretty enough, Rory supposed. She had light brown hair and moved with easy grace around the room. Her dress had delicate lace all over and probably cost a fortune.
"How about a drink then?" Finn asked.
"Now that, I could use," Rory said, taking his arm this time. They walked over to the bar, where she asked for scotch and downed it in one gulp.
Finn watched her and raised a brow. Rory smirked, smugly proud to prove she wasn't some goody-goody. It was always fun to amaze people and remind them Rory Gilmore could do anything. She asked for more scotch and threw it back as well.
"Now it's a party," Finn said, lifting his glass toward her before downing his own tumbler.
With fresh drinks, they went back to people watching on the fringe of the ballroom. Rory didn't really want to go back to her assigned seat. She hadn't even brought a date. She couldn't find one before the RSVP deadline. How humiliating, to go to her ex-boyfriend's wedding alone. Lorelai had offered to tag along, but that seemed more pathetic.
"I can't believe I have to watch another one of my ex-boyfriends get married. First Dean, now Logan. Not that it worked out for Dean."
"That's too bad. What happened?"
Rory lifted a shoulder. "Too young, they wanted different things."
Finn nodded once.
At the end of the cocktail hour, it was time for the toasts. The maid of honor stood up and took the microphone first. "Hey, shouldn't you be up there?" Rory asked Finn, nodding at the empty chair on the other side of Colin.
"I'm sure they assume I'm off, chasing some beautiful girl." Mischievously, he said, "But they're only half right, they don't realize I've got one in my clutches." She eyed him grimly and took another drink as the maid of honor spoke. Finn said, "Logan wasn't going to let me talk in front of a large group of people anyway, so my job is done. No one throws a bachelor party like me and Colin."
"I have no doubt."
Rory looked around at all the guests seated at round tables. It certainly was a large crowd, a few hundred people, at least. She could only assume there were dignitaries and the like amongst them. She had no doubt a large quantity of Logan's extended family sat in the sea of guests, too, though which ones, Rory did not know. Once you've met one Huntzberger, she was sure you'd met them all.
Logan's sister was one of the bridesmaids seated at the head table. Maybe she and her new sister-in-law were buddy-buddy. How nice.
"So what do we know about this Odette?" Rory asked. "Other than that she'll help Mitchum expand the empire and ensure a dynasty." Just like an 18th century king. Of course no one in the Huntzberger family knew it was 2016. It made complete sense that those people would operate like this.
"Cynical, darling," Finn said with a sidelong glance at her. He looked back at his friend. "Their parents introduced them."
"Figures."
"Seven years ago, at one of Mitchum's parties."
That caused Rory to turn a confused frown on Finn. "Seven years?"
"Yes. Their relationship had a number of phases," he said. "First, they met and she did not care for him."
Rory rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "That sounds familiar."
"But he wasn't interested in her, either. Their parents orchestrated so many run-ins that they eventually blew off one event together and found they didn't hate one another's company," Finn explained. "They decided they could tolerate each other as friends, and even schemed to placate their parents by pretending to date. The plan was to have a big blow out at one of Mitchum's parties—in front of everyone. Then they could say they tried." Finn continued, "But they danced all night and before they knew it, the party was over and they forgot about the staged breakup."
Rory narrowed her eyes. "Who forgets to breakup with someone?" she asked rhetorically. "Set an alert on your phone and just do it. It shouldn't be hard when you aren't in a real relationship." She scowled at the head table. Didn't one of them have the guts to do it?
"Well they forgot," Finn said. "Or maybe it was on purpose, because that night was the first time they—"
"I get it," Rory said flatly.
"That cemented things, they weren't pretending anymore, or breaking up. Logan was as surprised as anyone else."
"So they pretended to date and fell in love?" Rory asked dryly. "How very cheesy romance novel of them." She sighed and watched Colin take his turn. He gave a standard best man speech, riddled with inside jokes no one else could be in on. Well, Rory was in on some. She smiled fondly at a couple of the memories she, too, held. She turned back to Finn. "So that was the dating phase?"
"Yes, that was the longest one, five years. Then Odette couldn't figure out why he wasn't proposing," he said. "She dragged Colin and me out for drinks, and interrogated us about why Logan wasn't serious about her. We had to explain why he was trigger shy."
Rory's shoulders dropped an inch. "Oh."
"So she pounded on his door and told him she wasn't that American girl who broke his heart and wouldn't say no if he if asked, so he should ask already."
Rory looked down at her feet and swallowed hard.
"He admitted to her that he was afraid she'd turn him down, and he didn't want to break up," Finn said. "She told him he was being stupid and get down on one knee already."
They were both quiet as they listened to Colin share yet another embarrassing story about something Logan did at boarding school. Mitchum and Shira were both cringing. When Colin finally, thankfully, stopped talking and raised his glass, Rory and Finn clinked glasses before draining them.
She looked at the head table again. Logan and Odette smiled at each other as they sipped their champagne. They looked happy. Rory wanted him to be happy. She sighed and turned her attention back to Finn. "My drink's empty, let's get refills." She took his arm and steered him toward the bar. "You can tell me all about the bachelor party."
"It was glorious. The super ultimate party," he said. "We celebrated the end of an era."
XXX
"I had a one-night stand," Rory said, pacing in front of her mother.
"Well I kind of assumed," Lorelai said, watching her go back and forth.
"Why? It is stamped across my face?" Rory asked, stopping in horror.
"No, but you came home the morning after a wedding in yesterday's clothes, so I put two and two together."
Rory flopped down. "I've never had a one-night stand before."
"Never?" Lorelai asked. "You're 32, and this is the only one you've ever had?"
"Yes. How many have you had?"
"None."
"None?"
"Well, I had you."
"I'm such a slut."
"You're not a slut for sleeping with some guy you didn't know one time."
"It wasn't some guy I didn't know," Rory said. "It was Finn."
"Finn, as in one of Logan's dopey friends?"
"Right."
Lorelai thought about it silently for a moment, then asked, "Was he dressed as a Wookie?"
"A Wookie? As in, Chewbacca?"
"Yes."
"Why would he be dressed like Chewbacca?"
"I don't know, wasn't that their thing, in that stupid group at Yale?"
"Those were gorilla masks, and it wasn't a full costume."
"Oh. I was way off," Lorelai said with a roll of her eyes. "I only ask because if he was dressed up in cosplay you might not have known it was him."
"How would we have done it if he was dressed as a Wookie? Wouldn't he have to take it off?"
"Hey, I am not here to judge," Lorelai said.
Rory shook her head. "It was Logan's wedding reception, and he was happy and moved on and over me and getting married, to someone he even loves, apparently."
"As opposed to someone he only tolerates?"
"Yeah, like an arranged marriage."
"Ooh, honey," Lorelai said with pity. "I don't think those are still a thing."
"These are the Huntzbergers we're talking about," Rory reminded her.
"Sure, but still, it's not like he's a prince in line to be king or something. And even if he was, I thought he abdicated." Lorelai said with a frown. "That did happen, right? Or did I imagine it?"
"He quit," Rory confirmed.
"Okay, so I'm not crazy," Lorelai said. "Was he forced to marry her because she's pregnant?"
"No—or, I don't think so."
Lorelai shook her head. "Sorry then, your arranged marriage theory is a no-go. You're reaching." Gently, she said, "Maybe you're the one who needs to talk to someone."
"What's that supposed to mean? Talk to who?"
"A therapist," Lorelai said.
"Why would I need to talk to a therapist?" Rory asked, offended.
"Because when your ex-boyfriend marries another girl you feel the need to justify it with an arranged marriage, out of all things. Like that could be the only possible explanation. That's not normal." Lorelai rambled on, "At least, not in real life. I guess it still happens in cheesy romance novels, under a questionably contrived premise to force the couple together. But even then they end up falling in love with each other."
"Anyway," Rory went on, rolling her eyes, "Logan got married, and I was hanging out with Finn all night. And we drank. A lot."
"A reliable ingredient in the one-night stand."
"He was telling me about the bachelor party, and how extravagant it was, and he kept saying how this was the end of an era. And he kept drinking, which isn't out of the ordinary, but it was like he was sad," Rory said. "I thought it was because Logan would be off doing married guy things now, too busy to go out with the boys, but Finn admitted that he's getting deported."
"Deported?"
"Yeah, he has to go back to Australia. He never had permanent residency, so the government is making him leave," she said. "So we kept drinking and laughing, I think we may have even done the tango out on the dance floor."
"The tango? You did the tango?"
"Yes."
"Can you tango?"
"Apparently."
"When you were drunk," Lorelai deadpanned. "We should check YouTube later." She said, "So you drank, you tangoed, then what?"
"Then? Then I went back to his hotel, and we—tangoed—horizontally."
Lorelai waved it off. "So you slept with your ex-boyfriend's best friend. It's understandable, you had just seen him get married. That can be an emotional time, to see someone you used to love be in love with someone else. It could even cause one to make up strange scenarios as a coping-mechanism."
Rory exhaled heavily. "I guess."
"It'll be fine. It was just one night. Now you'll go on like it never happened, and Finn will be in another hemisphere," Lorelai said. "Don't worry about it."
XXX
It was four weeks later when Lorelai sat down next to her daughter in the center of town, at the gazebo. They looked out at their little town, in all its charmingly quaint glory. It was such a peaceful fall day, Lorelai's mind was completely clear, until Rory broke the silence.
"Mom?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm pregnant."
Fin(n)
