Hollyleaf…

Hollyleaf…

I realized after Hollyleaf died she spoke the truth.

I remembered the rage that I felt within her body. The rage was so intense I had a vision of her fur rising and back arching in hate of the cats that she trusted with her life. That we trusted with our lives. Deeper within, I could feel something more unsettling, and something that she herself had tried to deny.

Betrayal.

And agony.

Our parents were not who they were supposed to be. Squirlflight and Brambleclaw of ThunderClan were not our mother and father.

Rather, Leafpool, the medicine cat of ThunderClan, and Crowfeather, a WindClan warrior, were our parents.

Both of them had broken the Warrior Code, even though they knew they shouldn't have been together.

We were the result.

We, who should have never been born.

I remembered telling my father, "The truth is out now. None of us can hide from it again."

None of us, especially Lionblaze and I, would suspect that it would be Hollyleaf that told the truth at the Gathering.

She, who worshiped the Warrior Code more than any cat I knew.

She, who hated the very existence of Squirlflight and Leafpool.

She, who had murdered Ashfur in the first place to protect us from the truth.

Lionblaze said that to Hollyleaf, the information was different to her. Our birth had shattered her precious Warrior Code into pieces.

I still don't understand.

I understand now that I see the world in different eyes.

I was accepting of the truth before. I even understood partly why Leafpool and Squirlflight had done what they had done.

Unlike Hollyleaf.

Unlike Lionblaze, our brother.

I knew somehow we were different. Why else would we be the Three?

But then my black and white vision started to change to gray.

After my sister died.

I was hostile towards Squirlflight and Leafpool after that. I hated their very existence.

Like Hollyleaf.

Lionblaze was the same.

Even after we found out that Dovwing was the Third, I still despised breathing the same air as them.

Squirlflight had lost her mate.

Leafpool had to resign her position and became a warrior.

We believed they deserved it.

"I'm sick of you flapping your wings like an injured sparrow, feeling oh so sorry for yourself. You're not the only cat suffering. Your pain isn't the hardest to bear."

I snorted. We had been betrayed. Lied to. Our sister had perished because of it. How was this not the hardest pain to bear?

When we didn't find Hollyleaf's body, I started to wonder.

Is Hollyleaf alive?

I started to lessen of my feelings towards the two cats that had betrayed me.

Until I remembered.

Hollyleaf fleeing into the tunnels, and never coming out.

Because of them, Hollyleaf had died. Just because we didn't find a body didn't erase the fact that Hollyleaf was dead.

I sighed and thought.

Thinking of my sister.

Hollyleaf…