Parings: Implied Bryan/Lei

A/N: I was bored as hell and this suddenly popped out of nowhere. I've been waiting for the other role players at Tekken Yaoi RP on LJ since last night. Me ish loneleh. (Me is lonely.) T__T

Summary: It's over. Everything's gone now. Lei wants to let go that those happy days are nothing but lost memories.

Warnings: Lei angst ahead.

Disclaimer: Still don't own Tekken.


Something once lost can never return.

Lei Wulong wallowed in misery at the truth of those words. It's been days since he stepped out of his apartment. The police department had called him several times, telling him to report back on the job. Even Jin and Steve phoned him non-stop ever since he stopped showing up in their daily get-togethers.

He felt pathetic. He did nothing but huddle in a corner of his room and drank his ass off while crying his eyes out. He hadn't slept in days, paranoid that nightmares will plague him again, but he also never felt safe being wide awake. Who knew dreams could be so vivid, you wont be able to distinguish it from consciousness?

"I'm sorry."

Tears ran down Lei's face as he whispered those words. The horrid scene kept on replaying in his head. The sound of gunshots, the smell of blood... and most importantly Bryan's agonized screams. It was all too much.

He grabbed the can of beer beside him and drank the all the contents in one go. The alcohol burned down his throat. Not that he cared. Lei forgot how many cans he had already.

Memories of his rookie days flooded his mindscape. He remembered the first time he received his badge. He also remembered his first day on the job with his new partner.

"Bryan."

Bryan and Lei were one heck of a team. They made a name for themselves during the early years of their career together. To Lei he was more than a mere colleague, he was his best friend and later, his lover. Solving crimes, capturing criminals, moving up in the ranks... those were the days. They often go to dates on the local park when they could have days off then spend all their nights in each other's arms.

Lei thought that would go on forever. But on the fateful night of that shoot out, his world came crashing down. Little by little a part of him died. The man he loved was gone, or so he thought. After knowing Bryan was miraculously brought back to life, he couldn't stop from jumping into conclusions. Lei assumed Bryan would forgive him. He was dead wrong..

"Oh god, Bryan."

The Chinese man shut his eyes as he felt an overwhelming sense of melancholy enveloped him. More tears flowed down his flushed, porcelain skinned face. The man who used to be his only source of love and comfort became his most hated enemy.

"It's all my fault."

That's right , Wulong. It's all your damn fault.

Lei jerked his eyes open. He was just hallucinating Bryan's cruel words. His fucked up mind was playing tricks on him again.

Tch. You're pathetic as always, you know that?

The voice wouldn't leave him alone. Pulling his knees to his chest, he hugged himself.

You abandoned me when I needed you the most!

The policeman shut his eyes once more.

You betrayed me!

He tried his best to ignore it.

You could have ordered the others to ceasefire but you chose to let me die instead!

He wanted to stop this madness.

Why, Lei? Why?!

"SHUT UP!" Lei snapped. Shaking uncontrollably, he clutched his head in fear of losing his remaining sanity. He abruptly stood up and ran to his bed. He couldn't take it anymore. It was all suffocating him. The guilt, the pain, everything. Crashing on the mattress, he held his pillow close. Muffled sobs filled the room as he did so.

"If I just shot myself that night, I could have died with you. We would have been together..." He curled himself up, the warmth of the bed did nothing to comfort him. "I was a coward. I was too afraid to die. You were my everything so please believe me."

Slowly letting the pillow go, he reached for something under the covers. Ah, there it is. Bringing the gun closer, he shed his final tears. "But maybe you could forgive me now." A sad smile formed on his lips. He cocked the pistol on his head, every trace of emotion left his face at that moment.

"I love you Bryan."


A/N: Okaaay... After re-reading what I've written I realize how angsty this really is. I hope you like it though.

Higanbana - Red Spider Lily

~ In Japanese flower language it means: Never to meet again/Lost memory/Abandonment