„Waaaaahhh!"
Heavy eyelids opened slowly and revealed sleepy emerald coloured eyes. The owner of the eyes hesitantly sat up in his bed and heaved a pained sigh. While rubbing the crust from his eyes he tried to arrive in the world of the woken and looked around his darkened room bemused. Just when his droopy eyes had finally adjusted to the dark atmosphere the man was blinded by the bright red light of his alarm clock. Squinting his emerald eyes together he tried to read the time on it. With much effort he could eventually make out that it was in fact 2:36 in the morning. Confused of why he had woken up at such a godforsaken hour he rubbed the back of his head and did his best to sort out his thought.
"WAAAAAAAAAH!"
The man was thrown out of his thoughts by a hysteric wail. His head quickly shot up, making his sleepy brain hammer against his skull, and looked at the half opened door. The cries were coming from the room right opposite his one and didn't seem to stop soon. With a blank stare he kept looking right ahead when reality came crushing down in him. These pained cries came from - !
"Xion!" Like a madman he jumped out of his bed, not caring that he knocked over his alarm clock and lamp on his bedside table while doing so, and sprinted in the other room. Switching the light on the man ran over to the cot and sent the one crying a worried look. With as much caution as possible he shoved his hands under the baby's head and back and took her into his arms. "Shh, Shh, everything's alright." the man said in a quiet and soothing voice while slightly rocking the small girl. Soon the wailing calmed down and just some hiccups could be heard now and then. The man sighed, feeling relieve wash over him. After some time the little baby happily began playing with its spit, making bubbles along the way. The adult made a playful grimace as he put the kid down in the cot again.
"Eww Xion, that's disgusting, bleh." the elder one joked and stuck his tongue out. A heartwarming laugh filled the otherwise silent room, plastering a content smile on the man's face. He gave a light laugh and caressed the small one's head. He got a bright laugh in return, which made him smile even wider. "What am I gonna do with you? You'll never ever fall asleep again like this." he whispered while tickling the baby's tummy, earning a series of giggles. His emerald eyes unconsciously drove over to a small old CD player with a few CD's and a picture next to it. The man's hand stopped tickling the kid and his smile dropped instantly when his eyes landed on the picture.
Biting his lower lip he was about to make his way over to the music device when a sound of protest stopped him in his tracks. Xion had grabbed his index finger and grumbled angrily. Snickering lightly he patted her on the head. "It's okay, I'm not going anywhere." As if understanding what he had just said, the kid shut up and let go of him, refusing to put her arms down however. After giving a small and slightly forced smile the adult went over to the CD player. He took the CD from the top of the stack in his hands and looked at the cover. A well drawn picture of a black haired woman was seen with a golden writing that said "Lullaby" adorning the bottom. The adult tensed and he gritted his teeth. Letting a heavy sigh leave his mouth he put the CD in the player and pressed the play button. After the device read the CD for a while a calming melody started to play.
The man walked over to the child and noticed how fast it had gotten drowsy again; even its arms weren't outstretched anymore but rather clutched around the small yellow dog plush. A smile found its way onto the man's face again but was instantly wiped off when the vocals of the song started. A beautiful female voice filled room, her voice sounding tender and oh so loving. The baby had found its way back to the world of sleep and made gentle and joyful sounds. The adult, however, tensed intensely. When he saw the kid sleeping soundly he walked over to the CD player and turned the volume down, so that it could only be heard in the child's room.
The man practically fled out of the room and closed the door behind him. Doing so with his own room's one too, he let himself fall on his bed. He violently pressed the palms of his hands onto his eyes, preventing anything from possibly coming out of them. Biting his lower lip again he tried evening his breath and calming his racing heart. The man winced when he felt a sharp pain and blood tickle his taste buds. "Great," he thought "I bit it open again."
Growling he turned to his side and pitched the bridge of his nose. "Get a grip Axel!" the man, Axel, screamed in his head. "It's already been three months! Don't be a pussy and cry about shit like that! It wasn't anything different than every other time!" Axel scolded himself in his mind.
That's right, what he had had with her wasn't different than all the other relationships he had had before. It had been always the same. He would have found someone he liked and eventually gotten together with her. The relationship would have ended after he had had enough of her, whether it had been her personality or the sex. But mostly it had been the sex. Axel had just gotten bored too easily with all the plain chicks he had been with. And she hadn't meant anything more to him than the other girls he had hooked up with.
The adult's lips escaped a short pained laugh. "Yeah right, nothing more…" he whispered with quivering lips. Who was he kidding? She had beenso much more. She had made him feel alive for the first time. Back when he had first met her he had tried to get her into bed, obviously. She, however, had shown him the cold shoulder but not with sending him a small smile first. That had gotten him interested. Had he known that she would change so much in his life, he would have avoided her at all cost. She had shown him the bright side of life, she had shown him what a real relationship was like, she had shown him what LOVE was. He had gotten so much happiness from her only for it to be utterly shattered by her.
After a long time of waiting they had finally decided to make the big step of love making. That had been Axel's real first time. For the first time ever he had performed the act of love with the one he had actually loved. Everything had seemed so right. But when she had found out that she had been impregnated by their first time, she had been furious. She had blamed Axel for everything. She had complained that she was too young to raise a child and even threatened the man with abortion.
Axel had been heartbroken. The one that had had caused his life to make a 180 had told him that she would kill their child. The man had begged her to think it over but she had made up her mind. She didn't want the child. Axel had eventually convinced her not to kill the child but to give birth to it instead. This, however, had made the man live the worst 9 months of his life. She had had a condition. Axel would have to look after her the whole 9 months until the birth and fulfil every wish she had had. That wouldn't have been a problem for the man if there hadn't been the fact that now it had been her who had done the 180. She had looked at him with all the hate that a human could possibly feel for someone and she had made him do humiliating things just for the heck of it, and since they had had an agreement he had had to do them.
Three months prior to the current day his daughter, Xion, had finally been born. Right after her birth she had been thrust into Axel's arms and her mother had been gone ever since.
A trembling breath left the man's mouth as he wiped the lucky tears that had managed to escape away. Xion's mother had been someone very important in Axel's life, that was for sure, but now she was gone. It was his job now to raise Xion, after all it's what he had wanted. But, of course, life couldn't be fair. It was only ironic how Xion could only fall asleep to her mother's singing when she was high-strung. The first time, Axel had put in her CD by accident but for Xion it had been the perfect sleeping potion. For him, however, it was pure torture every time he heard that voice.
Xion was all Axel had. Everything he loved. She was his joy….
But why did the joy have to bring him so much pain?
One year later
Big blue eyes, clear as crystals, stared at the outstretched hands in front of them. The girl who owned the crystal blue eyes glanced at her father who had an encouraging but also kind of mocking grin plastered on his face. He was crouched in front of the dining table, barely a meter away from the girl. "C'mon Xion" he laughed, "I told ya, if you won't talk, you'll walk!" The adult let out another laugh when the little kid frowned and blew away a stray strand of her short raven black hair. The poor girl was gripping the leg of their dining table for dear life, not even being able to stand straight but rather being in a half crouching pose. Her knees were shaking uncontrollably too which wasn't helping the situation at all.
When her father gestured once again for her to come his way, she grumbled disapprovingly. She might have just turned one year old three months ago but Xion was a smart kid. She understood many things her father said, or at least the ones he said to her, but every time she formed the words right in her head her mouth just wouldn't cooperate, so she gave up. Unfortunately, her oh so nice father just couldn't leave her alone. When the adult had noticed that her talking wasn't improving he had just decided that it was time for her to learn how to walk. Xion didn't like this at all. She had needed months to just stand on her two legs without falling on her butt, or even worse, on her face and that only had proven to be successful when she was gripping an object as hard as she could. Actually, it was more like her arms did the standing rather than her feet. And for the last week her father wouldn't leave her side and stop nagging her about walking at all.
"Xiooooon, I'm waiting~" the man chirped in a sing sang voice. Okay, the girl was officially annoyed. Gathering all her courage (and the rage that was burning inside of her) the black haired kid made the first step….which was followed by sloppy stumbling movements. But eventually she made it into the warmth of her father's arms, who was beaming with pride.
Axel hugged the girl in his arms and laughed. "There you go, my little girl!" he praised and planted a kiss on her forehead. "It ain't that hard, now is it?" The man laughed again when the girl showed him a disapproving pout. He hugged his child against his chest and stroked her head, his trademark sign of affection for her. But what came next wasn't something he could have seen coming.
"Ba….P…Ba..Ba." came the little voice of his daughter which was a bit muffled by his shirt. Despite of that he was sure that he hadn't misheard her. "Xi….on?" he asked with a trembling voice. The child backed away a bit to look straight at Axel's face and with a big proud smile she answered. "Ye…Yesh, Baba?"
Axel froze. Of all the first words that could have left her mouth, her first word was "Baba". Meaning Papa. Daddy. FATHER. Axel loved being her father and, of course, there wasn't anything in the world that mattered more than Xion to him but now that she had finally called him what he was to her, he realized that even if he gave her all his love, she could never have a normal childhood. Axel was, after all, a man. He could never replace the love and warmth a mother could give, he could never have the conversations a mother would have with her daughter.
The man hugged his daughter tight to his body so that she couldn't see the forming tears in his eyes. "I'm sorry sweet cheeks, but don't call me that, please" It actually broke his heart to say such words to his treasure but he couldn't take the pain when he thought of all the things a father couldn't do for his child, his girl, alone.
Xion squirmed in his crushing grip but seemed to fail to break free. "Babaaa, le- g…ou" she tried her best to speak but again her mouth didn't do what her head was telling it. Unluckily, her attempt just made the adult hug her even closer. "mhhhhm…" she protested and finally managed to slip out of his grip. Axel was a bit taken aback by the quick movements of the child and gasped lightly. Xion clapped her hands, harder than intended, on her father's cheeks on send him a mad pout. But of course her legs had to give out right that moment. Thankfully, the man managed to catch her and set her down in his lap.
The girl slapped her hands on her father's cheeks again, this time earning a grumbling noise from him. "Baba!" she cried, actually being proud of herself since it was the only word she could say without problem all of a sudden. Her cry had caught the man's attention. "Baba, don' cwy! Ev…ely thin' wi…ll be awligh'! (Don't cry! Everything will be alright!)"
Axel's eyes widened at his daughter. She had just seriously used his main sentence that he used to calm her down on him. When he looked at the determined face of the girl which was entirely destroyed by the cute pout her lips had formed he couldn't do anything but to chuckle. He couldn't believe he was just told off by his baby daughter. With a smile he laid his head on Xion's shoulder and sighed. He really had to finally man up.
"Baba?" he heard her say.
"Mhm?"
"Y- You heawyyy!"
