Because these boys totally would, the dweebs.
Kurt looked up from his pint of ice cream when the door to the loft rattled open, smiling when his fiance was on the other side. "Hey, B! You're just in time for a marathon of Dance Moms with me!" he said, waving his spoon in greeting.
"Oh, awesome!" Blaine chirped, carefully setting his messenger bag on the ground before walking over to Kurt. He plopped down and snuggled into Kurt's side, opening his mouth to accept the spoonful of cookie dough goodness Kurt offered him. "Mind if I show you the surprise I have for you first?"
"Ooooh, a surprise? Do tell," Kurt said, straightening up as his interest piqued.
"Well, you know how you and Rachel wanted to rebel a little since you were finally in New York?" Blaine started. Kurt nodded, spurring Blaine on. "I kind of decided that we may as well make that an official rite of passage for anyone who wants to live in the loft and stopped by that tattoo parlor on my way home today. Louis the tattoo guy says hi, by the way!"
"Wait, what?" Kurt asked, spoon freezing midway to his mouth. "You got a tattoo?"
"Yes?" Blaine uptalked. One of his eyebrows quirked in confusion. "Do you disapprove or something? Because you've really got no room to talk, Kurt."
"No, no, of course I don't disapprove, B," Kurt said, waving his free hand dismissively while dropping his spoon back in the ice cream carton. "I just never expected you to want one. You're so wholesome." He smirked kindly at that.
"Okay, one, I am not wholesome," Blaine said, looking hurt. "And two, even if I was, do I look any less wholesome now?" he asked, spreading his arms wide and inviting Kurt to stare at him. Kurt didn't need prompting for that, and Blaine admittedly looked just the same as always in a light lavender bow tie and sky blue check cardigan.
"Blaine, honey, you said 'gee whiz' unironically last week," Kurt said. "You're about as wholesome as they come. But no, you don't look any less cute and compact than usual."
"I'm going to throw your hairspray out the window," Blaine said with a pout. Kurt leaned in and kissed it away, unable to resist Blaine's big hazel eyes.
"Never doubt that I would put Nair in your hair gel if you ever tried that, B," Kurt said, smirking. "But I really do wanna see what tattoo you got!"
Blaine pulled away and stood up, leading Kurt to a pout of his own at the loss of Blaine's warmth. Blaine bent down and smooched Kurt on the forehead before removing his sweater and shirt. "Well? What do you think?" he asked, puffing his chest out slightly.
Kurt was speechless. Tattooed right over Blaine's heart was a blackbird in flight, wings outstretched majestically. It was so lively that Kurt half-expected it to fly right off Blaine's chest and into their living room.
"Blaine," Kurt breathed, incapable of more speech.
"I hoped you'd like it," Blaine smiled, coming to sit next to Kurt again. Kurt immediately brought his fingers to Blaine's chest, touching gently over the tattoo.
"You got a blackbird," Kurt said, smiling beatifically.
"Did you expect anything less?" Blaine asked.
"I was envisioning one of the lines from Peacock right over your ass or something, honestly," Kurt joked, laughing when Blaine smacked lightly at his arm.
"This is on my body forever, baby, I wanted something a little more meaningful than that," Blaine said with a smile. Kurt's face froze.
"God, this is on your body forever," Kurt repeated. "That's a lot of pressure to not screw this up."
"Kurt, baby, we're kind of getting married," Blaine said. "I'm pretty sure that means I'm safe to get a tattoo inspired by you. Plus, it's not like it's your name or something."
"I'd be walking you back to the parlor to get that lasered off right now if that was my name," Kurt said, incensed. "Do you know how tacky that is, Blaine Anderson?"
"Why do you think I went with the bird?" Blaine said. "I'm trying to be romantic, not idiotic."
"Well, it worked," Kurt said, pecking Blaine on the lips. "In fact, I think I have an idea of my own now..."
The next day, Kurt strutted into the loft like it was his own personal catwalk.
"Blaine? I have a surprise for you!" he called out, kicking his boots off at the door.
"Oh my God, please save your weird sex things for when I'm out of the house!" Santana yelled back from her bedroom.
"Ignore her, she's just moping because Dani had to go out of town for a week," Blaine said as he appeared from their bedroom. "Whatcha got, baby?"
"I think you're going to want to be back in our room when I show you this," Kurt smirked, and Blaine's eyes went wide.
"Whoa, it's not actually a sex surprise, is it?" he asked, tangling his hand in Kurt's before walking back to their room.
"No, but I figure Santana's not going to be pleased if she sees us 'getting all sappy' in the living room," Kurt air-quoted. "So," he began, pushing Blaine to take a seat on their bed. "After seeing your little surprise for me yesterday, I got inspired for one of my own." He started unbuttoning his shirt, relishing how Blaine's eyes were fixed on his fingers. "And since you got one of my solos, it's only fair that I get one of yours, no?" Kurt dropped his shirt to the ground and waited. He wasn't disappointed.
"Baby...you got-" Blaine choked up, staring at the black outlined puzzle piece directly over Kurt's heart. Kurt had decided to spring for a little red heart in one of the corners too, for a little bonus.
"Blackbird may have been the moment for you, but I knew from Teenage Dream that I'd been looking for you forever," Kurt said, snapping Blaine's attention from his chest to his face. "And hell, if Bette Midler deserves a place on my body, you certainly do too."
"You're damn right I do," Blaine said, surging upright to kiss Kurt hard on the mouth.
God bless Blaine's tattoo kink was Kurt's last coherent thought for a while.
