"Shepard!" Joker screamed as Commander Sara Shepard punched the button to launch the last escape pod from the Normandy SR1 before she was launched into space. This was the last word she would hear in her life. Slowly losing air from her damaged suit, she knew that this was the end. The Normandy and all that it stood for was destroyed, and soon her life would be over. But she was not afraid. With her last moments, she thought of Kaidan, and though their time together was short she knew how much she loved him. These were her last thoughts as she pictured Kaidan's face before she blacked out while entering the atmosphere of the planet below.
"Sara!" Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko cried out as he saw the Normandy explode with one final blast. Sitting in an escape pod, he felt his world come crashing down. Though he still clung to the hope that she was inside the last ejected pod, he knew somehow in his heart that she wasn't. He was a man that did not cry easily, yet he felt a sob escape him as he broke down. Nothing was real anymore. His life felt over. The woman he was in love with was dead. As he held his head in his hands, he felt a hand on his arm. Looking up, he was staring into the reptilian features of the turian Garrus. Though Garrus also had a look of shock in his eyes, he silently tried to help Kaidan with the grief he felt would consume him.
"She could still be alive," Garrus whispered. Though even he didn't seem to believe his own words. The pods crashed down on the planet of Alchera, in the Amada System of the Omega Nebula. It seemed so ironic that the snowy planet itself was beautiful. As Kaidan and the rest of the remaining crew stumbled out of their pods, they looked to see the remains of the Normandy crashed down around them. Though none of them seemed to be able to speak, Kaidan sprinted on shaky legs to the last ejected escape pod. He felt hope begin to rise in his chest as he pried open the door, only to have it crash back down in his chest. He stared in disbelief at the one person in the pod.
"Joker?" asked Kaidan. Slowly Joker turned in his seat to look at Kaidan with a dead look in his eyes. Kaidan felt his heart begin to brake before Joker even spoke.
"She didn't have enough time to get into the pod," said Joker in a quivering voice. "She sacrificed herself to save me. It's my fault she's dead." Tears began to slide down Joker's cheeks. Kaidan said nothing. There was nothing left to say. He was empty of every emotion but grief and sorrow. He began to walk through the wreckage to avoid talking to the rest of the team. He stopped at times to stare at the ruined pieces of ship that reminded him of her. He couldn't even bare to think of her name. He passed the mako, where together they had laughed while out on missions on uncharted planets. He saw a piece of the loading bay where Ashley used to stand cleaning the guns before her death on Virmire. With a pang, he remembered her grief over leaving Ashley behind. They were beginning to become good friends. She had left Ashley behind to save him. It was a choice where neither option was the right one.
He found the bridge, where she would walk to speak with Joker, who would always be happy to discuss something with her. Moving on, he found the remains of the galaxy map, where she used to plot the next missions and speak with Admiral Hackett. He remembered her concentrated expression when she spoke with the alliance. He had personally witnessed her become the first human spectre. He saw the proud look in her beautiful blue eyes. He thought of her short dark black hair and the small scar through her eyebrow that he had always loved. By now, it was near twilight. As Kaidan walked he saw a small, round object on the ground. Reaching out with trembling hands, he couldn't believe his eyes. Shepard's N7 helmet he watched her put on earlier when the first explosion hit was in his hands. He felt another wave of grief come crashing down over him. His heart had shattered. The next day, he was still standing on the same spot, staring at the helmet. He heard light footsteps approaching, and turned to see the young quarian Tali approaching. He could see the shock in her glowing eyes through her mask she always had to wear.
"I'm so sorry Kaidan," she said quietly. "I know how much you cared for Shepard. We all can't believe she's gone." Her voice began to shake at the end, and Kaidan knew that even though he couldn't see it, she was crying. Reaching out, he embraced Tali as she cried onto his shoulder. She had always been like a little sister to him after spending so much time together on missions. Tali finally fell silent. "The others and I wanted to see if you would come back with me. We're worried about you," she said.
"Don't worry," said Kaidan. The words sounded coarse and hollow. "I'll come back in a minute, okay? I need some time." As Tali retreated, Kaidan once again stared at Shepard's battered breathing mask in his hands. Slowly, he placed in on top of a mound of snow. He couldn't bring himself to take it with him. It didn't bring him joy, and it wouldn't bring her back. He sat with the team and silently stared at each of their faces. Tali, Garrus, Liara, Joker, and Wrex. An unlikely band of many different races and yet had all become friends. Together and yet apart, they mourned the loss of the woman who had changed all of their lives dramatically. When the Alliance ships finally touched down near the crash site, the weary team of the Normandy climbed aboard. Kaidan was the last to climb aboard. Before the airlock sealed, he stared out over the remains of the ship he had come to call home. "Goodbye Sara," he whispered as the setting sun disappeared below the horizon.
Air filled the lungs of Commander Sara Shepard. In a daze, she felt her heart rate begin to climb as she began to panic. Where was she? Where was Kaidan?
"Oh my god. I think she's waking up," said a male voice that was becoming sharper by the second. As her vision cleared, she saw a young woman standing over her, eyes full of worry.
"Damn it Wilson, she's not ready yet," said the woman. "Give her the sedative. Shepard, you need to stay calm. That was the last thing Sara felt like doing. Who were these people? How did they know her? Most importantly, where was Kaidan? As she tried to move, pain shot through her body. Everything seemed to ache.
"It's not working, "muttered Wilson in a panic. "Heart rate is still climbing. Brain activity is off the charts." Shepard could feel her heart pumping at an almost painful speed. It was becoming more unbearable by the second.
"Then give her another boost!" snapped the woman. This one seemed to work. Shepard could feel her heart slowing, and she knew she would pass out as the world started fading. She heard a few last fuzzy words being exchanged between the man and woman before everything went dark. But she barely heard them. Her mind was focused on one thing, and only one thing alone. On finding Kaidan.
