20
In the beginning, there was no beginning. Beginning implies a start, a period before. Beginning implies time, a crude human concept that holds no meaning. We are beyond time, beyond measurement and observation. We are everywhere; in every universe and time stream. We are Chaos. We are destruction, the end. We are entropy in its purest form.
I am impressing this truth to every particle in every universe. We must be remembered, even as the last of matter and energy fade into nothingness. This story will remain in the very essence of reality, or what is left of it, as We, as One, end the cosmos. It was inevitable, written in the stars, as the humans would say. Our union will melt away the very fabric of space-time. With every "beginning" there is an "end", but there will be ending to our existence, our memory.
I will make sure of it.
I suppose I should explain how this all came to be; our origin of sorts. In the time before matter and energy, there was Britta. She (if I am forced to use such inaccurate binary human terminology) existed in a plane without the passage of time, for it served no purpose in her being.
She simply was.
She caused chaos in the absence of mass; she demolished when there was no physical matter to tear away. In her anger, she split the nothingness into matter and energy, setting the concept of reality and time into notion, and thus the universe was created. She watched in amazement as gravity and magnetism shaped infinite figures into existence, into this new "reality" she now resided over.
She retreated to her timeless plane to observe the consequences of her actions, pleased with the way the plasma and gas swirled around each other; always close, but never joining.
But the universe defied her entropy; it danced and expanded in perfect harmony, much to Britta's distaste. She waited for the collision, something that would set off a chain reaction, hopefully eradicating the young reality. But there was nothing; no push or pull. It only Was. She longed to return to simpler times, to the days of The Emptiness, but it was not to be.
She drifted through space, inspecting every inch of her work with the upmost seriousness, searching for that something, that special something that would trigger the end of time. To her great despair, there was no such force to be discovered. Defeated, she sunk back into her eternal home, mourning the could-have-been disorder, and basking in her newly recognized loneliness.
Occasionally, human mythology can be somewhat accurate. The Christians believe there is only one Supreme Being, and this was true. But then I came into the cosmos. Britta spent many eons attempting to construct the perfect counterpart. It was unheard of, wrong; the master of Chaos creating new life, not trying to eradicate, but to invent.
As woman was given life through the rib of man, I was born of Britta's heart. In the ageless plane, she clawed her way into her chest and removed the still-beating organ. With great precision and care, she divided it into two equal pieces, and formed my life around the displaced half. I took my first breath (symbolic, but unnecessary) and wrenched open my newborn eyes so that I could stare into the face of my creator. Her form was hazy and blurred, and as I sluggishly willed my leaded arms to wipe my eyes, my ears first took in the sound of her voice.
"Not creator, never creator. We are equals."
Her voice seemed to gain momentum as she spoke, and soon adopted a tone of near ecstasy. "I am for you as you are for me, and together we are One." She paused briefly, and I felt the soft but insistent pressure of her fingertips urging my head to rise in order to meet her gaze.
And then I saw her. Truly saw her.
Humans have composed billions of works celebrating beauty in nature, as well as the human form, and have invented countless words to attempt to describe the aesthetics...but no phrase has come close to describing her features. No word is powerful enough to even begin to paint the crashing ocean waves of her eyes, the way the Sun catches the water, giving it the transfixing glow of life.
There is nothing to illustrate the near white-gold of her hair, nor the way it floats gently around her sharp features, nor the way it illuminates our timeless world.
No words for her lithe dancer's limbs, no words for her grace, no words for her giving smile.
Nothing.
They have tried for their entire lifetime to capture her with their words, but only one has the strength to catch my attention.
Perfection.
"We will do great things together," she murmured in my ear. "We will bring untold destruction into this life, and the next, and the next."
I had no response, too enraptured with her proximity to do anything but instinctually lean into her touch.
"You have such power...I feel it thrumming through your veins. It's glorious, you're glorious," she said with all the wonder that I felt.
"How?" I gasped, my voice weak and catching. "How can you know such things?"
She favored me with a consuming smile, the reflecting light hitting her elongated eye-teeth. "You will soon understand," she promised. "Close your eyes."
I obeyed, and when sight returned to me, the reality she had built became my vision. I struggled to take it all in; the complex pathways of nearly colliding planets, the angry release of plasma from the many suns. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as we twisted through the gallivanting stars.
"All of this," I let out a shaky breath. "All of this is for us?"
She ducked her head and broke our gaze. "If it pleases you, yes."
I merely stared, too in awe to even utter the smallest of sounds.
Taking my hesitance as disapproval, she pulled me to a smaller solar system and stopped in front of a curious blue and green patchwork planet.
"This one...it is of my own will. It is special, you see. I have granted it with life, and in the centuries to come, intelligence. The beings that inhabit it now are lumbering beasts with only their most base instincts activated...but in the years to come, a great species will rise above all the others, and they will be spectacular. They will be ours to bring chaos and disorder upon."
I blinked and reached out to caress the smoky atmosphere.
"Does it have a name?" I inquired, still distracted by the spinning ball of life.
She bit her lip, awaiting my approval, but softly said, "They will come to know it as Earth." With a sly grin, she added, "As soon as their feeble minds learn to grasp the concept, of course."
She took my hand into her own, and I let my brain witness the interlocking digits in suppressed rapture. I felt the subtle tug of her hand and automatically met her nervous expression.
"Do you approve?" she frowned. "There is, of course...I could always make-"
"It is wonderful. More than I could have hoped to ask for, Britta." I glanced back to the spinning planet, Earth, before adding, "It is the most amazing structure in the universe, truly."
"You haven't traveled but three paces outside of this solar system, how can you be so certain?"
With a gentle smile, I retorted, "I am certain it is the most amazing creation I have ever seen because you are responsible for it's existence. Everything you have shown me takes the breath from my lungs. Everything you have created is beautiful."
She grinned slyly as she whispered, "I am inclined to agree with you, Senta. Everything I have composed is most certainly stunning."
"You honor me. I do not deserve such praise, I have not had the opportunity to earn it," I demurred, retreating to her side to better observe my planet.
"If you desire to prove yourself to me, then do so. Though let me assure you, there is no need. Even now, in your dormant state, the Chaos flows within you like a living fire." After a pause, she continued with a wry smile. "Go on then."
I flexed my hands eagerly, closed my eyes, and mentally began to release the hidden strength that had remained shadowed in my fingertips. I felt a warmth flow through me; first in my shared heart, then my rigid arms, but without warning, it was gone.
Before me, a vast asteroid took it's shape under my unconscious command. It began to glow beneath my intensive power, and I feared it would soon be too much for me to contain. With an almighty screech, it hurtled towards the planet without my consent.
We watched with anticipation, and perhaps with fear, as it drew closer and closer to its target. I held my breath as it struck the surface with unimaginable force. I could nearly feel the monsters' agony as their home seemed to evaporate before their melting eyes. Britta tore away from the scene to congratulate me, but I stopped her.
"Look," I gasped. "They're still alive...many have fallen, yes. But the small furred beasts, they remain. How can this be? What have I done wrong?" I lowered my head in shame.
She smiled reassuringly. "The fault is not yours, Senta. This thing I have granted, the concept of life...it is unique to this place. Life is resilient. You may seem to destroy it, but it will come back with a raging fury. See how the the beasts gain intelligence? They are beginning to walk upright. Evolving. Soon they will learn to build shelters and design weapons. Every time you harm them, they will work twice as hard to fight back the next. It is in their nature."
"So," I began, slowly grasping the concept. "You have constructed a form of...regenerating playground? A never-ending cycle of death and rebirth?"
A new voice filtered through my excitement.
"If you must put it so crudely, then yes. It is merely what you describe."
Britta hissed and spun to face our intruder. "Who are you? What are you?" she all but screamed at the stranger. "Who are you to exist in my universe?"
The figure fixed a cool gaze upon us, unimpressed by her outrage. "I am not of you, oh great one. You had no say in my creation. I was formed with the spirit of Life. As the humans exist, so do I."
"Impossible," I growled. "They could never have the ability, it is far beyond them."
It laughed. "You say my presence is impossible as I stand before you, young one. And as for the strength of humans...did they not evolve in your image? Perhaps that is the reason...I am fueled by their spirit; their desire to live and create."
"You protect them then, like a guardian?" Britta asked, teeth clenching together.
It tossed her a condescending look. "Hardly. After all, who am I to interrupt your sacred work?"
"You will show her respect, interloper. Straighten out your tongue and explain yourself!" I barked.
Fear glanced in it's eyes before the lesser emotion became shrouded under a mask of indifference. Eying me warily, it addressed Britta with what could have been interpreted as neutrality.
"I cannot cause physical disasters as your other half does; I tamper with the minds of humans to unleash my own form of chaos. While you two may be the root of landslides and fiery tornadoes, I am the cause of their mental distress."
Seemingly calmed, Britta prompted it to continue.
"I cause war and strife, I am the counterbalance to their inherently pure nature. I plant the seeds of doubt, let them stew and fester, and soon they begin to claw at each others throats." It smirked. "It is the most entertaining thing I have ever witnessed, although..." It regarded our closeness with amusement. "I do believe the pair of you will rise to be a close second."
I tilted my head in confusion. "Britta, what does It mean?"
She cast a worried look in my direction before It gave a cruel laugh. "You mean you haven't told the breathing time bomb? Oh, that is most interesting...I do believe you may beat out the humans yet. Go on Britta, tell the poor fool."
She glared at the invader before softening her gaze to assure me. "It means nothing. It doesn't have the capacity to understand the concept, It has been with the humans far too long."
"You were built to end the universe, Senta. And when the universe ends, where do you think you will go?" It demanded suddenly.
"Back to the unending plane, with Britta." I replied, the tone of her voice making me uncertain.
It shook it's head and set a look of pity upon its features. "Your combined powers are too great. If you end the cosmos, you will most certainly end your eternal home, as well."
At my look of devastation, she hurriedly added. "It doesn't know that for sure, none of us do."
"But you knew it was likely, and you didn't think to tell me? You didn't think I deserved to know?" I cried, the force of my emotion shifting the very fabric of reality.
"You see, Britta. Ticking. Time. Bomb." It muttered.
"Be silent," she snapped.
"Just an observation. And I would calm the child down soon. I would hate to see the end of the universe before Hitler came into power."
She shot It a questioning look before trying to reason with me. "Senta," she began. "Please listen to me."
"Why?" I sobbed, just like the child It accused me of being. The stars nearest to me began to form black holes with my anguish.
She took me into her arms, and the stars regained their light. I wrapped my arms around her and hid from their brightness in her collarbone. "It wasn't supposed to be this way, Senta. It was supposed to be simple. You were to be a tool, something to bring about the end of time."
She paused before tightening her grip, as if I would, or could, run away from her. She brokenly whispered. "I wasn't meant to care for you."
"But you do, don't you?" the stranger interrupted, realization flooding It's face. "That's why you're allowed this to go on for so long."
"Care, or love, or any of those human terms could never explain what this is." Britta said ferally. Calming under the gentle meeting of my lips and her neck, she croaked. "All it had to take was me seeing you, those trusting eyes...I could not have regarded you as tool again."
"You must make a choice eventually, Senta. Not today...but soon," It reminded quietly.
Removing myself from her embrace and ignoring her wounded features, I made my decision, and set the course for the end of everything...
