I don't own Shinrei Tantei Yakumo. If I have, this would have already happened :)
Xxx
I will say that again, my English is not that good, but I hope you can understand and like this, just like me.
The poem "As sem-razões do amor" is from a Brazilian poet who I really love, Carlos Drummond de Andrade, and this poem makes me remember Yakumo and Haruka. In English the title will be "The no-reasons of love" and you can see the translation in this link without the spaces: zmucolli . blogspot . com . br / 2011 / 01 / no - reasons - of - love - by - carlos - drummond . html
The credits of the translation of the poem is from the own of the site, I just look for this in google :P
I Hope you're enjoy!
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From the beginning I thought that I was someone who did not deserve to be loved. How could I? When the person that puts you in the world tries to get you out of the world, you come to realize that something is wrong.
For some reason I woke up suddenly in the middle of the night with that thought in my head. I opened my eyes and looked around. The small bedroom of the apartment was dark and quiet. I turned slowly and looked at the person who was with me in the single bed. She was still asleep. Lying face down with her arm around my waist and her face buried in my chest. From this angle I could only see her short brown hair and her bare back. The blanket covered her only from the waist down.
She moves lightly, mumbles something and hugs me tighter. I smile slightly and touch her hair. 'Haruka'. Her name goes through my head.
I really thought that I was someone unworthy. How not to think that when everyone looks at me like I was a freak? Except uncle, everyone treated me as something worse than trash. When I can't no longer stand the looks of contempt and disgust I started using contact lenses, but it just made me feel like I was hiding myself. I could never have a serious relationship with anyone, nor friendship, much less romantic relationship, since invariably come a day that she would see my eye. And then there would be. That looks. Disgust, fear, horror.
"Your eye is beautiful!"
When I first saw her, I could never imagine that there was something different about her. Just another customer. Just another case. At first sight there was nothing special about her. How could I be more wrong?
She was gradually showing that she was special somehow. First she notices my trick. Then when I accident discover her family drama. It was amazing how someone as gentle as she could be to blame herself for so long for an accident. She is the kind of person who would never do anything against someone on purpose. Gentle came to be a weak adjective to describe her. Since the beginning, she did everything to help her friend, even if put her in danger.
When we got back to my club room I realized that my contacts had fallen, I just came to think in getting prepared myself. Anytime it will happening, disgust. Fear. "Your eye is beautiful!"
How could she say that with that innocence, and that open face? At that moment I could only think of laughing. I remembering the time that Uncle had said. "Someday someone will accept you for who you are."
In the end he was right, but would not admit it so easily. I tried with all my might push her away, but vainly.
How could someone like her want me? Yes, she wanted me. I could deny it and pretend not to notice, but how did not realize something as serious as that when she is an honest person who just could not lie correctly? By the way, even though she bothered with her inability to lie, I could not help thinking that it was one of her best qualities. At least for me.
She was get closer slowly. She stayed with me at times when I most needed it. Even when I try to push her away. She never gave up on me and saved me when I needed it. And when I needed her support she was there, to hold my hand or to let me cry in her arms.
Gradually we were getting closer. At last my efforts to keep her away don't work anymore. Our first kiss happened naturally. I never felt nothing like the feeling of her soft lips against mine. After the first, was only natural to place another and others kisses. I started going to her apartment more often and started getting closer and closer, so it started to scare me. I was started to want her so much that it seemed wrong. One day the fear just makes me to fight with her.
"'Why me? You could be with anyone, why would you want to be with someone like me?" - As soon as the words left my mouth I began to be afraid of her answer.
"I am with you because it's you I want to stay. It is you that I love!" - Her answer surprised me more than anything and also scared me. I did not deserve. How could she love someone like me?
"'Why? Why would you love someone like me?" Again the fear of the answer was there. Instead of answering she just got up and went to the shelf and picked up a book, opened a page and handed it to me.
I looked at her confused.
"It's a poem." She explained. "Maybe you will understand it a bit."
She sat beside me and waited patiently for me to read. And then, still confused, I read the title. "As sem-razões do amor - Carlos Drummond de Andrade".
When I read the first verse I understood what she meant
"I love you because I love you!" - She repeated when she realized I had just finished reading. She looked into my eyes. In both eyes, as if the red eye was no big deal. "I love you. You love me too. So stop trying to get away, this will not work "- then she kissed me. Slowly at first, but after deepening the kiss more. I totally gave up any fight after taste her mouth and feel her tongue on mine. We kissed long and when we parted she looked back at me. Her face flushed, her red lips parted, her eyes on mine.
'I love you so much!' - She whispered with her eyes closed and I took her in my arms again. Suddenly we were lying in bed and I was on top of her. She smiled at me and pulled me into another kiss. I touched her face and she ran her hands down my back.
I had never felt anything like this before. I never felt so out of control like when her hands unbuttoning my shirt. I never see anything as beautiful as her half-naked body when I taking her shirt off.
When I realized we're both how we came to the world and could hardly know where one began and the other ended.
"Yakumo" - she sighed my name when I kissed her breasts. I looked into her eyes and said a silent question.
She pulled me closer and kissed my eye. My face. My mouth. My neck. She kissed my jaw from chin to my ear, where she whispered weakly. "I want you! I always wanted and always will want."
The sensation of having her was indescribable. Our first time was awkward as all first time probably would be, but still it was the most wonderful feeling I have ever experienced. Touch her body, hear her moans and know that was me who caused it ... feel her hands on my body and hear her voice whispering my name repeatedly.
We make love for what seemed like hours and when we lay side by side I'd already lost the will to fight.
"I love you!" - I said softly in her ear, almost afraid that she listens to me.
"I know that!" - She smiled. "But let me listen that make me more than happy."
I'm still lost in thought while step by my fingertips through her bare back as she moves and looks at me. Her eyes are sleepy, her hair nearly as messy as mine. She lifts slightly on her elbows and I can see the outline of her naked body. Nothing in the world seem so beautiful to me as she. She looks into my eyes and touches my cheek.
"Is something wrong?" - She asks me worried. I pull her close and kiss her mouth slightly.
"It's all right." I pull her closer and hug her. I slide one of my legs between her soft legs, hug her waist and pull her close, burying my face in the crook of her neck. I kiss her there and feel the shudder. I laugh.
"'Do not be so smug about it!" - She says and I know she's blushing. It makes me smile even more. She snorts a little irritated, but her hands still in my hair and she begins to caress me. She lightly kisses my forehead and it's my turn to sigh. She smiles, but then turns serious.
"I love you so much! So much that sometimes I think that love will consume me." - This little confession is enough to leave her more than embarrassed. I just pull back a bit and look into her eyes and smile.
"I think it's not really a problem if the two of us are consumed by love."
She smiles back at me with her honest face, kisses me deeply and caress me back.
I completely relax in her arms and whisper, "I love you."
She hugs me tighter and I know I'll never find a place I want more in this world than her arms. I fall asleep beside her happily and pray for that peace will never end.
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And it's it! I will really wait for reviews!
xoxo
