xig x lux

fluffy&angst!

The high of satisfaction clung to the Gambler's subconsciousness as he shifted in his monochrome colored sheets. The presence of another body made him slightly uneasy as he tried to sleep, though his body was worn and was in a cold sweat from his previous activities. His mind was restless as it tried to grasp the events that just took place. A slight mumble drew him from his thoughts that was followed by the shift of another body.

His dark eyes peered over to the pool of black hair and a battle worn face that was set in a silent expression of peace. The trace of a smile etched at the man's face as he watched his superior sleep...It was quite enchanting how childish the sharpshooter acted and how he could quickly change his face, into this serious and mature man with a steady poker face. Luxord suppressed a chuckle and settled closer to the sleeping man, letting his fingers rest on the back of his naked hips as his forehead touched the other's lightly. His eye's fell closed as he listened to the other's breathing, feeling at warm...yet cold.

It was painful being this close. Every time he could touch Xigbar his body was on fire but the cold, empty void in his chest ached; hurting him more every time II was near. But, over time Luxord had grown accustomed to this common ache, now just dismissing it with out care. He didn't want to think about it; he wanted to think about this man who is sleeping so soundly. He wanted to think about the times Xigbar made him laugh, smile, and feel. Metaphorically speaking of course. Luxord pulled the sleeping nobody closer and squeezed his eyes shut.

There was something he was always afraid of. Luxord feared that someday he might wake up and realize that this all was a dream and he wasn't cared for but alone to blindly stumbled in the darkness that accompanied his lack of emotions. To find that he never existed, and his emotions and sacrifices were made in vein all to disappear in a cloud of black. Worst of all, he feared losing Xigbar. He was too special, too indescribable and precious to lose.

Luxord clenched his teeth as his body tensed; his thoughts now turning bleak like the world they were damned to linger in. The gambler didn't realize it but Xigbar was now awake and fully pressed against his body in a tight embrace. The sharpshooter blinked and glanced up to the troubled blond, seeing such a pained expression on his face.

"Luxord?" Xigbar inquired in a sleepy voice as he inched up closer to the other's face. Luxord opened his eyes and looked down cast. He was slightly ashamed to have woken up the other. "Anything the matter?" II asked as he gave a lopsided grin; ready to listen to the Gambler. Luxord blushed slightly and shook his head stiffly before burying his face in Xigbar's neck, breathing softly. The older male closed his eyes again and cuddled with Luxord contently as his fingers massaged the back of his neck and the base of his scalp.

"I'm afraid...Of losing you, Xigbar." The Gambler admitted as he placed a soft kiss over a bruise on the other's neck. Xigbar stopped his movements and stiffened before hugging the other back.

"I'll never be lost Luxord; I'm always in your memory...Beside's where do you think I'm going so soon! I'm not that old," the brunette joked half heartily before pulling away to kiss Luxord briefly, successfully calming his thoughts. Luxord closed his eyes as the kiss broke and settled his head into a pillow, now feeling better.

Maybe...He didn't need to be afraid.

Maybe this love was all he needed.

Luxord desperately hoped that this was the real thing, the real Xigbar and his real emotions.