Moi ô¿ô: My muse, Person 1 has finally shown himself! HAHAHAA! Now I can force him to inspire me whenever I want!
Person 1: Whew...Thanks for saving me man. Yuffie was starting to scare me...
Yuffie: GRR!! What do I do for a muse!?
Moi ô¿ô: Inspire yourself with this. *hands Yuffie a tarantula*
Yuffie: EEK!! *trips onto the Red Fic-Start lever*
The Fic Begins.

Final Fantasy 7-Meets-Final Fantasy 8 (Warning: This could Get Ugly)

Part One- Materia Or Junction?!?!?

By Moi ô¿ô (And the crew of Random Acts Of Insanity!)

Disclaimer: Moi ô¿ô owns nothing mentioned in this fic, expecpt for part of the soon-to-be TV show, Random acts of Insanity!! See Author profile for copyright info.

Irvine paces back and forth in his and Squall's room, in an unusual blue trench coat.

Squall: Stay back!! *trips up the stairs, pointing his gunblade at the door*

Rinoa (On the other side pf the door): But I want a huuuuuuuug!!!!!!

Irvine: Squall.....You too huh?

Squall: That woman is driving me insane....

Irvine: *holds up large locks of his hair, which are peculiarly rippled * Selphie got ahold of the curlers! Look!

Squall: What the?? *stares*

Irvine: If she gets ahold of the curlers one more time....*shakes his clenched fist*

Squall: *looks Irvine over* Why are their hearts on your unsusal blue trench coat?

Irvine: Why do you think?

Squall: *nodds sympathecitally*

Irvine: Selphie stole my gun.....I would have done anything. Anything to put a bullet right through her head, and she went and stole my gun.

Squall: Here, man. *hands Irvine his gun blade*

Irvine: *gets all big-eyed, and manic* Oh, Selphieeeeeeeeeeeeee!

????: THUD!

Squall and Irvine look around.

Squall: The sound effects guy was fired wasn't he?

????: I said THUD!!!!

Squall and Irvine look over to the nearby bed where none other that YUFFIE sits, under a large hole in the roof.

Yuffie: Damn emergency exit! *realizes that Squall is pointing his gun blade at her throat* Uhhh....hi!

Squall: *monotone* Who are you?

Yuffie: *leans over in Irvine's direction* Sup?

Squall: Where did you come-*Yuffie grabs his gun blade*

Yuffie: Where's the materia? *looks the gun blade over thouroughly* There're no materia slots!! That sucks!

Squall: Is materia a drug?

Irvine: Probably...But look...*points to Yuffie* Its another one of those damn women!

Squall: ..........*looks at Yuffie again* Are you sure?

Yuffie: I'm a GIRL!!

Irvine: Yeah...I'm sure..that annoying sound! Her hair could almost be Selphie's!

Yuffie swings her hair, and Irvine falls to his knees.

Yuffie: *walks up to Irvine* Don't worry guy...I'll help you....Just gimmie your materia!!!!! *feels all around Irvine's coat*

Irvine: AHH!!! *falls over*

Squall: Are you looking for drugs?

Yuffie: *walks up to Squall and looks him over* Where's the materia?

Irvine: *shaking* We're not drug dealers....

Yuffie: *innocent look* I don't recall materia being a drug... *moves her feet around sheepishly*

Squall: What is this materia you speak of?

Yuffie: Materia's great!! Its like, you take it and equip it in your weapons, and then everything goes WOOSH!!! *makes hand motions*

Squall and Irvine start to laugh.

Yuffie: And you use it to cure, and-

Squall: *looks at the ground and snorts*

Yuffie: Look at me when I'm talking to you!

Irvine: Its definately drugs....

Yuffie: But....Its used for magic!

Squall: Ohhhh! You mean the junction. *hands Yuffie his gun blade, and points to a tiny tiny tiny tiny crystal* This controls the junction magic.

Yuffie: No materia.......But...I used my ultima materia to kick Sephiroth's butt!! Ha-ha! Slice slice! and he was all like "AHHHHH!!!!" *puts her hand on her chest*

Squall: Whats a Sephiroth?

Irvine: *shrugs*

Yuffie: Actually, he was an "Ancient", well, Aeris was an Ancient, and he had this long silver hair, and these creepy icy eyes, and he was all like, "you are puppets!"

Irvine: *crazy look* *takes the gunblade from Squall* I have a gunblade! *points it at Yuffie*

Yuffie: Oh, Is that what that is-Ack! *gets held in place by Squall*

Irvine: *reaches for the trigger, when he realizes....* Its broken!!! Squall, did Rinoa get ahold of this?

Squall: She was hugging it....

Irvine: She completely smashed the trigger!

Yuffie: *out of the blue* Gimmie a hug!! *hugs Squall*

Squall: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Irvine: AHG! *points the gun blade at Yuffie* Make it stop!!!

Yuffie: I just want some materia! ..................*looks around*.................Peace???? Ugghh... I'm gonna KILL Cid, why'd he drop me here in this freaky land!?

Irvine: O.O What do you have with the headmaster!?

Yuffie: He....He dropped me out of an airplane!

Irvine: Cid can pilot? How long has he been keeping that from us? But look how much damage has been done to your gun blade!!

Squall: *looks and passes out*

Yuffie: Oh, would ya look at that................There's gotta be materia somewhere!

Irvine: Back!

Yuffie: I just wanna-Ha-ha! *snatches the gun blade, runs out of the room, and drilling noises are heard*

Squall: *gets up* Ugghh.....*hears the drilling and stares*

Yuffie: *comes back* GUYS! I figured out how to equip materia! See? You just drill a hole here, and , and, and, and-

Squall: My.....gun blade... *sniff*

Yuffie: And isn't it great!? ^_^

Irvine: *takes the gun blade* Yessssss! I know how to use this materia now.... DIE!! *points the blade at Yuffie*

Yuffie: Umm...there's no spell called DIE!!, and I'll t.......e..........l..........l.......y.......o......u......a........n..........o........t.......h..........e.......r..........t.........h........i........n.......g..........

Irvine: Yes.........slow....

Yuffie: H....a.................s............t.........e! Heygimmiethatthingwoo-hoo!!
*jumps on Irvine and reaches for the gun blade*

Irvine: *tosses the gun blade to Squall and runs for the phone*

Squall: Silence!!

Yuffie: *makes angry hand motions* ...................................

Irvine: Hello? Funny Farm? Do you take crazy people!?

Yuffie: *recovers* How DARE you silence me?! *slapps Squall, and takes the gun blade*

Squall: *glares at Yuffie*

Yuffie: Woah.......this guy's like....ummm.......Manipulate! Dance my little minion!

Squall: *waltzes with himself*

Yuffie: Stop! You! *turns to Irvine* Manipulate! Dance for me!

Irvine: *dances*

Yuffie: *to the audience* Arn't we having fuuuuuuuuuuun? *makes everyone normal*

Irvine: AHH! *takes 45 pills at once*

Squall: I'm going to KILL you!!

Yuffie: Is that asprin!? Did I tell you that you could take it!?

Irvine: Girl.....I'd rather have Ultimecia, Adel and Seifer here all at once than YOU!!

Yuffie: Ummm....Does that mean you're my friend!? ^_^

Squall and Irvine: AGGHHHHH!!!

Irvine: *slashes at Yuffie*

Yuffie: MY HAIR!!!!!! Thats it!!! *walks outside*

Squall: .............She....She's gone!!!

Irvine: She's gone! *hugs Squall*

Yuffie: *sneaks in* Gauntlet!! *blasts Irvine*

Irvine: AGH!

Squall: What have you done?!

Yuffie: Bloodfest! *slapps Squall around*

Funny Farm Person: *knocks on the door* This is the Funny Farm.

Yuffie: *opens the door* Them!! They tried to kill me!! *points at Irvine and Squall*

Funny Farm Person: Alright. *injects Irvine and Squall with tranquilizers, and carries them off*

Squall: This......Isn't...Right!....

Irvine: Heeelp meeeeeee..........

Yuffie: *closes the door, and Squall and Irvine get taken away* I'm sorry you had to see that folks...but sometimes these things happen. Have a nice day! ^_^ ^_^ ^_^

End Chapter One. ô¿ô