Author's Note: Hello everyone! So basically, ever since seeing Desolation of Smaug about a month ago, I have been wholly obsessed with Fili and Kili. And I do mean obsessed. As such this was born. Firstly, it seems to me that given dwarves apparent slower aging that a five year old dwarfling is not the same thing as a five year old human. As such I am aware that Fili is probably thinking way too coherently here. But writing children is not a strength I have, and I was half imagining this as an older Fili reflecting on the night. So maybe look at it that way, with him editing his memory into better words. Or yell at me for poorly writing children, whatever I guess. Also, according to my parents when I was little and they told me that I was going to have a little brother or sister I completely rejected the idea of a brother and was certain I was going to have a little sister. I do have a sister, so happy ending for me, but it was an idea I wanted to use for Fili as well, except that he would reject the idea of sister in favor of brother. Which he gets too, so happy ending for him as well. I can't remember what else I needed to say here, I don't own the Hobbit.
Also, even though my computer hates to let me put in things like accents, I tricked it. So every correctly accented Fili or Kili is a victory over my computer and I am ridiculously proud of it.
Reviews would be really, really awesome. Let me know what you thought!
"Fíli?" the dwarfling opened his eyes with a start, frowning in displeasure. He hadn't meant to fall asleep, but the way his body was curled against the wall and his eyes reluctantly blinked at the light told him that he had done just that. How could he have fallen asleep at a time like this? If something had happened to Mama while he'd been dozing he would never forgive himself. He pushed his tired little body away from the wall as Da moved in the room towards him. It was only then that Fíli realized he was alone in the great room, his Uncle had been sitting with him before he fell victim to the treacherous sleep, he could remember his slight amused expression, despite the worry in his eyes as he puffed on his pipe and Fíli attempted to understand what was going on.
"Uncle?" he asked sleepily, looking up into his father's brown eyes that were filled, to Fíli's relief, with unadulterated joy.
"He's gone out for a minute." Da told him, tucking a lock of blond hair gently behind his son's ear. "There is someone I'd like you to meet." His words renewed Fíli's excitement and he nodded eagerly at his father.
"My brother?" The older dwarf laughed at son's surety, the beads on the end of his braided blond beard shaking with the motion.
"Aye, Fíli. Your brother." Feigning a responsible composure that he did not feel, Fíli nodded again, less vigorously this time. A swarm of fluttering butterflies had settled into his stomach. He had a brother.
"Is he with Mama?" It was Da's turn to nod, and as he did so he held his hand out to Fíli who took it eagerly and slid from his seat.
Da led him by the hand across the floor of the great room and into the dimly lit hallway. When they reached the closed door to the room where Fíli's parent's slept, he paused and kneeled down so that he could look his young son in the eye.
"Fíli, do you know what it means to be a big brother?" he asked him in the tone that Fíli knew required a grown up answer.
He thought hard, scrunching his face up as he carefully considered the question. Since he had first learned that he was to be a brother he had received countless words of warning and advice from virtually everyone he knew. The children had given him the most troubling accounts; stories of how no one would know he existed after the baby was born or how the youngest would always have the best of everything. From adults he received graver pieces of information; that he would have to serve as role model, that he would have to be patient with the child and kind to his weary mother. Fíli had listened to all their words carefully, but he was not sure that their assessment would match what it would be like. He couldn't say why, but he was positive that he had always wanted to be an older brother.
"I think so," he told Da seriously. His father placed a hand gently onto either one of his shoulders. Da looked pleased.
"It won't always be easy." He told him softly. "Little brothers can be trying things. A lot is going to change now for our family, but one thing that will never change is how much your mother and I love you." Da must have been even more moved by the addition to the family than even Fíli was, because he wrapped him a strong hug. "We are so proud of you, Little Lion, and I know that you will help your brother to grow up just as good and brave as you are." Fíli had scarcely seen Da as emotional, and it brought a trickle of fear back into him. Was there something wrong with his brother? With Mama?
Before Fíli could voice such concerns his father was standing and again grasped his tiny hand within his large, strong one. "You'll have to be very quiet," he told him as he turned the door handle. "Your brother is sleeping."
Da pushed the wooden door open and stood with Fíli on the threshold while he gaped in. Mama was lying on the bed, looking exhausted but simply aglow with joy. She smiled at her oldest and Fíli would have run to her, but the sight of the wrapped bundle clasped against her had turned his legs to jelly.
The bundle was nothing like what he had been imagining, but still he knew instinctively that it was his brother.
"Mama?" he asked uncertainly, Da held out an arm in open invitation to enter but Fíli still just stood there clinging to his hand.
"Would you like to meet your brother, wee one?" she asked, patting the space beside her on the bed.
Fíli nodded self-consciously; suddenly afraid that he would somehow ruin the tiny bundle that was his brother by his mere presence. He looked up at his father uncertainly, and Da smiled down at him proudly offering a slight nod.
"Go on, Fíli." At last he accepted their invitation, and moving along the floor as quietly as possible clambered up onto the bed beside his mother. She smiled at him, allowing him to nest himself against her side before repositioning the open face of the bundle so that he could see his brother.
"Fíli, this is Kíli." She said gently, running a finger along the tiny face. Inside the bundle was the tiniest person that Fíli had ever seen. He was redder than any grown person, with hands so tiny that they would have disappeared inside Fíli's, and Fíli's hands had a tendency to entirely disappear when clasped by adults.
He stared down at the softly slumbering form and felt his heart swelling with pride. "Kíli," he breathed, not daring to take his eyes off his brother lest Mahal decide to swiftly take him away. He liked the way the name felt on his lips. He was relieved that it was easy to say, made almost entirely of the same sounds as his name, sounds he had mastered years ago. "Kíli." He repeated, despite the familiarity it felt vastly different than his own name.
Kíli stirred slightly in Mama's arms, one of his tiny arms moving almost imperceptibly in Fíli's direction. He looked quickly to his mother for permission and when she nodded he reached out a hand to touch his brother's warm pink skin. For a moment nothing happened, but then Kíli's eyes opened. Fíli's heart fell, certain that he had been the cause of his waking and he prepared himself for the baby's cries knowing that they would be his fault.
But Kíli did not cry, instead he lay in his bundle of blankets looking at his brother. Fíli had been warned that when the baby came he would not be old enough to do a great many things. He had known that he wouldn't be able to play, or walk, or talk or even to laugh for a time. They had told him that his brother would not understand most things for a very long time, that he would not even know who he was until he was older. When Kíli gaped up at him with wide brown eyes, his tiny nose twitching, Fíli knew instantly that they were wrong. His brother was looking at him.
"Hello Kíli," he whispered to the minute figure. "I'm your big brother, Fíli."
There was no indication from Kíli that the words 'big brother' had any meaning to him, but that didn't matter because they had meaning to Fíli. It was then, as he leaned against his mother and watched baby Kíli drift back toward sleep that Fíli realized he had lied to his father. He had not meant to of course, had not even understood that what he had been saying was a lie. But it had been just the same.
Standing outside that door, thinking hard over every piece of advice and warning that had been given to him in the past months he had not known what it meant to be a big brother.
He knew it now though. Looking at Kíli, at the tiny, squirmy bundle that he knew would one day be able to accompany him on all sorts of adventures; he knew exactly what his new status meant. It meant that he would have to responsible, like when Uncle brought home gifts that he had to swear not to bring outside. Kíli was infinitely more precious than everything he owned, that he knew already, and when he could someday follow him he would have to make sure that he did not allow any harm to befall him. It meant he'd have to protect him. Anyone who would hurt his brother would have to answer to him. It meant that he was not the baby anymore. He was going to have to be a grown up now, so that someone could look ahead for Kíli's sake.
"Well?" his father inquired, leaning his hands on the foot of the bed. "Is he as impressive as you hoped?"
Fíli nodded his assent, turning from his baby brother to his father and finally to his mother. "He's perfect." He said seriously, trying his best to settle into his new ever mature role.
"Aye," Mama agreed, placing a kiss on top of Fíli's blond head. "He certainly is."
