Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto. Also don't own the phone call.
Warning: any mistakes are mine and mine alone.
Phone Call
Sasuke was sitting in the family library reading some of the Uchiha scrolls when the phone began to ring. The scroll was full of fire jutsu. Sasuke felt he needed to learn more in order to combat Naruto's new wind jutsu. When the phone continued to ring Sasuke buried his head further into the scroll trying to pretend it wasn't ringing. He was beginning to think he should have changed the number when Naruto told him he saw Kakashi handing out his phone number to his fan-girls in revenge for a fire jutsu on his Ich Ich Paradise. But Sasuke was a Uchiha. He was untouchable. He was unflappable. He was unbeatable. He was unflinching. He was ... beginning to get really irritated, the phone had been ringing non stop for the past hour and a half. Throwing the scroll down Sasuke marched towards the living room and grabbed the phone of its cradle.
"What?" He snarled into the receiver. There was silence on the other side for a few seconds.
"Butt plug."
"What?" Sasuke said looking at the phone.
"Butt plug."
"I'm sorry, could you repeat that." Sasuke said sure he had heard wrong.
"Butt plug."
Sasuke blinked, saying nothing and looking blankly at the phone.
" Butt plug."
"What? Pug?" Sasuke replied, determined that he had miss-heard.
"Butt plug."
"I don't have a pug." Sasuke told the caller.
"Butt plug."
"Kakashi has a pug, if that's what you're looking for." Sasuke informed the person moving towards the window , just to see if there was anyone watching.
"BUTT PLUG"
"I'm sorry, What?"
"Butt plug."
"I don't have any sort of plug. Call the hardware store." Sasuke said.
"Butt plug."
"Who is this?" Sasuke questioned.
"Butt Plug."
"How did you get this number." he demanded.
"Butt plug."
"Did Kakashi give you this number? Sasuke asked "He hates me." he said morosely.
"Butt plug."
"Did someone put you up to this? Kakashi? Naruto?" Sasuke questioned.
"Butt plug."
"i don't have a butt plug." Sasuke denied, ignoring the chibi Sasuke running around in his head screaming "Deny! Deny! Deny!!!" at the top of his little lungs.
"Butt plug, Butt plug, Butt plug." Yelled the voice on the other end of the phone. Sasuke could feel his eyebrow beginning to twitch.
"I will hang up on you" He threatened.
"Butt plug."
Sasuke remained silent, listening for something, anything that would give the identity of the person away. Hearing nothing at all Sasuke was determined that the caller would say something first. Both Sasuke and the mystery caller remained silent for a good ten minuets.
"Butt plug."
"Ha! I won! You spoke first!...Oh my god, I'm turning into the Dobe. Sasuke said in despair.
"Butt plug."
"Shut up!" Sasuke said.
"Butt plug."
"Shut up!!" Sasuke growled.
"Butt plug."
"Shut up!!!" Sasuke yelled. Breathing deeply he tried to control his anger. He couldn't afford to buy more furniture for the living room if he katoned everything.
"he he he, Butt plug."
"I will find you." Sasuke stated." And when I do, I swear it will make Ibiki look like a rookie in torture."
"Butt plug."
"Grrr."
Listening to Sasuke growl down the phone at them the caller chuckled and soon broke into outright laughter at the Uchiha.
"He he he, Believe it!!"
In the few seconds it took for the phrase to connect in Sasukes head the phone was replaced and the dial tone was all that Sasuke's head. Drawing a deep breath Sasuke looked at the phone.
Across town in a small apartment in the poorer region of Konoha, Naruto gingerly replaced the phone and backed away slowly looking at the device as though it would explode at any minuet.
"NARUTO!!!!"
"Oh Shit!" Naruto whispered, picking up his ninja tools and ran.
End
