Why I Cannot Come

Disclaimer - All characters etc are the property of Tolkien and I have made no money from using them.

A/N - This was intended to be the epilogue to a longer Glorfindel POV story about his feelings for Elrond, mainly set immediately after Celebrain's death. However, due to pressure from school and work I do not have time to write this, and felt that I may as well upload this as a stand-alone. Hopefully, it works well.

Peredhril

I said farewell to you once already, yesterday in the Hall of Fire where we ate and laughed and remembered. Maybe I said my true farewell to you years before when you took Celebrian's hand and wed, or on that day when she bore you the twins, or when she left and you stayed. Let me say it once more.

When I returned from Mandos you were here. Your hand reached out when I stumbled, you voice reached me through deepest torment. Maybe to you, it was not such a thing of praise as it seemed to me - I have seen you do as much or more for others beyond count. And yet, when I had no one you were there and I am glad to this day for your actions.

You healed me when I was hurt, comforted me when I sorrowed. But after the Last Alliance you lay in my arms and wept as a child, for Gil-Galad your King and Elendil, the first of your mortal friends. To you I owe everything. We have shared six and a half thousand years together, passed days unnumbered side by side.

Yet, my Lord I cannot follow you. Celebrian waits for you and your heart is bound to hers. You have no need for me now, and to see you with her, loving her and not me when I alone have had you these past two thousand years.

Elrond, I have never said these words to you through all these years, yet I will say them now. Forgive them if you will. I love you with all my heart, forever, for what that is worth to you. Why? I do not know. I know only that I love you - when others asked me whom I waited for, I smiled and did not reply. I was waiting for you and you were -are- with Celebrian.

I love her because she loves you, yet I would fight to take to take her place, in your hear and arms and bed. Aye, I who swore never to lift a hand to hurt life.

Do not regret what you have read - I made my decision long ago and I have lived with it. You, unknowing have aided me. And now, without you, I shall still cope with this. Just one favour I ask my Lord, do not forget me and the friendship we had.

Now there is no more I can say. How can I end so many years of companionship when we will never meet again? There is no way, so farewell, my beloved. A star shine on the hour of our parting.

Glorfindel