I never wanted anything to happen to my parents, I never wanted to act on my forbidden desires, these impulses. Atlast someone made me well triggered it. I was a good kid went to school, did my best, practiced the violin and was amazingly talented, at a young age I already knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to follow in the footsteps of my parents, I wanted to be a doctor. The age of five my mother and father started teaching me.

Returning home the fuhrer was waiting at my home. That night the Fuhrer wanted to have a meeting with my father. I returned to my room to practice, until I heard a loud crash downstairs and heavy laughing.

Slowly going down the stairs I saw four mean leaning over my mother. One was on top of her. I slowly creeped staying in the shadows till reaching the fireplace.

Grabbing the iron poker I made way to a guy his back to me and with all my might shoved it where his spine ends making him drop.

The other three seemed too focused on my mother, then I realized that before they were to kill my mother they were going to rape her. I lost the my calm and acted on impulse. I grabbed a pen off the side table walking slowly and stabbed the next man repeatedly, by this time the other two took notice.

This time one brought his knife sticking me and giving me a nasty line from the top of my left eye to my chin to the bottom right. I also could no longer see. Out of pain and adrenaline I grabbed a walking stick and beat the man till he stopped moving. The last man stumbled away in horror causing him to fall. Slowly I reached him his eyes filled with fear, he was already begging me to stop.

Bringing my hands his neck I traced around it till I started to squeeze. The feeling was different it was new, I felt his heart pound in his chest, his pulse racing under my fingertips the light fading from his eyes, his budy struggling under my tiny body. There was this rush I had thought about doing things like this but never acted or told my parents.

What felt like hours was only ten minutes my father walked through the door seeing me crying over my mother's body. I was drenched in blood my hands on the wound of my mother, one of the men was still alive and crying in pain. When I looked to see his face he was staring at me with anger but his actions told me I was not in trouble. He checked for a pulse finding none he went over the man.

"What happened Josef?"

I let my tears run down my face, my heavy breathing was all I could do. I watched my father cheeked the man mumbling about him not being able to walk again. The mumbling from my father continued till the man lost it.

"That bloody kid did this! He killed my friends"

" ?" my voice was weak and horse. His eyes found mine and soften and all he did was nod his head. The next twenty four hours where a blur I don't understand what happened, I remember waking in my father's office with great pain in my head. My father explained that he had to fix my left eye and the scar that ran across my face.

Father was hurting as well and all I could do was listen to him and tell him nothing like this would never happen again, to him or I. I made a vow to hurt people hurt wanted to hurt other people, and to not trust anyone unless the earn mine. My vision became very fixed on killing americans. The next three days I returned home to find the mess was still there but my mother's body was removed. Father had meetings back to back so I was left to myself, which I was enjoying. One evening all I could focus on was the blood stains on the floor, then this urge to feel it we and on my skin was unbearable.

I did the only thing I could do while giving into the urge, I cleaned it up. Running upstairs to change into shorts leaving my shirt on my bed I quickly grabbed a bucket with warm water mixed with soap and a sponge. I gently dripped water all over to make it wet kneeling down I ran my fingers through it. The feeling was amazing it felt like silk on my finger. Soaking the blood up then wringing it out was even better it traveled down my hand then my arm. I closed my eyes enjoying the feeling, then slowly it trickled down my side, i have never felt so excited before.

Seeing that I needed more clean water I stood only to find myself lose balance, I fell face first pain shot through my eye. I got up and fetched more water, upon returning I stared at the clean spot remembering that night. Licking my lips I tasted iron, realizing that I had not wiped the blood off. The taste as well was nice, the taste of copper and iron made me want more. Though I fought that urge I needed to wash up and head to bed, I had school and needed to catch up on work and practice.