Disclaimer: D Gray Man belongs to Katsura Hoshino and Gintama to Hideaki Sorachi. I wrote this for my own amusement only.

Author's note: This is Alma's attempt at a "happily ever after" in another world, to which she/he got the same was as Edward Elric has gotten to Earth. That being said, it can be read with no knowledge of D Gray Man or (obviously) Fullmetal Alchemist.

Reviews and favs make me happy. Please make me happy: rabbits die when they get sad and lonely ;)


Self-indulgence is the shortest way to a disaster

Chapter 1: There is never a second chance at making a good first impression

She woke up very confused. It was quiet, warm and more comfortable than she could understand. There was a faint smell in the air, something she couldn't identify, replacing the familiar scent of blood and sterile air. There was also pain, but nothing like what she was sure she should be feeling. She was sure that he should be lying in a pool of his own blood from countless cuts inflicted by the unforgiving steel.

There was a woman by her bed, who explained, in a language she somehow understood if only barely, that somebody found her, half-dead, by the river. She didn't know what a river was back then. She didn't know anything except: she couldn't tell that woman what she was. So she pretended to have forgotten everything, except for her- his name. It was a foreign name that nobody could quite pronounce and caused confusion, but she wasn't letting go of it. His name and his memories, and hers before, were all she had.

The confusion continued and grew. Beyond any doubt, she was a girl, yet she clearly remembered dying as a boy. She remembered waking up as a boy, the pain of forced synchronization and the thrill of having a friend. She remembered dying as a woman. She knew, beyond any doubt, she had to keep all that a secret from the kind woman and her family, just like she had to keep her abilities a secret.

At least his weapon, his leash, was gone. Once she could finally feel past the overwhelming terror of they-will-find-me and the chocking grief of where-is-my-most-precious-person, she could feel the unnatural weapon missing. It felt like a hole in her chest, like a missing limb. It was the most amazing feeling in the world, because that weapon was dirty with blood.

It took her a long time to stop gagging at the memories of what he has done before the other has stopped him. She didn't even try to understand what has happened. He died, perhaps once for each life he has taken. He died and then she woke up. And it was so difficult to breathe.

It took her even longer to overcome the grief.

The kind woman became her mother and taught her about the world, patient in the face of her lack of understanding. The woman's husband became her father and gently discouraged her from fighting and learning to fight. Their son became her brother and even though she tried to hate him, because he wasn't cold and short-tempered, she couldn't. Slowly, she became the daughter they wanted to have. As she grew into her new role, all the while fastidiously keeping her/his secrets, she found friends that he has been so desperate to have. Eventually, her adopted father made an agreement with his friend and promised she would marry his son. And although she couldn't love the boy, she could never love anybody but him, she didn't hate him either.

Her most precious person became a sad memory. And while she didn't forget, she didn't quite think about him so much, busy living in the bright world she has found herself in. It was only some evenings, when she couldn't sleep, when she wondered where he was and what he was doing. She hoped he has found some friends. She hoped he was happy. She hoped that, one day, she would meet him again.

Her own, fragile happiness shattered when the war came closer to her village. Men got called to fight. Her adopted father got called and left with barely a good bye, promising to be back before they had the chance to miss him. Her adopted brother left too, to join the Kiheitai, despite their mother's tearful begging. The boy to whom she was promised went to find the White Demon and fight for him. Her adopted mother cried every evening.

She knew war. Or rather, she has known war, although her memories were foggy at best. They were painful enough, because he has died in war and he has been reborn to fight their enemy, they have both been, only to fight each other instead. She has known death and so has he and now she wanted to live. She wanted to fight, to bring back her family, but she knew she couldn't leave her adopted mother and so they waited together.

None of the men came back to the village.

She didn't need an explanation. Through grief and nightmares, where her reality mixed with his, she went on. Out of necessity, she learnt again how to defend herself and her home and eventually there was no trace left of the lady she was supposed to be. She became what he could, would have grown up into and it was more symbolic than anybody around her realized when she cut her hair short.

The war left the world in disarray. Deserters from both armies became bandits and the villages without men were easy targets. And although she was stronger and faster than them all, unarmed against a whole bunch with katana she stood no chance: eventually, one of them delivered a killing blow. As she was falling to the ground, as sounds and images faded away, it was not her memories that flashed through her head, it was his.

And then the air smelled blood again and he was back in the sterile lab, the same but completely different. And he was there as well, grown up and more breath-taking than she has ever thought possible. And he/she wanted nothing more than to hug tight the only person he/she has ever loved, but now he almost knew and something snapped. They fought. Again. He died. Again. Only this time they reconciled before he was gone. This time, he wasn't left behind all alone.

She woke up to the smell of cherry blossoms.

Her adopted mother hasn't survived the grief. The broken woman has faded away after the war and her adopted daughter's near death was the last straw. Finally, there was at least one body in the family grave. As she attended the small funeral, having recovered marvellously fast from what everybody has thought was a fatal wound, she wondered if that also counted as a casualty of war, but there was no one to answer her questions and she didn't voice them anyway. Instead, she sold everything and, in silence, left the village for Edo because the village held too many memories.

Edo taught her many things. For one, she quickly learnt that her village was as far from "the whole world" as his sterile lab has been. She was immensely glad she has passed through that intermediate step, between the lab and Edo, for even knowing about the world hasn't quite prepared her for the shock of encountering it.

Her short hair and somewhat boyish figure were misleading and alternated between helping her and hindering her in her new life. All the same, the troublemakers in the city, and there were many, quickly learned that it was not worth the pain to disturb her and that got her noticed by the police. They were looking for ways of softening their image, or something along those lines, and she agreed to work for them.

Then, one day, she saw wanted posters of one of the rebel leaders and realized, with a strangled gasp, that she was fighting for the wrong side.

})i({

It wasn't often that the Shogun sanctioned new festivities and thus Edo's first ever, official Cherry Blossom Viewing Festival was drawing both attention and enthusiasm. While every park could and had its own festivities, what most people were looking forward to were the events supposed to take place in the castle's gardens nonetheless. Katsura has been muttering about "silly attempts at warming the Bakufu's image" with disgust for a week now and for once Gintoki agreed with him. Not that he said anything out loud. The last thing he needed was the damned wig-head getting ideas.

On the plus side, the preparations for the festivities meant loads of smaller and bigger assignments for the Odd Jobs, so many in fact that they had to split up to cater to all the clients that came flowing through their doors as the festival was drawing near.

"Please deliver this package to the stall my shop is building in the park."

"One of my carpenters has fallen sick, please replace him."

"I need help in my shop, while I prepare the stall for the festivities."

"Please dissimulate this time bomb inside the Shogun's vehicle."

They were all similar jobs and all straightforward, although Gintoki made sure to verify them for stupid Joui jokes before sharing the duties as he believed most efficient. Katsura, using badly made up nicknames, offered good pay and he couldn't trust Kagura to resist the temptation on her own. As things were, the Yato girl, on Sadaharu's back, handled all the deliveries. They were by far the most numerous, but also the fastest to deal with. Shinpachi, who was the most reasonable of the three of them, handled shop help, which was either looking after the shop or packing for the festivities.

All that left Gintoki with setting up the stalls and decorations in the castle gardens. Under the cheerful sun and the slowly unfolding cherry blossoms, he laboured until he could barely stand, because of course everything was done in the last minute. But the pay was good, perhaps the best out of all types of assignments, because those who wanted to impress and found themselves short of workers were the most desperate of clients.

'How's it going, Gin-chan?' yelled Kagura as she thundered past on Sadaharu's back. Gintoki looked up from the plank of wood he was nailing right on time to see her almost flatten a police patrol to the ground. The reckless girl laughed as Sadaharu jumped over the indignant Shinsengumi, followed by the first captain Okita's loud complaints. Gintoki went back to nailing, pretending he has seen nothing.

'Are you never going to bring up your kids properly?' grumbled the vice-commander moments later, coming up to the stall Gintoki was finishing up. He didn't bother looking over.

'Are you never going to stop carrying emergency mayonnaise rations?' he asked back in a flat tone. He could not deny the satisfaction he felt when he heard an annoyed huff of Hijikata, but he forgot it immediately when an unknown, female voice chimed in cheerfully:

'Putting mayonnaise on food usually makes it better and not all restaurants have it.'

'Adding mayonnaise always makes food better,' Hijikata corrected sternly, while Gintoki turned around to see the third member of the patrol.

The first thing he noticed was the messy, black hair and the weird, horizontal scar across the bridge of the nose. The young woman, and it took him a moment to realize that the loose, Shinsengumi jacket hid a slim, female figure with small breasts, was somewhat shorter than Hijikata. She was looking up at him with curiously with bright, blue eyes, her expression matching her tone: cheerful.

'Did I see you before?' he asked. 'You're one of those women the Shinsengumi took to look more welcoming, right?' he turned to Hijikata. 'You should have chosen women with big breasts, I can barely see that this one's not a guy,' he commented. Hijikata rolled his eyes and took out a cigarette. The woman, on the other hand, kicked the ladder on which Gintoki was standing and it wobbled dangerously.

'Is this really something you should be saying to a woman?' she complained. All the same, Gintoki could see that she didn't really care. If it had been Otae, she would have kicked him across the whole garden just for those words. Tsukuyo would have stabbed him with a kunai for less. Sarutobi would- well, he preferred to not think about that. However, right as Gintoki was starting to think that he could like this woman, she kicked the ladder again, somewhat harder.

'Oi, oi, is this really something a police officer should be doing?' Gintoki protested, gripping the ladder tightly when the wobbling threatened to dislodge him from his place. Before the woman managed to retort, Hijikata cleared his throat, efficiently getting their attention.

'Anyway, Odd Jobs, did you see anything suspicious around here while working on the preparations?' he asked. Gintoki gave him a blank stare. 'There are worries that some insurgents might use the festivities to make a point,' he added as explanation. Gintoki shrugged.

'I didn't look around,' he lied flatly. There were two reasons he took all the jobs on the spot, while sending the kids away: besides intercepting and shredding all of Katsura's requests, he wanted to make sure the stupid terrorist didn't come and plant any bombs in person. Not that he was planning to share that with the Shinsengumi, or even less inform them that the idiot had shown up and got blackmailed into helping Gintoki, under the threat of being presented to the police.

'You're a bit useless, boss, aren't you?' Okita asked, coming up to them. He was dusting his uniform off and Gintoki could only guess what happened: a fight with Kagura. He hoped they didn't destroy anything because he was more than ready to finish working now. He jumped off the ladder, before Okita could get it into his head to kick it from under him.

'Nevermind, we're going to be down here during the festivities anyway,' the woman interjected, before Gintoki could grumble in reply. 'Some of us will be undercover also, so if any uninvited person shows up, we'll be able to intercept them,' she added, looking at Hijikata as she spoke. It was interesting information, Gintoki thought. It would have been if he was concerned, he amended.

'Are you getting a wig to look more like a woman?' he asked and she turned to him sharply.

'Are you going to continue insulting me?' she complained half a second too late for it to be the real reason of her reaction. Gintoki briefly entertained a thought that she was already wearing a wig, especially when she continued, sounding really bothered: 'I don't even know your name and I wish I have kicked that ladder harder.'

'Now, now, lady, I'm sorry,' Gintoki raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. 'My name's Gintoki Sakata and I'm a jack of all trades in Kabuki-cho, so whenever you have a problem, don't hesitate to come and ask for help,' he introduced himself with what he hoped was a charming smile. It's been a while since he tried and succeeded to be charming. 'Please don't kick me,' he added and she laughed out.

He couldn't help thinking that her laughter sounded nice. It made him want to smile.

'My name's Alma Karma and I am a police officer in Edo. Whenever you see a criminal please don't hesitate to find me and ask for help,' she mimicked his introduction cheerfully and they shook hands. Gintoki was really proud for keeping his smile on his face.

'We're wasting our time,' Hijikata commented. Okita complained that he was no fun, but followed when the vice-commander turned to leave. Karma hesitated for a moment, before saluting Gintoki with a bright smile and then turning on her heel to catch up with her superiors. Gintoki watched her hold her hands behind her back, arms stretched, as she turned to Hijikata and said something cheerfully.

He still kept the smile, in case she looked back, but the expression faded as soon as he turned back to the stall he has been finishing. Her last words: was there a hidden meaning? Did she see anything? And if so, why didn't she say anything to Hijikata and Okita?

'You heard them,' he spoke coldly and quietly. It would do no good if anybody heard him now that it appeared he was alone. 'Now get lost before they decide they need to look around seriously for once. I'll finish up on my own.'