Pre-Note: This is based off of Admiral Tigerclaw's story, Sleeping with the Girls. I don't own any part of this story other than my self-insert.


"See you, Tommy!"

I watch my brother go off in the distance with his slightly banged up car, leaving me and our parents home in our pretty nice, yet small home.

Guess it's time to pull out the old 3DS he just gave me, and play a few games.

Or play Hyperdimension Neptunia V (Which he bought me.) on the PS3. (Which he gave me.)

That's a really good game, there, and I love the fourth-wall shenanigans.

But I really need to get a job, and pay him back for all the things. Like this game.

Or sleep. I did stay up with him playing Super Smash Bros. Melee with each other.

Hah! I win with Sheik and I don't even play Sheik! Good times.

Sleep sounds good. I should do that.

/yawn

I'm too lazy to take off all the things I have on, and I never change in pajama, anyway, so I just walk over to Tommy's bed and…

I'm actually going to sleep? Must be a Christmas mira-

Load up the PS3 that's right next to said bed. Looks like I'm playing Neptunia anyway. I'm never too tired for video games until I fall unconscious or just can't aim!

Damn it.


Cold.

Fucking cold!

Why is it so fucking cold?!

I open my eyes and note my position: In the air, falling from the sky.

Oh. Shit.

Oh, chlorophyll.

Alright. First things first. Scream for help even though there's absolutely no possible chance for it to happen.

"HELP! I'M FALLING AND CAN'T GET BACK UP!"

Meh. Close enough.

Seriously, I just said that? Of all things to scream while falling to my doom?!

"I DON'T WANT TO DIE! I HAVE THINGS TO DO LIKE GET A JOB OR SOMETHING!"

I mean, I want to pay back Tommy for all the things he got me, and beat all the games I have, and-

What is WITH my priorities?!

I continue falling, screaming out things I'd rather do other than falling.


Rainbow Dash had her good days and bad days, just like everypony else. Getting blown off by the Wonderbolts and trying to deal with the avalanche of animals that Fluttershy somehow unleashed was definitely considered a bad day. 'Best Night Ever' my-

"HELP! I'M FALLING AND CAN'T GET BACK UP!"

A very loud scream of terror shook her out of her thoughts. Who said that? Was somepony in her house?

"I DON'T WANT TO DIE! I HAVE THINGS TO DO LIKE GET A JOB OR SOMETHING!"

That sounded like it came from below! He needs help!

"WHY AM I FALLING HOW DID I EVEN GET HERE?!"

She rushed out of her home, and jumped off, using her wings to guide her to the-

"THIS IS THE WORST WAKING SPOT IN THE HISTORY OF THINGS THAT I DON'T KNOW!"

Looks like a minotaur with clothes?

Oh, nevermind that! Answers later, save now!

She quickly dives out of her house, and catches up to the falling….thing. An easy catch from an angle, and done.

Not even a single injury. Score!


Well, I expected a very rough landing, yet it feels that instead of landing and becoming a very large splat on the ground, I'm still alive and being carried in flight.

Math Fact: You were falling at an estimated speed of 20 m/s and the ground looked like a zooming image. I'd say you had around 3 more seconds before a BAD END.

I guess screaming for help actually did something. So, what sav-

Brain. Reboot. Now.

Reboot in progress.

13%

67%

100%. Reboot success.

Image reloaded. No alteration in image aside from the moving background.

So. I got saved by Rainbow Dash?

And this definitely doesn't feel like a dream.

I remember the times I wished I was in Equestria. A little later afterwards, I remembered that Cutie Mark Failure Insanity Syndrome is possibly a thing, and that everypony in Ponyville sans the other Mane 6 was basically mind-raped because one Twilight Sparkle was worried about missing a weekly report.

That killed that want rather quickly, eh?

So. Equestria.

How'd I get here, anyway?

Great question.

Actually, nevermind how I got here. She's still carrying me. Where am I being taken now?

Well, we're akin to something Rainbow Dash has never seen, right? Therefore, Fluttershy for creature identification, or Twilight Sparkle, for general egghead stuff.

I bet Twilight. / I bet Fluttershy.

You're on. / You're on.


*flap*

Ponyville was in view.

*flap*

Seeing Ponyville yourself is quite a sight. You see these stores, decorated over the top, in ways you would only see in carnivals and the like. There's Sugarcube Corner, blatantly recognizable, and there's Rarity's place. Carnival Boutique? Pretty sure that's the wrong name.

And there's the library. What was it called again? Golden Oaks Library?

*flap*

Hah! I win. It's Twilight!

There was an equal chance it would be Fluttershy, you know.

*flap*

And she's still carrying me.

*flap*

"Uh. You can let me down now. I'm pretty sure I can walk and find my way." I say politely.

*flap*

"You can talk?"

"Yes! We speak the same language! I kept expecting some different dialect, making it a pain to communicate. What's the name of the language anyway?"

*flap*

"Equuish."

"English. Hehe. This is going to have a lot of bad puns."

*flap*

"So, can I walk now? I want to go to that library. For research. And puns."

"Egghead."

"Bah. I read because every story is a universe. I wonder if I can find a reference to my world in yours. I certainly found yours in mine."

She stops to land, allowing me to get on my feet.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I'd explain it to you when we get there."

And then we start walking. Or more accurately, I start walking, and she flies again.

*flap*

I'm definitely jealous. I would love flying. Then again, I would love magic. Or pretty much anything that's not normal ground-pounding. I hate walking.

And doctors, and lawyers, and cops. Hehe.

The walk was completely uneventful, surprisingly. I spent the time walking to check my inventory.

I was wearing my grey jacket (it looks like leather, but I still have no idea what it's made of.), blue jeans, my Minecraft Creeper shirt (Do I Creep You Out?), was wearing mismatched fingerless gloves, and was wearing my old digital watch on my left hand, and the new analog watch I got from Christmas on my right. In my pockets, there was my iPod (I forgot to take it out and plug it into my computer, so it was about half battery life), two cellphone batteries, a harmonica, a pen, and some very non-working earphones. On my belt, there was my old metal zip-chain, originally a keychain, but the chain broke so it only extended about a foot.

What can I say, my jacket holds everything, and I fall asleep with my jacket. And I keep forgetting I even have the metal zip-chain sometimes.

Other ponies stared at me while we walked down the road, yet there wasn't panic, or anything really.

The panic would have more preferable to the staring, me thinks. It's just unnerving, like a man walking to his executioner.

...Great job, now you're even MORE nervous.

"Alright. This complete silence in a busy street is just making me angsty. Then again, I really can't deal with pure silence that well. I expected a certain pink pony to have popped out already, actually."

"She's working almost all today at the Cakes. Wait. You know about Pinkie Pie?"

"Yeah. I'm actually pretty worried about how I'm going to react to surprises like that. At home, I could literally count down the seconds to events that were going to happen. Even if things were pretty chaotic in the household, it was ordered chaos. For example, my dad getting home, approximately 16 seconds after he walks through the door, he tells me to take out the dog. 13 seconds afterwards, he turns on the TV, and gets ready to nap off because of the general obliviousness of people at his work really annoys him. About 1 hour after I get back in the house, he tells me to cook dinner. If he doesn't, that means either it's ordered, or Mom's bringing home dinner."

I continue on, completely oblivious to the fact that my ADHD is kicking in, and I'm starting to say anything that comes to mind.

"Pinkie Pie is Pinkie Pie. There is no way in my nine hells, or your Tartarus that I can predict her at this time. To steal a term from a game series I like, she's Chaotic Good, with emphasis on Chaotic."

"Speaking of Chaotic Good, what was the last event that happened here? Ponyville itself gets hit with a lot of things, so, I'm curious."

She stares at me, wondering what I'll spout next.

I'm wondering that too, you're spouting more information than you should.

"The Grand Galloping Gala was yesterday, if that's what you mean." she allows.

A little half-smile forms on my lips.

"I'm torn between glad I avoided that, and sad that I couldn't have changed the events to improve what happened."

A questioning glance from her prompts me to give a full response.

"The free catering would have screwed Applejack, the animals are even more sheltered than Fluttershy, Celestia herself would have been plenty busy dealing with the guests and wouldn't have been able to talk with Twilight, Blueblood is the embodiment of narcissism, as far as I'm aware, Pinkie Pie didn't know the type of party, and the Wonderbolts most probably hate being put there being shoved with a bunch of rich people wanting to hobnob with them."

Hehe. Hobnob. Hobnob, hobnob, hobnob. Fun word.

"How do you-"

"Improvements could have happened with a bit of research, actually. While Applejack couldn't have sold her normal meals, she could have prepared some 'fancy limited edition' version of her food so that people would buy it. Things are bought because gimmicks. Probably something like apple pies shaped like an apple or a gold coin. If Fluttershy tried talking to the gardener in the Royal Gardens, then her disaster might have been avoided. The gardener must have been aware of how skittish the animals there were. Twilight's…."

Huh. I'd think something would come to mind.

"I got nothing, since Celestia is going to be introducing the guests no matter what. It'll probably been sometime afterwards that she'd get a chance to talk with Celestia. Rarity might not have been able to meet with her dream prince, but she could have had a chance to talk with the upper Canterlot nobles. Pinkie Pie just didn't know what sort of party it was."

I point at her.

"And for you, the Wonderbolts would have been pretty unresponsive for a lot of things. They would have hated the event about as much as you did, since it's stuffy politics instead of stunt flight. I guess you initiating a conversation on flying techniques would have been the best bet, if you don't accidentally go fangirl. It'll probably have net you a free ticket to a Wonderbolts show, or an invitation to the Wonderbolts Academy or something."

She stops flying, lands on the ground with an audible clop and I notice we're at the library door.

...That is one very small door.

For once in your life, you're tall.

It's at my chest level!

*knock knock*

Alright, now time to talk to the purple-

The door opens with a push from a familiar claw.

Oh yeah. Purple dragon. Spike, the number one assistant.

"Hey Twilight! Rainbow Dash is here with-"

Spike stops and looks at me.

"Huh."

I smile and wave.

"Hi, I'm a stranger. Can I come in?"


"I remember reading somebody's theory that every single story of fiction that's actually possible to happen is a different universe, like if you took a left step out of bed instead of a right. You don't go frontflip suddenly into the wall, instead, because that's just impossible at the moment." I say.

*snerk*

Shut up, jumping out of bed is perfectly good idea sometimes. And it was a good dream.

"There's a TV show in my universe called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, about the slice of life and adventures of six close friends. Actually, your entire culture is somewhat related to mine. The Wonderbolts are very similar to the Blue Angels, Manhattan and Manehatten, stuff like that. Even one of our favorite stories is in your universe - Indiana Jones and Daring Do."

"So, you're saying that our universe is one of many?" Twilight questions.

I note Rainbow Dash sleeping on a little beanie bag in the corner. I loved those things in the library. They're awesome to sleep on. All I get is this wooden stool. I hate stools, I always fall out of them if I'm not careful.

"Yeah. From Ace Attorney to Familiar of Zero. I'm kind of glad of all universes it was the Friendship is Magic-verse instead of somewhere dangerous, like the original My Little Pony."

She threw a slight glare at me, most likely thinking of Nightmare Moon, that Hydra, or whatever villains she had to put down with the rest of the Mane 6.

"You have your villains and monsters, yes, but the original My Little Pony had basically possible genocidal events happening literally every other week, from what I understand. Of all the universes that are the most dangerous, it's the little girl's TV show. Villains are almost only beaten with the combined response of luck and a random artefact. At least Friendship is Magic has random artefacts and actual skill with their abilities, as well as limitations on said artefacts to avoid evil uses and the knowledge that it's a last resort, and only as a last resort."

"Speaking of the Elements of Harmony, how do you think you're attuned to it? I mean, obviously by displaying the trait of each Element, but do you think it's soulbound, to-those-who-are-worthy types, or what? I mean, you were probably attuned to it before you met your friends."

I get up and start pacing.

"Dash's Sonic Rainboom may be her Loyalty element empowering her to give her the ability, seeing that the only times she's used it was when she was loyal to another. Pinkie Pie's Pinkie Sense may be her Laughter element, since harm isn't funny. Fluttershy's Stare makes me think of the phrase, 'Cruel to be kind.', and your magic is probably empowered by your friendship with Cadence, your brother and Spike, before meeting the others. I don't know how to connect Rarity's Element though, and I don't have any access to the Elements of Harmony directly so this is completely a theory I made up off my head."

"Some things may also be different from what I know." I noted and pointed out to Rainbow Dash. Or more accurately, what Rainbow Dash was sleeping on.

"The library was never shown with one of those beanie bags in the show. It being there indicates children who frequent the library to read, which was never shown in my version of your universe. I'd probably have never noticed that, if I didn't frequent the library myself when I was younger. Those things are comfy."

"So, this is what you call an alternative universe?"

I actually expected less logical thinking from Twilight and more freaking out. Silly me. Although, she's probably taking the theory I have too.

Everything is fake, everything is real. There's no actual starting point, just interconnecting lines. It's pretty fun to think about.

"It was already known it was an alternative universe. How else can I be here without that happening? Plus, the Grand Galloping Gala happened yesterday. From my perspective, that's the Season 1 Finale. We're at Season 4. Although, this also could be a universe based off some fanfiction."

"Fan-fiction?"

"Yeah. Some popular stories give questions that make you think, 'What if this happened instead of this?'. Like, what if you were researching a new version of a teleport spell, and it brought you to a new world via a magical overload or something? What if the Sonic Rainboom didn't happen? What if another universe was crossed over to yours, like Sonic the Hedgehog, or Halo, or ours? There was also the question of, what if Nightmare Moon won, but that's already known. Everybody dies due to the combined cold of eternal night, as well as the lack of sunlight providing nutrients for plants and animals. And just about all of these are explored by the fans of each story. Although, the most popular story was a self insert, 'what if a human was brought into Equ-."

I facepalmed. She giggled at that. I think she got the joke too.

To be fair, you set up your own trap there. Self-insert indeed.

"So, technically, I may or may not know your future. Your universe is an alternative universe from the original story I know, it's already proven different from the universe I know due to my existence in your world. Especially since I'm interacting with you in particular. You're the Element of Magic, you're Celestia's protege, you helped saved Luna with the other girls, and you're the-"

I cut myself off before I could say Princess of Friendship. Because that's a spoiler, and I'm trying NOT to spoil events that could spiral off and doom the world. After all, what if knowing she might become a princess stops her from becoming a princess? I hear my back crack as I look back at the beanie bag that Rainbow Dash was sleeping on.

"Do you have a spare one of those? Seriously, those are comfy."


Turns out she did. I went ahead and laid down on it, getting comfortable, while I read one of the library's many books. Well, the first thing I should read is history, right? What were the things that happened in the past? Did ponies ever have wars? What were their tactics? Were said wars replaced with something else, like World Party II, as done by Doctor Whooves Adventures? And what exactly were these beanie bags made of?

My book of choice was 'Practical Magic: A Revised Edition'. Which probably wasn't very helpful to answer the questions I had, but I had a fucking book on magic.

Screw your logic, I had a magic book.

My stomach grumbled, but I ignored it. This is Equestria, and I'll deal with hunger problems tomorrow. I'm going to be eating a lot of apples soon.

Just realized, I'd probably be reading this to sleep. Well, it's not like I'd be going anywhere. I want to finish this entire library, just like Elementary School.

And hopefully be able to talk to Celestia on events from the future, since she probably planned it. Or talk about magic and research with Twilight.

Oh damn. It's too dark to read anyway. I'll just hold it while I sleep.

'Twilight Sparkle's ascension into an alicorn, did you plan this?'

'Why yes I did. With my sister's return, politics come in and complain about a lot of things. Twilight's ascension allows for her to take some much needed weight off her back, so that she can learn and get into the swing of things. And Twilight can take the extra workload.'

'Uh. How about Dis-'

Discord.

/awake

I bolt upright. I've completely forgotten about Discord. And they just finished Season 1. Season 2's Opening was Discord. Oh damnation. I want my mind good and properly re-

Wait a second.

"Where the hell am I now?!"

Fancy windows, red and golden griffin decorations, and definitely not in a tree library asleep on a beanie bag. I note my hands still held Twilight's Practical Magic: A Revised Edition (unopened because I was thinking too much to read anyway), which means it wasn't in particular a dream, or I was connected to both areas. Or something that sounded rather clever but really wasn't.

I get off the bed, and start pacing again.

"I need to get back, I completely forgot about the damn reality warper." I mutter to myself out loud.

Dictating things out loud always helped my thinking. Let's try it.

"Alright. Time to state what I know. I popped into My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. I fell out of the sky. First issue. Where was my entry point?"

I thought about where I was. I was right under Rainbow Dash's house, and the clouds were cold as hell to fall through.

"Alright, that answer's not going to come easy. I could have came from above or inside her house. Alright. How did I get there?"

Getting to Equestria, I have no idea. Getting here? That one seems a bit easy. Obviously, I was in Twilight's home. Perhaps a misspelled Teleport that ricocheted off the walls and hit me?

"So, first answer to getting there, no idea. Getting here? Most likely answer, Twilight accidentally a teleport spell. Joy."

"And the last question necessary. Where am I?"

I look aro-

I was in a girl's dormitory. Pacing in the very center of said dormitory. I guessed as much, because they're all girls. Human girls. Definitely not ponies anymore. And there was the same uniform everywhere. Ergo, in a school.

Also, they were staring at me, wondering how the hell I got here.

"Oh. Revisit question two. How the fuck did I get here?"

Because we sure as hell don't know.


OMAKE: This is a dream, right? Nah, this is gravity.

Damn, it's cold.

What's causing it?

Wind?

Oh, hey. We're falling.

Well, this is an odd dream. I don't think I've ever had a dream where I'm falling from the sky. I mean, ever since I accidentally came across My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, it's been ponies, ponies, ponies.

You even have an inside voice based off your favorite pony. Good for you.

God damn, this feels just like the real thing. I look downwards, and-

Is that a mailbox? On top of a hill with nobody near it?

That looks familiar. Why does it look so familiar?

Uh. What? Am I landing in private property or something?

I dunno, probably.

Well, I wonder if this dream gives me a location from where I fell from?

Well, why not?

I turn in midair and-

That's a cloud house. A pretty damn large house. Made of clouds.

Hey, look! Rainbow Dash's house! Explains the familiar feeling.

Looks like ponies again, I guess.

I blame all the times we fell asleep reading fanfiction.

Well, I guess it's time to land.

This looks like it's going to hurt.

I hope this doesn't hu-

Wait a tic, this is re-

*WHUMP!*


Rainbow Dash had her good days and bad days, just like everypony else. Getting blown off by the Wonderbolts and trying to deal with the avalanche of animals was definitely considered a bad day. 'Best Night Ever' my-

*WHUMP!*

What was that? It sounds like something landed hard, like her practicing her Sonic Rainboom.

*yawn*

Well, time to go look outside.

With the speed of her future pet, she gets off her very comfortable cloud bed, and look under her house.

And vomits.

Under her house was a splatter of what used to be a human male falling from her house at the altitude of 214 fetlocks*.

BAD END


*fetlocks - ponyism for foot measurement

Author's Note: Yes, I actually do fall asleep with all those items in my jacket pockets, and yes, I fall asleep with my jacket on. The metal chain is also something I fall asleep with it on, as well. No, I was not aware of how much stuff I had in my pockets when I fall asleep until I wrote that. Holy shit, I have a lot of things on me.