Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight
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Trigger warnings for rape/non-con, suicidal thoughts/attempts and character death in later chapters.
Story begins during Eclipse; sometime in July, after the battle with Victoria's newborn army, but before Jacob gets Edward and Bella's wedding invitation.
Day 1: The Beginning Of The End
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Leah woke up feeling very… strange. She wasn't angry, which was how she usually woke up feeling, but she just couldn't put her finger on what was wrong. She stayed in bed for a few minutes, trying to figure it out, but soon gave up, and just laid there. She tried to go back to sleep, but it soon became obvious that it wasn't going to happen. With the great sigh, she rolled out of bed, and reluctantly went about her day.
At 20 years old, Leah had already graduated high school and had become accustomed to taking her time in the mornings. Of course, that was before she had gotten a job. Leah looked at the clock with a heavy sigh, and thought about not going, but she couldn't get fired from another job, she couldn't afford it. Like, literally, she couldn't afford it. The empty pickle jar she was using as a makeshift piggy bank was starting to look depressingly empty. If she ever wanted to get out of the hell-hole known as La Push, and she definitely did, then she needed all the cash she could get her hands on.
Leah grabbed her clothes and headed towards the bathroom, encountering Seth in hallway. She offered her usual grunt by way of greeting, 8:30 in the morning was too early for Seth to have a grasp on the English language, but instead of grunting back, he stopped in his tracks, causing Leah to bump into him.
"God dammit, Seth!" Leah fumbled with her clothes, finally catching them before they fell to the floor. "What gives?" Seth ignored her, and leaned forward, inhaling. His eyebrows knitted together, and he began circling her slowly, still sniffing.
Leah stood still, confused as to what the hell her little brother was doing, before she got tired of waiting for an explanation and grabbed him by his shoulders.
"Seth, what the hell is wrong with you?"
He looked up at her slowly. "You smell."
Leah raised an eyebrow, then leaned to sniff her armpit. She hadn't showered yet, but she didn't think she smelled that bad.
"No," Seth laughed, "I meant you smell different."
"I do? Different how?"
Seth shrugged. "I don't know, just… different."
"Right… Well, me and my different smelling self have to go shower before I'm late for work. Again" She walked passed him and to the bathroom. She turned the shower to its hottest setting, which wasn't nearly hot enough, and hopped in. She sighed as the water ran over her short-cropped hair and over her body. She loved her morning shower. It was peaceful, relaxing.
Leah lathered her body with soap, starting with her arms, then moving across her chest. The second the netted material of shower poof touched her nipples, she was hit with a wave of pleasure that was nearly strong enough to bring her to her knees.
She grabbed at the old people safety bar her father had put in a few years ago, silently regretting making fun of for it back then, as she caught her breath and wondered what the hell was going on. She figured that it must have been because she had gotten laid in a while, nothing more than that. Then she started thinking about when the last time was, and more specifically, who the last time was with. Sam, in his bed, the day before Emily showed up to ruin her life.
This memory didn't trigger anger, like it's usually did whenever she thought about it in a moment of weakness. Instead, it triggered lust. Lots and lots of lust. She thought of the way Sam's brand new wolf muscles glistened with sweat as he pounded into her over and over again, and she started to feel a wetness between her legs that wasn't from the shower.
Leah suddenly had the urge to touch herself, an urge she hadn't had since she phased 4 months ago, and it only seemed to get stronger the longer she wasn't doing it. Despite the fact that she had braced herself, it didn't stop her from being terribly unprepared for the feeling, and crying out from the sheer force of it. A knock on the door brought her out of… whatever was happening, and she couldn't decide if she was relieved or disappointed.
"Leah?" Sue Clearwater called out from behind the door. "What's going on in there?"
"Nothing!" Leah replied quickly, "I… slipped. I'm alright, mom."
"Well hurry up, you're going to be late for work. Again."
Leah sighed, but picked up the shower poof and quickly resumed washing herself. She made sure to think of absolutely anything but sex, her ex-boyfriend, or sex with her ex-boyfriend.
It was nearing 9:30, and Leah was late for work. Again. At this point, she didn't see how rushing was going to accomplish anything, so she took her sweet time getting there. Since she wasn't rushing, she could really appreciate the beauty of the forest that was every La Push residents' backyard. She had always loved nature, there was something about the earth smells and the sounds of the woodland creatures that she found very relaxing.
And the experience was all the more calming for her, thanks to her enhanced senses. The amount of time she got to spend in the woods was one of the only redeeming qualities about transforming into a freakish, mutant dog.
She felt her serenity decrease once she got close to Jared's house. What was he doing up? They were in the midst of summer, and the pack usually slept I until at least noon. Right, she thought to herself, there was a meeting today. Most pack meetings were uneventful; just Sam telling them that weeks patrol schedule and then the pack usually hung out for a while after. Leah had taken to skipping them and having Seth pass along the her schedule. It kept her interaction with the rest of them to a bare minimum.
They made eye-contact, which Leah broke with a roll of hers, and she kept moving, intending on walking right past her pack 'brother', but instead, Jared decided to block her path with his overgrown body.
"Move," Leah said, not bothering with pleasantries.
Instead of answering, Jared leaned in and inhaled deeply. Leah was just about to hurl an insult his way, when she noticed the look in his eyes. Now, Leah has only been with one guy, but she's been on the radar of a few in her time. She recognized the look instantly, and a quick look at the tent in the younger boys cut-off shorts confirmed that yes, he was turned on. Gross.
"Leah, you smell amazing," Jared said. he started walking towards her, and she started backing up.
"Thanks, I took this thing called a shower. You try it."
Jared ignored the insult. "You know, I don't think I've ever told you how sexy I think you are."
"I don't think Kim would appreciate you saying that." Leah didn't give two shits about Kim. It was nothing personal, the girl was nice enough, Leah just disliked all imprints in general, but Jared was obsessed with the girl. Leah thought that bringing her up would stop Jared from acting like a creeper.
Jared laughed, and it wasn't a regular laugh, it was the kind of laugh that mentally unhinged people have. "What Kim doesn't know, wont hurt her."
Jared was still advancing, but she made sure her face didn't show it. "Get out of my way, Jared."
"Make me," he said with a smirk. He reached a hand out to grab her arm, causing Leah to panic, and before she knew it, Jared was on the ground, clutching his manhood in agony.
Leah didn't waste anytime stepping over him, and continuing on her way to work, much quicker than before. The trees suddenly didn't seem quite as beautiful.
"So... how have you been?"
"You mean since you asked yesterday?," Leah asked sarcastically. "Well, I got married, popped out a couple kids, and now we're all moving to Idaho. How about you swan? How have you been?"
"Um, fine. I-I've been fine."
Leah rolled her eyes before going back to her reading. When she had first found out that Bella Swan was working at Newton's Olympic Outfitters, it was almost enough for her to not take the job, but she didn't have any other options. No one on the Rez would hire her due to her infamous bad attitude, and Newton's was the only place hiring in Forks. If she didn't take the job, she would have had to drive into Port Angeles everyday, which is pretty hard to do if you don't have a car.
Leah could admit that she didn't hate her job too much, she didn't really have to do a lot since not too many people came in anyway, it was sitting next to Swan behind the cashier's counter everyday that got to her. She had this need to try and fill every silence, which, as someone who actually liked silence, annoyed Leah to no end. She used to work after school, meaning Leah was out before Swan got in, but not anymore. She was starting to hate summer break.
The bosses kid came from the stock room to harass Bella, which was mildly entertaining. Leah kept her eyes in her book, but listened in.
"Hey, Bella, how's it going?"
"Pretty good, how's everythi-"
"Great! So listen, if you didn't have anything to do later, I was thinking we could go catch a movie or something."
"Um, I don't think that's going to work out, Mike. I mean, I'm dating Edward and all..."
"O-Oh yeah, totally, so glad you two are back together by the way. But yeah I totally meant as friends."
"Well, sure, sounds like fun. Hey, maybe Angela and the gang could come too?"
"Yeah... maybe." Mike scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, blushing bright red when he caught Leah's smirking gaze, she had abandoned pretending to not care and was watching the train wreck full-on, before returning to the stock room.
Leah tried to go back to her book, but something about the exchange, other than how hilariously pathetic Mike was, got to her. She couldn't stay silent. "Why don't you just tell the kid you're not into him?"
Bella looked around the empty store, Leah hardly ever initiated conversation between them, before answering. "I've been trying, but he doesn't seem to get the hint."
"Guys like him never do. That's way you've gotta be blunt about it. To let him walk around thinking you're going to wake up one day and leave you're mind-raping leach for him is just cruel. Put the poor kid out of his misery already."
Leah wasn't talking about Mike anymore, and Bella, smart girl that she was, picked up on it. Her shoulders slumped and her voice took on a sadder quality.
"I know that, Leah. But he's my best friend, I don't want to hurt him."
"You already are. Every single day. Hurry up and rip that band-aid off already." Leah closed her book and stood from her stool. "I'm going on my break."
She walked out the back door and leaned against the wall. She took a pack of cigarets from her pocket and lit one. She had planned on quitting before she phased, but didn't see the point know, her lungs were already good as new. A sigh of pleasure escaped her as she sucked in the smoke, but she tensed when she heard footsteps approaching. She relaxed once she realized who it was.
"Why didn't you go to the meeting, Embry?" She asked, looking at the time on her phone. She glanced at the time on her phone, 11:37. The pack usually hung out at Sam and Emily's until about 2. the mooches would stick around until they ate Emily out of house and home, or Sam kicked them out. Embry was shirtless, as they all almost always were, but he was wearing a pair of swim trunks and sun glasses instead of the typical cut-offs. There was a beach towel slung over his shoulder.
"I decided to ditch today," he said as he leaned on the wall next to her. "It would be a waste of a sunny day to watch Jared and Kim dry-hump for half the day. If we didn't meet at Emily's house I'd propose that imprints be banned from pack meetings.
Leah snorted. "Life's just a bitch like that, throwing sickeningly happy couples in your face when you're forever alone." Leah was bitchy to everyone else, but she only ever let herself wallow in self pity around Embry. She didn't want anyone to know how bitter and lonely she was, but anyone with eyes could figure it out.
Leah trusted Embry, other than Seth, he was the only wolf she let in. she actually considered him a friend, had every since he told her he liked boys. She had no idea why he felt comfortable confiding in her of all people, but she was glad for it. The two had bonded over imprinting of all things. Or, the lack of imprinting rather.
The elders had told them all that the point of imprinting was so a wolf can find the best possible mate to continue their species. Since phasing made Leah barren, and two boys couldn't make butt-babies, they were both pretty much screwed in the imprinting department.
"I get that they're in love and shit, and I don't hold it against them...much, but it makes me wanna puke whenever they make out in front of me."
"That's how I feel whenever I see Sam and Emily together. Except instead of puking I wanna punch Emily in the face."
"It wasn't really her fault, you know," Embry said hesitantly, like he thought she'd punch him in the face, "Sam's either."
"Yeah, I know," she had stayed up many a night obsessing over just how not anyone's fault it all was, "knowing that doesn't make it hurt any less."
The silence lingered, more awkward than it had been between them in a while, so Leah decided to change the subject. "Hey, do I smell any different?"
Embry raised an eyebrow, but leaned over to sniff her anyway. "A little, I guess," he shrugged, "Like you switched your shampoo or something?"
Leah shook her head. "This morning Seth said I smelled 'different', but I didn't pay it too much attention since he can barely remember his own name that early, but then, when I was walking here, Jared got all creepy and started hitting on me. Saying I smelt 'Amazing'."
"Hitting on you?" Embry asked, skepticism written all over his face, "You're sure?"
"Yeah. I thought that maybe it was a prank, or one of the other idiots dared him or something, but he was dead serious."
"What about Kim? Jared would go through hell and back for that girl."
"I brought her up and he said, 'what Kim doesn't know, won't hurt her'. Now tell me that's not creepy."
"It is...," he conceded, "But still, he imprinted, why would he-"
"He was, Embry" Leah snapped, starting to feel a little offended. "Just because it's been a while, doesn't mean I can't tell when a guy wants me."
"Okay, okay, I believe you. So, what happened after you told him to fuck off?"
"I kicked him in the balls."
Embry's mouth fell open, then he closed it with a snap and a shake of his head, as if he should have known she would do that in the first place. "Well, maybe you should talk to the elders about it."
Leah snorted, "What, so they can poke and prod at me like a fucking frog in biology class? Hell no, I'm not their science experiment." She silently fumed while ignoring Embry's eyes on her. After a moment, she sighed and met his gaze.
"Look, I get why you hate it, I would to, but you're the first female wolf in our tribe's history. They have to figure shit out with you, so you kinda are an experiment. You should be proud."
"Of what?" Leah asked with a snort, "what the fuck am I supposed to be proud about?"
"By going through this, any future she-wolves we get won't have to. You're paving the way for them, and that's what you should be proud about."
Leah frowned. She had never thought of it that way. She had started planning on ditching La Push ever since Sam and Emily happened, and her resolve had only gotten stronger when she phased. She didn't care who'd get left behind, who'd end up needing her.
"I'll talk to them," she said, more to herself than Embry, "Right after my shift is over."
"Cool." Embry said hiding his smile so she wouldn't snap at him again. "Hey when is you're break supposed to be over?"
Leah checked her phone. "Ten minutes ago. Fuck, I gotta go, see ya. "
"Later," Embry laughed, watching her leave, cursing all the way back into the store.
Leah closed her front door with a sigh of relief. Another 9 to 5 done. She kicked her shoes off at the bottom of the stairs, then headed up. She fully intended on curling up in her bed and getting to sleep before having to do it all over again, but an impatient clearing of an old, raspy throat stopped her. She looked over her shoulder to see Billy and Old Quil sitting on her couch staring at her.
With a heavy sigh she turned and plopped down in her, formerly her father's, old recliner. She immediately regretted sending Quil a text to have his grandpa arrange an elder meeting, she was really not in the mood for them. The three sat in awkward silence, on Leah's part anyway, until Sue came in with two glasses of lemonade for her 'guests'. Personally, Leah thought the two had been there enough times to walk... and roll, their asses to the kitchen and get a drink themselves.
"So, Leah, what seems to be the problem?" Sue asked as she sat down.
Leah faltered a bit, still not used to how quickly her mother could switch into pack elder mode. "So, this morning I didn't feel right when I woke up. I don't know what was wrong exactly, but it wasn't right. Then Seth's all 'you smell different, not bad, just different.'"
She paused a second, wondering if she should bring up Jared, then decided against it. "Then on my break at work, I saw Embry, and he said the same thing. He said I should talk to you guys about it, so here we are."
After confirming, twice, that no, she hasn't changed shampoos, they reached a conclusion, no one had a clue what the fuck was happening. Leah was just about to say, 'well, thanks for nothing', before Old Quil spoke.
"Girl, if there's anything, anything at all, you're keeping to yourself, speak now."
Leah hesitated, she didn't want to tell them about Jared because, for one, she was embarrassed at how much the incident got to her, and also, she had a feeling they wouldn't believe her like Embry hadn't.
"When I was walking to work," She said with her head down, "I saw Jared. He sorta, well he definitely... hit on me. At first I thought it was some stupid joke, but he was serious. He kept saying how good I smelled. The look in his eyes though, it scared me."
She felt so weak admitting it to them. Leah despised feeling weak.
"I threatened to tell Kim, and he just brushed it off, as if he wasn't nauseatingly in love with her. He wouldn't let me pass, so I kicked him in the balls and left. That's all."
Her mom and Billy looked disbelieving, she knew they would, but Old Quil's already hard look intensified.
"Have been feeling more aroused than usual?" All eyes snapped to him like he had grown a second head. "Honestly people, I wouldn't have asked if it wasn't important. Well, have you then?"
Leah raised an eyebrow, but bit back a 'perverted old man' comment. "it's none of your business, but yeah. This morning in the shower." She ignored her mother's look of realization. "Now what the hell does that have to do with anything?"
"I means that you're not too far along in your heat cycle yet. Now we can prepare."
The room was silent as everyone processed what was said. Billy was the first to speak. "Heat cycle? I didn't think that was possible."
The old man rolled his eyes. "You are the chief of a reservation that's home to a pack of werewolves that kill vampires. Anything is possible."
"But there's no record of this," Sue said, "I've read through all the archives and haven't seen-"
"There was no record of a female shifter until 4 months ago either. We've reached uncharted territory here people, try to keep up."
"Wait a minute," Leah said, speaking slowly, "what you're trying to tell me is that I'm in heat? Like a fucking dog?"
"No, of course not," Old Quil said with another roll of his eyes, "You're in heat like a fucking wolf."
Leah lunged for the man, fully prepared to snap his weak little neck like a twig for mocking her, but luckily for him, Seth walked through the door at exactly that moment and held her back. "What's going on Lee? Why are you trying to kill Quil's grandpa?"
Leah brushed him off and began pacing the floor. It's what she did to calm herself down so she wouldn't phase. It worked most of the time. "So what, I'm gonna be extra horny for a while? That all?" she absently heard Seth mumble 'gross', under his breath and leave the house just as quickly as he came.
"That's the gist of it, yes. Although, I don't know for certain, based on the symptoms you're displaying, it'd be my best guess."
The fact that all they had to go on was a guess depressed her deeply. Leah Clearwater was basically a walking, shit-talking science experiment.
"Well, isn't this just fucking great!" She went back to pacing the floor, talking more to herself than the others. "I was just starting to get used to this wolf crap, just starting to think everything would be alright, and BAM! The universe has to throw a fucking monkey wrench in the plans."
The room was silent as Leah fumed. Old Quil patiently waited for her to calm enough for him to speak. "Look, girl, I know that you never wanted this, and I realize that it's very hard on you, but this is the hand you've been dealt in life. You can either play it, or fold. I never pegged you as a quitter, was I wrong?"
Leah always did respond positively to directness, and it got through to her this time as well. She sat back down in her recliner and motioned for Old Quil to continue.
"A female wolf's heat cycle lasts, approximately, 21 days. We'll assume this is day one. Your scent has become appealing to your pack mates, and the attraction will become stronger as time goes on. This applies to all your pack mates, regardless of their imprints, the exception being your brother."
Leah and sue released twin sighs of relief. They had enough going on without the added risk of incest.
"But what of Embry?" Billy asked, "Leah said he reacted to her scent in the same way Seth did."
"Well," the old man said, pausing to take a long sip of his lemonade, "I have two theories on that. Either Embry is Harry's illegitimate son, or-"
"He is not," Sue said with a bite in her tone and a fire in her eyes that Leah hadn't seen since her father passed.
Though the subject was taboo, everyone in La Push knew that Tiffany Call claimed to not know who her son's father was, but those in on the werewolf secret knew that, since Embry was able to phase, his father had to have been either Sam's, Quil's, Jacob's or Leah and Seth's fathers.
"I can't speak for anyone else's husband," Sue continued, with a pointed look at Billy, which he met with one of his own, "But mine would have never cheated on me." and just like that, the fire was gone, and Sue was back to the pleasantly vacant woman she was before.
Old Quil placed a hand on Sue's thigh. "I'm not saying he did, Sue, I was just throwing the option out there. Option two is that he's gay. If the boy has no interest in women, then neither will his wolf."
They all looked at Leah, knowing that her and Embry were close, for an answer. "I don't see how that's any of your business," she said defensively, which pretty much gave them their answer. Fuck. She would have to warn Embry and apologize before this came out, no pun intended.
"Well, that's settled," Old Quil said dismissively, though Leah could tell how much he couldn't wait to tell his poker buddies all about it. The old man gossiped like a school girl, it a miracle he hasn't blabbed about the pack to the whole reservation.
"As a female wolf, the males, excluding Seth and Embry, will want to mate with you. The alpha male has first pick of the females, or female in this case, so..."
He drifted off to let Leah fill in the blanks, and her heart sank when she did. She was finally over Sam, well, she over wanting to be with Sam, the bitter feeling of rejection had yet to fade, and now she was expected to mate with him? Wasn't being stuck in his pack and having his disgusting thoughts about Emily in her head enough?
"So I have to... mate, with him whether I want to or not? Isn't that called rape?"
Old Quil shook his head. "The longer you are in heat the more aroused you will feel, and the more your scent will affect your pack mates. Your inner wolf will need to mate, and her needs will cloud your judgment. Your wolf will seek out, and only accept the strongest male in the pack to breed with her, and Sam will be more than happy to oblige."
Leah's heart stopped at the word 'breed', but before she could question it, Billy spoke.
"You're forgetting something, Quil, Sam isn't the true alpha, Jacob is. If Sam tries to claim Leah, Jacob will challenge him, and if Jacob challenges him-"
"Sam will lose," Leah finished for him. The first thought she had was that she'd much rather be claimed by Jake than Sam. The second thought was how stupid the first was, because no one owned Leah Clearwater. "So, what now? What the hell am I supposed to do now?"
The three looked at each other, before silently agreeing that Sue should take the lead. "Well, sweetheart, you can either accept this and go find Jacob right now. He'll take over as alpha, and stake his claim to the rest of the pack. Or, you can try to avoid the other wolves for the next 21 days. And if you manage it, you'll have to do it again the next time you go into heat. The choice is yours, and we'll support you no matter what."
Leah thought hard. Realistically, submitting to Jake would be the best option. The reservation was only so big, she was bound to run into one of the pack eventually. And even if she did manage to avoid them, how many heat cycles could she make it through before her luck ran out? But her heart was telling her to fight this shitty situation with everything she had. Leah's made it 20 years without being a quitter, she'd be damned if she started now.
"I'm not gonna be claimed by anyone because I don't want to. I don't give a rat's ass what my inner wolf wants or needs because it's not the one in control here, I am. I'm not an animal, even if I am forced to turn into one."
Leah turned and walked upstairs to her bedroom, slamming her door when she got there. She shoved her headphones into her ears to drown out the voices talking about her behind her back. She thought about calling Embry, but decided against it. She'd see him tomorrow. She thought about packing a bag and going... anywhere else, but knew that the 300 bucks in her pickle jar wouldn't last her 3 days with the amount of food she ate.
She decided to go to bed early, and deal with this shit-storm in the morning. "21 days, Leah," she told her self, "you just have to last 21 days." As she started to drift asleep, she hoped, for what felt like the millionth time in 4 months, that she didn't wake up.
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So that's the first chapter! This story has been sitting on my laptop for years now, but I'm finally confident in where it's going and the amount of chapters I have have ready to go to post it.
Please feel free to tell me what you think.
