This is my gift to the amazing curlysviola! I made it for Zosan Secret Valentine's! I couldn't think of an idea so I kinda stole my idea from the actual name because I really suck… Oops? I hope you all enjoy this, and sorry if it's crap. This is my first time writing anything close to a fanfic in a few years. Sorry for any OOCness! I tried! It's rated M for language, curtsey of Zoro and Sanji. Thank you aerle for being the beta!


Valentine's Day is supposed to be a day where a person gives a gift filled with love to the person that they fancy. People give away chocolates, cakes, cards, frilly pink hearts, and all things in between. It is a day where people find new love, celebrate current relationships, or even get rejected by the person of their dreams. It's also a day where people sit back and bitterly watch all the happy couples walking around hand in hand, wishing to be like them, or wishing every happy person an untimely demise. But this year, Valentine's Day is a little different for a certain man.

Sanji was a man that absolutely loved love. He dreamed about it, had fantasies about finding his one and only, how they would meet and fall instantly in love and live happily ever after. And what better day for that than Valentine's Day?

He had been looking forward to this day all year long, brain storming what he could make for Nami and Robin. Of course he would put all his love and affection for both ladies into what he would make for them, and he would spend all his time and effort into making the gifts just perfect for both of their tastes. That way, they would definitely fall in love with him. Every year he made plans for this specific day and every year he failed to make them love him, but that didn't dampen his determination.

Sanji loved both Robin and Nami so much, and he would never refuse a request from either of them. Which is why he found himself in the galley of the Sunny, slaving over the stove and making chocolates for the Marimo. Yes, that's right. He was making Valentine's chocolates for Roronoa fucking Zoro.

It all started about a week ago. Nami had come up with something that he honestly couldn't say that he's too happy with.


Everyone was enjoying a nice, sunny day on the calm waters of the Grand Line. They were sailing towards the next island and were expecting to reach it within a few hours. So it wasn't odd when Nami called a meeting after lunch and demanded that everyone be present. Of course everyone went, not wanting to face the wrath of the navigator.

Sanji sat down after he finished serving drinks to everyone. He had made sure to make them based on their personal tastes. He watched his lovely Nami-swan as she started talking about who would do what when they reached the island.

"Zoro, you'll stay back and watch the ship. If I catch you napping, I will increase your debt by ten million belis." Nami said, crossing her arms.

"Whatever." Zoro leant back and was getting ready to take a nap.

"I mean it, Zoro!" Nami warned, glaring at the swordsman.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah..." He said, slowly slipping into his pre-nap state of meditation.

Before Sanji could back Nami up, she got back to telling everyone where they would be going. Sanji was of course in charge of getting the food, Chopper was to go with Robin and get any medical supplies that he needed to stock up on, and everyone else was to go do what they wanted. She had made sure to put Usopp and Luffy into the same group in hopes of keeping the Captain in line.

"Now that we have that settled, I have something else I want to talk about." Nami said and smiled happily.

"Oh! Is it about meat?" Luffy asked, salivating at just the thought of all the meat he could be eating right now.

"No Luffy, it's not about meat." She responded and rolled her eyes, "So you all know that Valentine's Day is coming up right?"

Sanji shot up, hearts forming in his eyes. "Does this mean you're finally admitting your love to me, my beloved Nami-swan!?" He started to swoon happily, thoughts of what they were going to do together swirling in his head.

The navigator let out an annoyed sigh and rolled her eyes. "No, Sanji-kun. Anyways, I was thinking we should do a Secret Valentine."

Zoro let out a snort and opened one of his eyes. "That sounds like a stupid idea." He said and closed it again. "I'm not doing it."

"I think it sounds interesting, navigator-san." Robin smiled mysteriously.

"I think it's a super idea." Franky said, taking a large swig of his cola.

Sanji just about had a heart attack at that. He would be able to give a gift to one of his beloved ladies for sure! "That's a perfect idea, Nami-swan!" He swooned once more.

"What's that?" Chopper asked, looking up at Nami with wide and curious eyes.

"It's when you're given the name of someone on the crew and you give them a Valentine. They won't know you will be giving them a gift until you actually give it to them." Nami explained.

Usopp grinned. "I invented it." He said to Chopper.

"Really!?" Chopper and Luffy asked in unison.

"Sugoi!" Luffy yelled, eyes filled with wonder.

"Yohohoho! That sounds interesting, Nami-san, may I see your panties?" Brook asked politely, taking a sip of his tea.

Sanji kicked Brook. "Stop that!" He yelled angrily.

Nami ignored all that was going on around her. "Everyone is going to participate, and that means you to, Zoro." She said pointedly.

Zoro snorted. "No, I'm not."

Luffy grinned. "Shishishi, I think Zoro should join. Come on it will be fun!" He said happily.

Zoro glared at Luffy. "No."

"If you don't, I'll raise your debt." Nami said, smile turning wicked.

"There is no way I'm paying you any money, you witch!" Zoro yelled, standing up.

"What did you just say to, Nami-san?" Sanji asked darkly.

"You heard me, curly-brow. I called her a witch. Are you hard of hearing?" The swordsman sneered.

Something inside Sanji snapped at that. He jumped at Zoro and kicked him in the face, sending him flying back and into the wall. "Nami-san is not a witch, you shitty marimo!" He yelled.

Zoro got up and pulled out his swords, clearly pissed. "Oh yeah, swirly-brow? I highly doubt that!" He went to swing at Sanji, but was stopped by a large mechanical hand on his arm.

"Don't fight in the galley," Franky said. "Or I'll throw you out."

"Tch... Whatever. This is stupid." Zoro said and put his swords away. He went back to the table, not before slamming his shoulder into Sanji's first.

Sanji decided to ignore that and sat back down to hear what Nami had to say. He couldn't help but look forward to this, he couldn't wait to make one of the ladies an amazing gift. Of course he would make sure to make something for both ladies, but it still made him happy.

"So this is how it's going to work." Nami said and set about explaining the rules.

Nami had decided that she was going to be the one choosing who gets who since there was an uneven amount of people in the crew. She had already chosen..

"Alright, so I'll write down who gets who and give you the slips throughout the day. This gives you all time to think of what the person would like, and to go shopping for it. I'll give you all a little more money for your allowances just this once, alright?" She asked and crossed her arms, waiting for an answer.

"I still think this is stupid..." Zoro grumbled, getting up and leaving the room.

Sanji swooned. "That's so generous of you Nami-swan!"

"I think it's a great idea," Robin said, getting up. "I wonder who I'll get."

"Whoever I get will get a SUUUUPER present!" Franky said enthusiastically, easily moving into his trademark pose.

"I hope I get chocolate covered meat!" Luffy grinned, eyes turning into images of meat.

"This is so exciting!" Chopper squealed.

"I hope I get to see some panties, though I don't have any eyes. YOHOHOHO SKULL JOKE!" Brook laughed and got up to make a song.


Later that day, Nami had gone up to Sanji with who she had wanted him to give a gift to. To his despair, it wasn't the lovely Robin-chan. It was the shitty marimo. He had asked her to reconsider, but she said no and threatened him with debt if he tried to weasel his way out of it.

That is why he was currently making these chili chocolates for the man that he hated so much. He couldn't say that he was completely unhappy, because he was still able to make amazing gifts for his lovely ladies.

Sanji had held off making the chocolates until the day itself, to avoid the risk of Luffy getting into them. He didn't have enough to make another batch because he had already made some for Nami and Robin, and there was only enough left for the marimo.

After adding the finishing touches to the chocolates, Sanji cleaned up and let them sit for a bit. He decided that it would be safe to leave them on the counter, since Luffy was off playing with Usopp and Chopper. He deemed he had enough time to go out and look at the ocean for a few minutes and still get back in before Luffy got hungry. Plus, he would be able to see if the rubber idiot tried to enter the galley.

He walked out as he lit up his cigarette, heading to the railing and leaning over it to watch the ocean pass by as they sailed closer and closer to the next island. They still had a few days until they would get there, but the waters were beautiful and clear, and the horizon showed no ships. Overall it was a perfect day. All except for the obnoxious snoring coming from just to his right.

Sanji looked over with an annoyed sigh and spotted the sleeping marimo on the floor. It annoyed him because he had been working so hard to make the stupid chocolates for the man and here he was, just sleeping away without a care in the world. It lead him to wonder who the marimo got, and what he had gotten them. Probably some cheap chocolate or some shit like that.

Just the thought of that had him pissed off. With a growl, Sanji kicked Zoro in the side. "Wake up you, shitty marimo! Stop sleeping the day away!"

With a pained grunt, Zoro got up and glared daggers at his assailant. "What the fuck was that for, you shitty cook!?" He yelled, pissed that his afternoon nap had been ruined.

"What the hell are you doing just lying there sleeping!?" Sanji yelled.

"Why the hell shouldn't I be!?" Zoro countered.

Sanji didn't respond and just aimed a kick at Zoro's head. He had been stressing over the chocolate for Zoro to make it perfect, and he didn't know why. He had decided that it was so he wouldn't let Nami-swan down and that it might make her happy if he put time and effort into his gift. So he wanted to let off steam to hide his frustration.

Zoro countered the attack and used his swords to fight the cook. Whatever the hell was wrong with him, he didn't know. It annoyed him that he couldn't even enjoy a nice relaxing nap on the deck. He put all his annoyance into the swings that he aimed at the shit cook.

As they fought, neither noticed Luffy enter the galley. It took until there was a crash for Sanji to realize his fatal mistake. He swore and pushed away from Zoro and ran into the galley. "Luffy, you better not ha-"

"SPICY!" Luffy yelled, fanning his mouth even as he was stuffing his face with Zoro's chocolates.

Sanji saw red as he watched Luffy devour his hard work. It took all his willpower not to rip his captain to shreds. "Luffy, what the hell!?"

Luffy shoved the last pieces in his mouth and swallowed them. "I was hungry!" He said happily and grinned.

Sanji was absolutely livid. "Get out of my kitchen." He hissed, holding back from attacking him.

"Okay!" Luffy chirped and ran out and to Usopp and Chopper to continue their game.

Sanji walked further into the galley to inspect the damage. Nothing was broken thankfully, but there wasn't even a crumb left of the chocolates that he had made for Zoro. He had luckily put Nami and Robin's chocolates in the fridge because they had set enough.

Groaning at his own stupidity, Sanji leaned on the counter and sighed. He didn't have anything he could make now. Even if he did have enough to make more chocolates for Zoro, he still needed the time to temper the chocolate and decorate it. He didn't want to let his dear Nami-swan down, and deep, deep, deep inside, he also didn't want to let the marimo down.

Which is why he made the stupid decision of going to Nami for help. It took him a bit to gather up the courage, but he did it no less.

"Nami-san, I need your help." He said with a small sigh.

"It will cost you." Nami said as she stood up and looked at him.

"Anything for you, my dove!" He swooned, hearts forming in his eyes.

"Alright Sanji-kun, what do you need?" She asked, pulling off her sunglasses.

Sanji had to resist looking over her body. He had gone to her while she was sunbathing so she was wearing one of her amazing swimsuits. Taking a deep breath, Sanji looked into her eyes. "Luffy ate my present to the marimo, so I need help with ideas on what to get him." He said.

Nami narrowed her eyes. "And how did that idiot get to the gift?" She asked, leaning on one foot with her hands on her hips.

"I... I went out for a smoke and ended up getting into a fight with the marimo." He said, shifting about nervously.

"You're such and idiot," Nami said with a sigh and shook her head. "Alright, give me a bit and I'll try and help you."

"Thank you Nami-swan, you're so amazing and generous!" Sanji said, about ready to hug her.

"Yeah, okay. This is going to cost you a pretty penny." She warned with a small smirk.

"I'll pay anything for you!" He said and ran off, a skip in his step.

Nami smirked and sat back down. "Good." She hummed happily and got to thinking.


Sanji was cleaning up the kitchen when Nami and Robin walked into the galley and straight for him. He looked at them with a smile. "How can I help you, my lovely ladies?" He asked.

"You still need help with your gift for Zoro right?" Nami asked, getting straight to business.

"Yes, I do." He said, voice going a little flat.

Robin smiled mysteriously. "Well we have just the answer for you."

Sanji perked up at that. "You do?" He asked.

"Yup. Just do what Robin tells you and it will be perfect, alright?"

"Anything for you!" Sanji swooned and looked at Robin with a goofy smile.

"Alright, we will head to the crow's nest when navigator-san gives me the signal." Robin informed him.

Sanji nodded and continued to clean the kitchen as Nami left. "So... What's the idea?" He asked and spared a look at Robin.

"You'll see." She said with a small giggle.

"Alright!" He said, smiling once more, continuing to clean.


Sanji followed Robin up into the crow's nest and looked around in confusion. "Why are we up here, Robin-chan?" He questioned, tilting his head a little.

"To get the gift ready for when Swordsman-san returns." Robin said and walked towards Sanji.

Sanji backed up a little, unsure as to why he was feeling so uncomfortable around the dark woman. "What is it you aren't telling me?"

"Oh, nothing important. Now stay still, Cook-san." Robin headed closer, reaching out towards Sanji.

The blond backed up a little more and turned his head just in time to see a pile of pink ribbons and a red gag. His eyes went wide and he turned back, about to try and run when he was tripped by multiple hands. "Robi-" He called, cut off by the gag.

"Hush now, Cook-san, we can't let Swordsman-san hear you just yet." Robin said and got to work.


Zoro grumbled as he followed behind Nami, headed further down into the ship. "What the hell do you want?" He asked, glaring at the woman.

"Oh, I just wanted to see if you wanted to make a bet with me." Nami said.

"Hell no, I don't need to lose any more money to you, you witch." Zoro turned into the direction that he had hoped was the crow's nest.

"So you don't want to have a drinking contest with me?" Nami asked innocently.

"What?" Zoro asked, turning around. His interest was piqued at the thought of booze.

"You heard me, I wanted to have a drinking contest. Sanji-kun was kind enough to give me some bottles from his collection in the galley. So I thought you and I could make a friendly bet." Nami said, finger placed innocently on her lip in a thoughtful manner.

"You're just trying to con me out of my money." Zoro said, even as he was walking towards her. The thought of alcohol was drawing him closer. He just couldn't say no.

"Oh, don't be a chicken," Nami said with a smirk. "At least you'll get booze out of it, no?"

"Whatever, you witch." Zoro grumbled, walking passed her and heading into the wrong room.

"Zoro, this room." She said and crossed her arms. What an idiot.

Zoro grumbled again, cheeks turning a very light shade of pink. "I knew that." Walking right into the room, he sat down and grabbed the bottle. "What are we betting on?"

"Just a few thousand belis." Nami smirked and grabbed the bottle, pulling off the cork.

Zoro nodded and started drinking.

"So what did you get for Sanji?" Nami asked, bringing the bottle to her lips.

Zoro almost choked on his alcohol, almost. He pulled it down calmly and looked into her eyes. "Cheap chocolate. Something that he's bound to hate." He said and went back to drinking.

"Cheap ass." Nami grumbled.

What Zoro didn't know, was that Nami had given Sanji his name as well. She was sick and tired of watching the two idiots dancing around each other when they clearly wanted the other. It was plain as day and getting annoying. Of course she wasn't doing it for free. Once the day was over, she was going to give them the cost of all her effort. She was going to be so rich.

Zoro didn't seem to have a care in the world as he guzzled down his much appreciated sake. The day meant nothing to him. It was just a stupid excuse to give people chocolate. Just a waste of his time.

Nami drank her alcohol and looked at the time. "Hey, let's have a rain check on this alright? I'm busy," she said and got up. "Bye."

Zoro furrowed his brow at her and put the bottle down. "Then why the hell did you challenge me to this in the first place?" He asked.

"Reasons." She said and smirked, walking out.

Zoro grumbled and finished his bottle. The witch had taken the rest with her, so he had nothing else to do but head back to his training in the crow's nest.


Sanji shifted uncomfortably in his position on the floor of the crow's nest. He had been like this for an hour now and he had almost no feeling in his legs. He tried to move his arms into a more comfortable position, but was once again met with the resistance of the surprisingly strong ribbon that bound his wrists together. Sanji grunted, glaring at the hatch that the marimo should have come through by now. The idiot was probably lost again, or worse, taking one of his stupidly long naps.

He was starting to regret his decision to ask Nami to help him, if only to spare himself the embarrassment and numbness he was feeling. The cook looked around for a possible way to escape his binds and found nothing. He sighed in defeat and slumped back. If he was lucky, Zoro would sleep the rest of the day away and Nami-swan would come up to let him go. That would be the best.

Just as he started to get happy at the thought, he heard the latch click on the hatch and he looked at it with wide eyes, just as it opened and a green head popped through. He watched, mortified as Zoro climbed in and pulled off his shirt, about to get to his workout. The shitty marimo didn't even notice him yet! He wasn't sure if he was happy or pissed off at that.

Sanji tried to move into a different position, but just then the marimo turned around and looked at him. The cook almost laughed at the look that played over that stupid face. It was horror, surprise, and... Was that lust? It couldn't be...

The blonde started to go red as Zoro kept staring at him. He shifted a little to try and cover himself more but it was no use. Robin had tied him up tight.

He was tied up from head to toe with the pink ribbon he had seen just before Robin had gotten to him. He was on his knees with his hands in the air, tied to a small hook in the wall. What was worse was that she had stripped him of all his clothes and tied him there, completely naked. She had tied a bow around his throat and... Right under the head of his leaking erection.

That's right, she had gotten him hard and tied him up like a present. She had forced the gag into his mouth to silence his protest and had decidedly kept it in there, probably thinking that it completed the look. So there he was, tied up and naked all for the marimo to see.

Sanji looked to the side in shame and waited for the laughter, the taunts, for whatever else that was to come, but it never came. He looked up at the marimo in confusion, only to be shocked at what he saw. The man was blushing furiously and trying to hide an erection of his own. He wasn't expecting that one at all. He made a sound and tried to speak but his words were cut off by the gag in his mouth. He huffed in annoyance and glared at the marimo.

Zoro walked to Sanji and pulled out the gag, looking the cook up and down. He had not been expecting this, not now and not ever. He looked the cook in the eyes. "What the hell, shit cook? Why are you... Yeah?"

"Apparently I'm your present since our idiot Captain ate the shitty chocolates that I made you." Sanji said and glared at him.

"Why the hell would you make me chocolates shit cook?" Zoro asked, now more confused.

"Because you're my secret valentine. Nami-swan gave me your name so I had to make a gift for you. When Luffy ate the first one, Nami-san came up with this and Robin-chan tied me up." The cook said.

"How the hell would I be your valentine when you're mine?" Zoro asked, not thinking about the obvious. Nami had rigged the thing so that Zoro and Sanji had to give each other gifts.

"What the hell do you think, you shitty marimo?" Sanji snapped, rolling his eyes.

"Oh that stupid witch!" Zoro yelled, eyes going wide in realization.

"Don't talk about Nami-swan that way you stupid brute!" Sanji yelled.

Zoro looked at him blankly and stuffed the gag back into his mouth. "I like you better like this. Less annoying."

Sanji let out an indignant cry that was muffled by that stupid gag. He wiggled around and glared at the man.

Zoro rolled his eyes and pulled out the gag. "What?"

"Are you just going to sit there?" Sanji asked, glaring still.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Zoro asked in confusion.

"Hurry up and open your gift!" Sanji said and rolled his eyes, cheeks going a little red.

"What gi- Oh..." Zoro said, going a nice shade of red.

Sanji couldn't help the smirk that played over his face. "Shy are we?"

"Shut up, shit cook! I'm not shy!" He yelled and gripped the back of the blonde's neck.

"Prove it." Sanji challenged.

Zoro smirked and smashed his lips to Sanji's, muffling anything else the smart ass wanted to say. He then pulled away with a smirk. "Happy Valentine's day, shit cook."

Sanji smirked back. "Happy Valentine's Day, you fucker."


So I hope you enjoyed this and that it didn't make your eyes bleed. This fic was made for the lovely curlysviola. I was pleasantly surprised that I had gotten her because she's the person who told me about the Zosan Secret Valentine and told me I should join. I wasn't going to at first but she said she was and I decided why not? I'm so happy that I did. I really hope you enjoy this dear! I tried to make it good for you! I'm sorry if it sucks… I tried to write smut for it but I failed horribly. But if you want, I can try again. So yeah, happy Valentine's Day everyone!