Twas the week before Christmas, but on the Mode floor
The employees were swinging as they've all done before.
The front desk was covered with fake plastic snow
And, once again, Betty was hidden below!
"I found you, " cried Henry with a smile of delight…
"But if you're looking for condoms, we might have to fight!"
"I'm hiding," said Betty, "Protecting myself!
From that over-sexed printer who is dressed as an elf!
The lecherous midget was under my chair,
I noticed him giggling at my Rudolph underwear!"
Henry's eyebrow shot up as he thought, "Ho-ho-ho,
Just what can I do to get that reindeer to glow…?"
But chivalry kicked in (as we all knew it would)
And he promised his princess he'd get Harvey good!
"No tiny pervert can torture my Betty!
I'll fix him up right, turn his guts to spaghetti!"
"Oh dear," Betty thought, "Now I've started a mess,
Just because one small person peeked under my dress.
Somehow I must stop him or this party will crash –
I just can't let Henry turn our printer to hash!"
So out from under the desk she did hurry
And quick, scanned the scene with a look of real worry.
For there she saw Henry, his face flushed with heat
Prepared to stomp Harvey with his size 13 feet!
"Stop!" Betty cried, "This violence must end.
In the Chrismukkah season everyone should be friends!
I'll forgive Harvey (if he says he'll behave)
After all, with his help, the last issue was saved!"
So put down that Red-Rider, give the dreidel a twirl.
Find a mistletoe branch and kiss your favorite girl.
For now, here comes Daniel in his Santa Claus robe –
Let's turn this Mode party into a life-size Snowglobe!"
