(A/N: So I read Vivi's 10-08 fic, and it was so sweet, go read it if you haven't, and I sort of got an idea for one of my own. It's spun off 4.04, a little of the fluffy side.)
"Serena, why are you not going to Lily's party tonight? And at such late notice?" Blair stood at the door of Serena's room, looking at her best friend slumped over the computer uncharacteristically.
Serena looked up, and reached for the bedside table, grasping the calendar gently. "It's the 8th today. Dan's going to be at the party tonight." Blair sighed, and sat on the corner of the bed, prompting Serena to continue.
"I know I said that if I chose Dan, a part of me would always love Nate, and vice versa, but somehow, when I don't choose either of them, I'm just missing Dan. 10-8, it's sort of our day. That story he wrote, 10-8-05, that got published in the New Yorker a couple of years back? It's actually about the first time he saw me, and I don't think I can go to the party tonight, see him there, on this day, and feel like everything's alright."
Blair looked at her friend, emotions overwhelming her, and she was reminded of old times. I don't think I'm ready yet. I still miss Dan sometimes. More than sometimes. All the time.
"Serena, if that's how you feel, you've got to tell him. He probably thinks you're just waiting to see who to choose, and we both know that's not true. Even if he doesn't believe you, it doesn't hurt to look beautiful and show him what he's missing. Come on." She hugged Serena, knowing that Dan probably wouldn't be able to resist Serena, he hadn't been able to at the party, if not for Vanessa, everything would have gone the way they had wanted it to.
As the two of them walked into the ballroom, heads turned, as always, but Serena couldn't help noticing that Dan's wasn't one of them. "Perhaps this wasn't the right thing to do, B." "Serena, we're already here. Let's go find Lily, I daresay Humphrey's probably somewhere around."
"Dan, could you… Dan?" Rufus nudged his son lightly, he was staring into space. "I'm sorry, what is it Dad?" Dan turned around quickly, wearing a sheepish expression and an apologetic smile. He looked at Serena longingly, he knew that it was five years, five long years since the first night he saw her. It had started out as a misunderstanding, but five years down, he knew that wasn't the ending that he was looking for. "Dad, there's something I've got to do."
Rufus had seen Dan staring at Serena, perhaps there wasn't anything he could do about it, Serena had been, and was, Dan's first love, and he knew, it was impossible to forget your first love. "Tell Serena what you feel. Don't hold back what you'll regret." He gripped Dan's shoulder firmly, and smiled wryly as Dan took it in.
"Serena." Dan called her name, softly, it felt so personal. She was standing in a corner, holding a glass of champagne, staring outside the window, gazing into the dark sky. She turned around, her beautiful blond hair flipping as she did, capturing him in a way no other girl could. He walked towards her, and the slight nervousness that had held him just a few moments ago were shrugged off.
"Five years ago, on this day, I wouldn't be caught dead at a place like this. Five years ago, I felt like a fish out of water, but a beautiful angel spoke words of magic that I've never been able to forget. Five years ago, I met a girl that captured my heart, and I've never been able to get it back since. Five years ago, I fell in love. Five years ago, I knew I'd never be the same again. Five years ago, I finally understood what it meant to be in love from first sight."
Tears came to her eyes, and she couldn't help herself, the only words that came out were, "You remembered?"
"I would always remember this day, because if not for that party on 10-8-05, I would never have the chance to know someone as beautiful as you, I would never have experienced the feeling of loving someone wholeheartedly, and I wouldn't have even thought of flying to Paris to find the woman I love to tell her that I love her, and I would do anything just to be with her."
Flashes of shock reflected on Serena's eyes, "You were going to fly to Paris this summer?"
"I would have, had Georgina never turned up. I should have told you, when you came back, but with Milo around, it just made everything unnecessarily complicated, and I wasn't sure that you would want to be with me and a stepmother to Milo then. But now, I'm making my choices for myself, and I know that I want to be with you. I don't care what others will say. Five years ago I fell in love with you, five years on from that date, I'm never gonna let you go. Because I love you, Serena."
"I've never been able to know why I loved people. I know that sometimes, loving me isn't as easy as it should have been. I remember, those words you told me, why you loved me. How you were able to let it all out, how easy it was for you to say those three words. Perhaps I shouldn't hold back anymore, I really need to tell you why I love you." Serena put the glass of champagne aside, and the time that Dan told her his reasons for loving her, in the loft, just flew into her mind. There, that's why. Because I actually like it when you interrupt me, which is often, by the way. I love you, because you make no apologies about being exactly who you are. Beautiful, smart, sexy as hell. You're completely unaware of your effect on me. You're also completely unaware that you laugh like a four year old. And I love you because you can be with someone like me, and still be best friends with someone like Blair.
"I love you, because you make me feel like I'm truly special. No one ever looks at me the way you do, like I'm actually more than what others see. I love you, because of all the beautiful memories that remain from every single moment with you. You're amazing, because you don't care what others think of you. I love you, because you made telling me why you loved me so easy, when it's not. And I love you, because if not for you, I would never be able to tell you why I love you."
Your face, your race, the way that you talk; I kiss you, you're beautiful, I want you to walk
Five years, it seemed like five months the way it passed. The ups and downs, the decorated highs, the buried lows, moments they wished would never end, the moments they wish had never existed. The moments, when they knew everything was perfect and couldn't ask for more. Those moments, to last forever.
(A/N: I was looking for a song that had lyrics to describe five years, and all I could get was David Bowie's Five Years. And even then, just two lines. Mayday Parade's Three Cheers For Five Years is brilliant, but just doesn't fit. Hope you guys liked this.)
