Genres: Humor

Characters: Edward, Alphonse, Riza, Scar (FullMetal Alchemist), Father/Homunculus, Hughes, Add, Eve, Scar (Elsword).

Warning: Crack-ish, OOC and some swearing. [Set in FullMetal Alchemist: Brotherhood]

Character Job Classes

Chung/Ed – Tactical Trooper

Add – Diabolic Esper

Eve – Code Battle Seraph

Rose/Riza – Storm Trooper

I don't own either FullMetal Alchemist or Elsword.


01. Hughes meets Add


Maes Hughes stared in horror as Envy, who was in the form of his beloved wife, pointed the gun at him. Envy smirked, about to pull the trigger when suddenly a blinding flash of light accompanied by mad laughter filled the phone booth. Said light disappeared just as quickly as it came.

"Where the fuck did he go?!" Envy cursed, trying to figure out how Hughes had disappeared in a flash of light.

With Hughes;

"Gah- damn it- I don't have enough power- the theory was perfect- if only I had Eve's core- why can't I- shit!"

Hughes stared at the frustrated man, standing up. "Hey there! You look like you could use some cheering up. Here! Look at these pictures! This is my darling daughter, isn't she the cutest~"

(And thus Hughes' journey with Add to get back to his own timeline began.)


02. Two short people in one


When Ed woke up that day, he knew something was off. Was it the fact that he had regained all the memories of his past life as Chung while he slept? Nah, that felt natural. What didn't feel right was his lack of armour and cannon.

Ed turned to Al, eye twitching in desperate irritation. "Say, Al, do you think Winry would be willing to make me a cannon?"

"I'd love to!" Winry exclaimed excitedly, jumping into the scene from who-knows-where.

"Really!?" Ed's eyes sparkled, "then some armour as well!?"

Al just stared in confusion as Ed drew the diagram of what he wanted, opting not to ask where his brother's sudden fascination with cannons came from.


03. Alphonse and Eve


When Al had first met the expressionless robot –Nasod- he had immediately clicked with Eve, both of them connecting in a rather odd way. He even introduced her the world's most wonderful and majestic creatures- cats.

Which, as it turned out, Eve liked just as much as he did.

Ed stared from a kitten covered Alphonse to a kitten covered Eve, immediately recognising the Nasod. The elder Elric sighed in defeat at the begging looks the two were giving him. "Fine, the cats can stay- so can Eve."

"Thank you brother!" Al thanked. "But how do you know who Eve is?"

"Err. . ."

Eve tilted her head, analysing Ed. "Reincarnation of Chung?"

Ed's shoulders slumped. "Yeah."

"You're still as short as ever."

"DON'T CALL ME SHORT DAMN IT!"


04. Scar versus Scar


The Ishvalan stared at the Demon, tense and waiting for the other to make his move- well prepared to use brutal force if necessary.

"Got any Kings?"

"Go fish."

"Shit," the Demon growled, "why did I give up world domination again?"

"'Because the world of Alchemy is a terrifying place and you picked a fight with Izumi Curtis and Olivier Armstrong on their 'girls day off'?'" The Ishvalan supplied.

The Demon shuddered at the memory.


05. Riza- the descendant of Rose


When Riza Hawkeye showed up on the Promised Day with multiple weapons ranging from handguns to mini-cannons to a whole arsenal of highly advanced Heavy-Artillery equipment, everyone was freaking out because who the heck thought that giving the Hawk's Eye those things was a good idea!?

. . . Everyone except for Ed, that was. Edward held rather fond memories from his time as Chung traveling as part of the 'Elgang'- seeing a descendant of Rose fight off a hoard of zombies and Envy was a welcoming sight.

Roy, on the other hand, made a mental note to make sure Hawkeye never got her hands on such weaponry ever again.


06. Poor Father


Father was just about ready to call the whole 'gain the power of God' thing off, already making plans for a vacation- apparently the far-east part of Xing was a wondrous place to be this time of year. Between the cannon and bomb wielding shorty, an overpowered woman using so much Heavy-Artillery that seemed to come out of nowhere, the laser-firing girl protecting Alphonse and the two Scars. . .

Well. . . It was safe to say he was screwed!

And then, to make his situation even worse, the missing Maes Hughes came out of a strange portal with an insanely overpowered mad scientist following after him- the two were definitely good friends.

"I GIVE UP!" Father shrieked, transmuting a giant white flag to show his surrender. "Please! Spare me! I chose the wrong place to turn into a Philosophers Stone!"

Sadly, his desperate and fearful pleas were ignored as Ed, Riza, Eve and Add all seemed to prepare for some kind of final attack. In unison, the four shouted;

"SATELLITE RAIN!"

"ANCIENT TRIGGER!"

"PSYCHIC ARTILLERY!"

"PARANOIA!"

Needless to say, not only did Father not make it out alive, but the whole northern part of Central City was destroyed by the four's combined Hyper Active attacks.


Poor Father: End